Mother or Education??

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PSmuslim

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Assalaamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatu,

I live alone in my appartment. I really enjoy it because I can study without distraction and relax and so on.. My mother moved to another appartment in the same city I live and because some issues she can't live in my appartment. Yesterday she was asking if she could live with me again.

I don't think that's a bad idea. But I know we have such temperatures that I couldn't concentrate in studying if she was around me. She says she needs children around her and I know she needs them but I refused to take her bag since she has her appartment and I don't wan to ruin my studying. But it might be so that one of my friends move to live with me but I don't think that's bad thing because I don't believe it will affect to studying. But I feel very bad for my mother.

Now I'm thinking two things. One: should I still take my mother to live with me and then stop studying.. I'm sure I would stop educating myself.. I'm barely 18 years old but islamically thinking we should take care of our parents.. I could work as cleaner or such things insha Allah but I thought that if I educated myself I could do much better da'wa and help ummah in the more effective way.. and of course take much better care of my family, insha Allah.

The second thing is that I'm thinking again if I should take this friend to live with me. I don't want to hurt my mother if you get the point...

Okay there's still one thing I was thinking.. that maybe I should move to another city to study. Then it wouldn't hurt anybody if I lived alone. But moving itself would maybe do that..
 
I am still learning:rollseyes and live in my parents apartment and i feel well here. I can study, work, walk with mom, she never was an obstacle to my studies.:-[
 
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Asalamu Alaikum,

Bro/Sis, do you love your Lord? If yes, you should do your best to please Him. Allah commands us to love and care for our parents. Your mother needs you and wants to keep the family close. Do not deny her request.

You will be able to study no matter what... don't convince yourself otherwise that you may not be able to continue in your studies just because your mom is living with you. In fact, she'll help you... perhaps she can create dinner for you so you don't have to waste too much time.

Mothers are always protective of their children, so the only thing she can do that you may or may not like is that she'll keep an eye out for you... for example... staying out late with friends..etc.

But, Inshallah, your studies will be fine and you'll fulfill your duty to your parents and please your creator.

The decision is of course yours to make... and may Allah help you make the right one. Ameen.

W'salaamz
 
Wa alaikummussalam,

thank you for your kind replies. May Allah reward you from that. I was about to write this threat as anonymous BUT something happened and my nickname turned up.. and I didn't know how to delete the post.

But thank you for your kind replies.

I hope I love my Lord and I hope I love my parents too. The both of the parents very special persons, and not just because they are my parents, but because they are really special, alhamdulillah.

I have barely time for my friends.. I have barely time for my family too. That's why I thought it's better to live alone. But now I have to think this thing again too.
 
PSmuslim said:
Wa alaikummussalam,

thank you for your kind replies. May Allah reward you from that. I was about to write this threat as anonymous BUT something happened and my nickname turned up.. and I didn't know how to delete the post.

But thank you for your kind replies.

I hope I love my Lord and I hope I love my parents too. The both of the parents very special persons, and not just because they are my parents, but because they are really special, alhamdulillah.

I have barely time for my friends.. I have barely time for my family too. That's why I thought it's better to live alone. But now I have to think this thing again too.
Click to expand...

MashaAllah it's good of you to consider your mother's needs. So Allah swt will consider yours too.


FIRSTLY A NOTE 2 DA ADMIN: ANNONYMOUS IS ACTUALLY SPELT A-N-N-O-N-Y-M-O-U-S WID TWO N'S AND NOT ONE U CONFUSIN ME PEOPLE!!
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Sorry, but admin'z right - you're wrong :X
 
A man came to the Prophet
Muhammad  and said: “O Messenger of God! Who among
the people is the most worthy of my good companionship?”
The Prophet  said: { Your mother. } The man said: “Then
who?” The Prophet  said: { Then your mother. } The man
further asked: “Then who?” The Prophet  said: { Then your
mother. } The man asked again: “Then who?” The Prophet 
said: { Then your father. }


Though it may be hard, if anyone is to move in with you it should be your mother. Speak to her and let her know that your studies are very important. She will understand. Set aside certain hours of the day that are strictly for you to study. Go to your room/or office and let her know that you can't be disturbed during this time. Hope this helps!
 
anonymous said:
errrrrrrrrrrrr honey i got AA in eng lit n lang i know wat am talkin bout :p
Click to expand...


nope...grades arent everything...its spelt anonymous...i know because i do.

and like i said...grades arent everything...this goes to PSmuslim, your grades may help you give better da'wah, but if for them, you abandon your mum, it is all in vain. you can still give better da'wah if you dont have that good grades...note, im not saying that good grades are bad...you ought to stive for them, but that doesnt necessarily mean that leave your mum as she is. and one thing i dont get...is why would your mum living with you affect your studies?...i mean if you have to work for her, if thats the thing, you're working for yourself too arent you?...if this is about houseworks, if she is living alone, i am guessing that she should be capable of working, cooking etc for herself...if it is working to earn money, dont you have to do that yourself? or doesnt your mum get benefits?...and if she moves in with you, wouldnt that help save the money that she pays for her apartment?

even if you say that having friends around isnt going to hamper your studies,...let me tell you one thing...you're wrong...you want to know why? because no matter how much you want to study, under peer pressure, you just wont be able to. its just too hard. everytime i go to my friends house for a sleepover, i plan im going to do some science revision...but once im there, im like 'tsshh...who cares...can do that tomorrow', but then tomorrow, i have more work, more pressure...and become stressed....but thats not the point. the point is that with friends around, you wont be able to study...and thus if your mum wants to live with you, and you want someone around, she is the one :)

:w:
 
im 15 years old and i dno how its lyk coping without my mum yet lol, but i think its gna b very very hard for me.
dear bro/sis, dnt u fl there is sumtin missing wen ur not with her?
 

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