[AnonymousPoster]

Salam

I wanted some encouragement....

We are 6 brothers, and im the 2nd eldest. My elder brother (his 25) doesnt want to get married yet because he wants to experience life and establish a career. So my parents asked me if i wanted to get married (i am 20). I said i didnt mind, and i made it clear that i will continue my studies and work. And if thats ok, then i wouldnt mind him looking as i feel i am ready to get married.

The problem is, my family is ok, except my eldest brother. Also alot of my cousins are against the marriage because i am younger than him (thats what my eldest brother says). I dont know what to think.

My question is.....is my eldest brother right, that i shouldnt get married until he does? What does Islam day about this? Any examples?

JazakAllah Khair

Salam

 

[Intisar]

Don't listen to them, I'm the youngest in my family and the same thing happened to me. I would honestly be waiting around like a spinster if I took other people's advice. If you're ready, financially stable and able-bodied, then go for it inshaAllaah.

 

[aadil77]

persuade him to get married, if he doesn't then you go for it and naturally he'll have to follow to avoid the shame or whatever

 

[Najm]

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

Well akhi, i think if your ready for marriage, and you can handle the pressure of work life and family life, as you brother is not up for marriage say he says, then go for gold

At the end of the day, your the one who will have to take care of your wife, not your oldest brothers :rollseyes

FiAmaaniAllah

 

[true believer]

dats igorence. since did age define the course of our lives? brother i feel for u but its just igorence. whats age got to do wiz it? n who cares what ppl think? live ur life, its too short to argue bout such things. its just ridiousous. (excuse ma bad spelling) but u know what i mean! lol...dnt let it get u down. so what r u supposed to do?...WAIT FOR HIM? u bein serious?...just move on. he'll get over it dw salam btw dats very selfish of him, dnt listen! ur family is ok wiz it...he will be soon.

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

The problem is, my family is ok, except my eldest brother. Also alot of my cousins are against the marriage because i am younger than him (thats what my eldest brother says). I dont know what to think.

if your older brother doesnt want to get married now, then why should you have to be the one "suffering." its his choice and therefore your "turn" so why should that be a problem...

My question is.....is my eldest brother right, that i shouldnt get married until he does? What does Islam day about this? Any examples?

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/13518/older

 

[Yanal]

:salamext:

You are in a simple dilema that you can only rely on Allah and your instinct. Would you want to miss the chance of marrying a religious woman good for your life or would you want to get scared from you cousins talk who may be envying you because you are about to get married? The answer will come to you if you have the will and right thinking,Allah will guide you insh'Allah. My opinion would be to get married,you might not find a better time to do so,all the best and may Allah guide you! Ameen.

 

[AnonymousPoster]

Salam

Thank you for your time brothers and sisters for helping me out. This forum has always been very helpful.

Also jazakiAllah Khair for the link. Hope this helps other people too.

Salam

Anon N

 

[Layla454]

You don't need to wait for him to get married. Its not about chronology, its about when you are ready.

 

[Banu_Hashim]

As far as I'm aware Islam doesn't say anything on this matter in particular. So, if you truly think you are ready for marriage then go for it, inshaAllah. I don't see how your brothers decisions should inhibit yours. Someone mentioned something about shame. Well, I don't shame in it, and people always talk. So let them talk a bit more.

Fe Amaanillah.