Is Husband moving into wifes family house frowned upon?

[YM Usrah Umar]

salam, hope all is well

i have found someone that i wish to marry, we like each other very much, we live several hours away as we're both from different citys. however her dad has been very honest with me and has said he doesnt want her daughter to relocate so far and he wants me to relocate to where they stay.

he knows my situation with work, i finally got work 2 months ago due to recession but its part time job but with the girls father, he has many businesses and has said he can easily put me in any one of them or get me jobs outside his own businesses. i have no intention of scrounging from him

i told my mother and several other people and they have said you moving to their house is frowned upon, ul be seen like a dog lol. i can see where ther coming from cuz its normal for the girl to move into husbands family house or husband house. i have respect for my parents decision but have said to them try to be reasonable on ur decision. the way i see it...its just another way of preventing two people getting married, imo it be silly to end this all due to location

just wanting to know what your guys opinions where? is there any example of men in the past moving into ther wifes house or ther in laws house?

 

[ardianto]

Assalamualaikum.

Depend on which culture. In Indonesian culture is normal if a husband live in the wife house. Even if new married couple haven't afford to rent or buy a house usually they live in the wife parent house. However, in Pakistani culture, if a husband live in the wife house, he would be regarded as a man who neglect his reponsibility to give a home to the wife. But I don't know about Arab culture.

 

[YM Usrah Umar]

Assalamualaikum.

Depend on which culture. In Indonesian culture is normal if a husband live in the wife house. Even if new married couple haven't afford to rent or buy a house usually they live in the wife parent house.

indonesian yh...hmmm intresting, good to hear they dont find it a problem

However, in Pakistani culture, if a husband live in the wife house, he would be regarded as a man who neglect his reponsibility to give a home to the wife.

that would be harsh, the guy doesnt have money for his own place and already hes been accused ofr neglecting his responsibility.

But I don't know about Arab culture.

im curious to know if any arabs brothers here can tell us

 

[YM Usrah Umar]

i actually thought this before that musa (as) actually lived with his father in law

 

[ardianto]

that would be harsh, the guy doesnt have money for his own place and already hes been accused ofr neglecting his responsibility.

Not so harsh like this. What I mean with "home" actually is not a "house". But place for living, like in the husband parent house.

English is not my first langauge.

By the way, are you Arab, bro.

 

[YM Usrah Umar]

Not so harsh like this. What I mean with "home" actually is not a "house". But place for living, like in the husband parent house.

English is not my first langauge.

By the way, are you Arab, bro.

no im not arab bro lol....glad i aint...kidn.

 

[AabiruSabeel]

i actually thought this before that musa (as) actually lived with his father in law

Yes, Musa :as: lived with his father in law for 10 years after his marriage. Some of the Seerah books also mention that the Prophet Muhammad :saws: moved from Abu Talib's house to Khadijah :raha:'s house after his marriage.

Depend on which culture. In Indonesian culture is normal if a husband live in the wife house.

Even in India, there are few places where the husband lives in his in-law's house for at least a few days after the marriage.

 

[Periwinkle18]

Assalam o alikum

Honestly akhi I would say do what ever u feel like doing ppl r gng to say tons of things n r gng tthingsn on tons of thinfs you can't make everyone happy. In Pakistan living in ur wife's parents house is like a big no no ppl tease n say all sorts of things buh I would say listen to ur heart do what u think is right what would make u happy n ur family happy.


May Allah bless you ameen.

 

[YM Usrah Umar]

Yes, Musa :as: lived with his father in law for 10 years after his marriage. Some of the Seerah books also mention that the Prophet Muhammad :saws: moved from Abu Talib's house to Khadijah :raha:'s house after his marriage.




Even in India, there are few places where the husband lives in his in-law's house for at least a few days after the marriage.

Thats for a few days...that aint a problem lol. I didnt kno musa (as) stayed ther for 10 years mashallah

 

[Periwinkle18]

^its in the quran.

 

[YM Usrah Umar]

Assalam o alikum

Honestly akhi I would say do what ever u feel like doing ppl r gng to say tons of things n r gng tthingsn on tons of thinfs you can't make everyone happy. In Pakistan living in ur wife's parents house is like a big no no ppl tease n say all sorts of things buh I would say listen to ur heart do what u think is right what would make u happy n ur family happy.


May Allah bless you ameen.

Generally im a guy that doesnt give a monkeys on watever anyone else think apart from giving advice from parents etc. I jus wouldnt want anythn to prevent us to get married, any help would be great but I hope all works out of course