Assalam o alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh,
After having a recent setback or reality check, I have turned to Allah even more so than what I should have been. I have now doing 5xSalah, asking for forgiveness/repentance in the bad things I may have done over the years but especially with what has happened recently.
I also did Ramadan Alhumdulilah this year, and has been a while since I have done so (but have given my Sadqah/Zakat)
I have been watching ALOT of Nouman Ali Khan and Mufti Menk talks, lectures etc... and absolutely LOVE them. May Allah grant them both good things in this life and in the hereafter, Ameen.
Not only am I learning so much but also at times it makes me realize a lot of things too.
I fear that I have done the wrong for many years that even asking for forgiveness is meaningless. For instance not even making Salah for many years has me pretty upset in addition to the recent pain/suffering I have suffered. I know that was a punishment from Allah but I just don't know what to think or do anymore.
In Ramadan, I learnt to do even the most simplest of things and still do it to this day, for instance: reading 100x Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, Allahu Akbar which has many benefits.
I don't know what to think or do. I hope Allah forgives but at the same time, I feel like I have done so bad over the years that... I'm a lost cause. Of course, I want to save myself from Hell fire too. I do read 1 or 2 duas to help with this but again, I don't know if this helps or not. Only Allah SWT knows best.
Is there anything that I can try to do to help ease the fear or pain? Anything to... make me feel better?
I admit, I feel at ease when I am doing the Salah and calms me down when I am anxious in anything but I still fear that in the hereafter... the day of judgement.... that I am a lost cause.
thank you.
After having a recent setback or reality check, I have turned to Allah even more so than what I should have been. I have now doing 5xSalah, asking for forgiveness/repentance in the bad things I may have done over the years but especially with what has happened recently.
I also did Ramadan Alhumdulilah this year, and has been a while since I have done so (but have given my Sadqah/Zakat)
I have been watching ALOT of Nouman Ali Khan and Mufti Menk talks, lectures etc... and absolutely LOVE them. May Allah grant them both good things in this life and in the hereafter, Ameen.
Not only am I learning so much but also at times it makes me realize a lot of things too.
I fear that I have done the wrong for many years that even asking for forgiveness is meaningless. For instance not even making Salah for many years has me pretty upset in addition to the recent pain/suffering I have suffered. I know that was a punishment from Allah but I just don't know what to think or do anymore.
In Ramadan, I learnt to do even the most simplest of things and still do it to this day, for instance: reading 100x Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, Allahu Akbar which has many benefits.
I don't know what to think or do. I hope Allah forgives but at the same time, I feel like I have done so bad over the years that... I'm a lost cause. Of course, I want to save myself from Hell fire too. I do read 1 or 2 duas to help with this but again, I don't know if this helps or not. Only Allah SWT knows best.
Is there anything that I can try to do to help ease the fear or pain? Anything to... make me feel better?
I admit, I feel at ease when I am doing the Salah and calms me down when I am anxious in anything but I still fear that in the hereafter... the day of judgement.... that I am a lost cause.

thank you.