isn't lying prohibited?

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Confused0122

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Salam..
I know that lying is prohibited in the Quran: "Truly Allah guides not one who transgresses and lies." (40:28) But I came across a Hadith saying: “Lying is wrong, except in three things: the lie of a man to his wife to make her content with him; a lie in war, for war is deception; or a lie to settle trouble between people” (Ahmad, 6.459. H).
I understand that it's good to lie to settle problems between people if it's a white lie, something harmless. What I fail to comprehend though, is why a man can lie to his wife to make her content with him. Does this mean he can go out and do something forbidden or something she doesn't like and then lie to her just so she's not angry with her? Somebody please add on.
 
“The signs of a hypocrite are three: when he speaks he lies, when he promises he breaks it, and when entrusted with something he betrays it” (Bukhari, 1.15: 33. S).
 
Confused0122 said:
Salam..
I know that lying is prohibited in the Quran: "Truly Allah guides not one who transgresses and lies." (40:28) But I came across a Hadith saying: “Lying is wrong, except in three things: the lie of a man to his wife to make her content with him; a lie in war, for war is deception; or a lie to settle trouble between people” (Ahmad, 6.459. H).
I understand that it's good to lie to settle problems between people if it's a white lie, something harmless. What I fail to comprehend though, is why a man can lie to his wife to make her content with him. Does this mean he can go out and do something forbidden or something she doesn't like and then lie to her just so she's not angry with her? Somebody please add on.
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I think this has more to do with home situations like your wife spent the whole day cooking and what she cooked tastes horrible. Even then I think the lie has to be in such a manner it causes no harm and there is no intent to deceive.

Of course if at all possible the truth would be better, such as the husband could say " This is the best Barbecued yucca root I ever ate." Provided that is the first and only time he ever ate Barbecued Yucca root.
 
Woodrow said:
I think this has more to do with home situations like your wife spent the whole day cooking and what she cooked tastes horrible. Even then I think the lie has to be in such a manner it causes no harm and there is no intent to deceive.

Of course if at all possible the truth would be better, such as the husband could say " This is the best Barbecued yucca root I ever ate." Provided that is the first and only time he ever ate Barbecued Yucca root.
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Jazak Allah Khair brother.. That never occured to me. lol and I would prefer that the husband lies than to say EW WHAT ON EARTH IS THAT!!
 
Woodrow said:
I think this has more to do with home situations like your wife spent the whole day cooking and what she cooked tastes horrible. Even then I think the lie has to be in such a manner it causes no harm and there is no intent to deceive.

Of course if at all possible the truth would be better, such as the husband could say " This is the best Barbecued yucca root I ever ate." Provided that is the first and only time he ever ate Barbecued Yucca root.
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I don't know I have a bit of a problem with this. These white lies in those situations leaves little to no improvement. If your wife's meal tastes horrible, why lie and say it's good so she can make it the exact same way again. I'm not saying one has to be mean about it, but telling it how it is, is always best and offering advice to make it better is good too. And instances when a wife asked for her husband's opinion on something I imagine they want the truth not to be 'comforted' by a lie. I'm not saying going out and actively pointing out faults in everyone, but I don't think lying about it gets anyone anywhere. And you would be deceiving her to a certain extent even with 'this is the best..." because it implies that you've eaten other ones and deemed this particular one the best.[/CENTER]
 
lol we cant stupidly do major sinning and lie to our wives, thats a nono!

whats meant here is that we are not suppose to upset them by being "brutally" honest! the harsh truth! the cold stone hard to accept TRUTH!!!!

so instead when they walk in all fat n ugly u say "mashAllah" and smile



but seriously, the ruling is intended to keep the peace, NOT TO HIDE HUGE SINS!
 
Confused0122 said:
Salam..
I know that lying is prohibited in the Quran: "Truly Allah guides not one who transgresses and lies." (40:28) But I came across a Hadith saying: “Lying is wrong, except in three things: the lie of a man to his wife to make her content with him; a lie in war, for war is deception; or a lie to settle trouble between people” (Ahmad, 6.459. H).
I understand that it's good to lie to settle problems between people if it's a white lie, something harmless. What I fail to comprehend though, is why a man can lie to his wife to make her content with him. Does this mean he can go out and do something forbidden or something she doesn't like and then lie to her just so she's not angry with her? Somebody please add on.
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No. It's for situations where the husband might lie that he liked his wife's cooking, so as not to hurt her feelings because she exerted a lot of effort. Situations like that.

It is not a positive obligation though. Obviously, you can't just always tell white lies, otherwise nothing will change. It's at the husband's discretion. It's pretty simple - it just becomes complicated if one overthinks it. Like Fighting4Imaan said, it's for keeping the peace.

It is most definitely not a justification for adultery, or for the husband to conceal his own bad deeds.
 
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Jazak Allah everyone.. Thank you sister- BoredAgnostic- for giving me your opinion.. It's true that nothing will improve if she's told her food is great because she'll end up cooking it the same way every time lol. However, I don't think he should throw it in her face that moment. Maybe he could say it was delicious and then cook with her the next time and she how she does it.. He could probably help her cook it a different way, and she'll indirectly get the message herself if she likes it better than what she cooked.
 
Confused0122 said:
Salam..
I know that lying is prohibited in the Quran: "Truly Allah guides not one who transgresses and lies." (40:28) But I came across a Hadith saying: “Lying is wrong, except in three things: the lie of a man to his wife to make her content with him; a lie in war, for war is deception; or a lie to settle trouble between people” (Ahmad, 6.459. H).
I understand that it's good to lie to settle problems between people if it's a white lie, something harmless. What I fail to comprehend though, is why a man can lie to his wife to make her content with him. Does this mean he can go out and do something forbidden or something she doesn't like and then lie to her just so she's not angry with her? Somebody please add on.
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Another Shahih Hadits include the words "and the words of wife to her husband."


assalamu'alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh.
 
Confused0122 said:
“Lying is wrong, except in three things: the lie of a man to his wife to make her content with him; a lie in war, for war is deception; or a lie to settle trouble between people” (Ahmad, 6.459. H).
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So it's ok for men to lie but not for women.
 
:sl: Lies are lies and cause nothing but hatred between people. I never minded that my husband lied when there was too much salt in the dhal type of thing............... but when it comes to lies about deception and deciet it is very very hard to forget...........................:w::)
Confused0122 said:
Jazak Allah Khair brother.. That never occured to me. lol and I would prefer that the husband lies than to say EW WHAT ON EARTH IS THAT!!
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Whatsthepoint said:
So it's ok for men to lie but not for women.
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"Truly Allah guides not one who transgresses and lies." (40:28) But I came across a Hadith saying: “Lying is wrong, except in three things: the lie of a man to his wife to make her content with him; a lie in war, for war is deception; or a lie to settle trouble between people” (Ahmad, 6.459. H).

The highlighted bit could quite easily cover your question. Though, if that isn't enough, I think the first point could quite easily refer to women too as in it is ok for women to lie to her husband to make him content with her.
 
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