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*~Sofia~*

*~Sofia~*

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:w:

well ive gone and done sumfing real stupid lol

Ok so im in my final year in uni, and startin my final year project. Me an ma mates have all been assigned the same supervisor.. the thing is he just not supervisor material... he never responds to emails, hardly ever in his room when we go see him, doesnt explain things properly and in detail.. and generally cant be bothered!

Passing the project is essential for our degree, so as u can imagine we are all very stressed an scared bout the project... having a bad supervisor just makes things worse :offended:

So on monday we went to see him, as u can guess, he wasnt there,a technician told us to go bak at 2 and we did. he still wasnt there so we left dissapointed.

I then emailed him, hopin he would get back to us, and he did.

I just tld him that he hardly responds to emails, and that we want to start our project as soon as possible as other ppl in our course have already started theirs. And told him that we had lots of questions to ask him, and if he can tell us wen we can come and see him it would be appreciated.

That don't sound bad does it?

well surprisingly he got back.. and started tellin me where he was at all these specific times, and told me that he didnt like 'the general tone' of my last email!

I was like :confused: it wasnt intended to be bad or nefing.. i just wanted to tell him that we wanted to get on with our project!

and he goes that we will discuss my 'general tone' when we next meet!

Im kinda scared lol coz he's meant to be marking our project and we still havnt even started the experiments and i've already got on the wrong side of him! :offended:

lol i know this is very long and a minor problem..but any advice would be appreciated! im gettin scared every time i think about it now :hmm:

HELP!

w'salam
 
^ dont wry he wont bite and if he does then get a bro to kick his *S%S$

jokes aside, nothing to worry about. With good intentions you emailed him out of concern for your work, if anything then apologise for the accidentally implied tone in the email, tell him it was a email of concern and not attack and that you just wanted help for your project and would appreciate him being around to help more often. Finally apologise a last time and let him know your intentions, tell him you'll be more careful and formal and courteous and all that kirap so that he doesnt snap again.


i know you aint done nothing wrong, but working in a building where i regularly have to deal with these typa people, i learned what tehy r like, all high n mighty fishes they are !! not all of them though, ONE of them is REALLY nice :D
 
:sl:

sis maybe he was offended by your last mails. so relax take a deep breath and know that you've done nothing wrong. coz if u miss this project u might lose somefing minor. the thing that u can do is settle the matters with ur mates, and decides, before the 'next general tone' to go and meet him. if possible, if u see that he is hard of understanding ur plea, try to do a little compromise and ask him for forgiveness, coz on one hand u know that ur innocent, but before Allah u r the winner! believe me and cheer sis. The rest is upon u. watever u do be confident and do bismillah b4 zat.
best of luck!
 
Salamualikum.

Don'y worry sister you never did anything. If i in the same situation that your in now i would feel vexed because firslty he's not helping you to achieve the aspirational and secondly he has the nerve to get angry over asking for help.. Thats ridiculous!
Take my advice do not panic take it easy, remember you was asking for help nothing else, you are not in the wrong the dude is in the wrong and he knows that.
People who tend to make a big deal out of little things really means there in wrong and it's true. Let it be, if he wants to have a word with you so let it be.. Your not going to sacrifice your self just for some horrid supervisor not helping you.. thats so not going on..

When the dude has a 'word' with you about your tone i guess you should explain to him in civil manner you need more help and you've been extremly panicing about the assignment, and you've been stressing.. explain your feelings aswel sister otherwise he will take you for gurantage... Even though he may not apologise to you, for the good side just apologise to him..
Insha'Allaah explain to him and it will be fine...

May Allaah make it easy for you ... Amin

Ma'assalama
 
Last edited:
^Jazakhallah khair brother for gettin back so quikly and replying wid some good advice :thumbs_up

^ dont wry he wont bite and if he does then get a bro to kick his *S%S$
Click to expand...

^ ;D

Jazakhallah loads, I was actually finking of tellin him that my 'tone' wasn't intentional and that.. I just hope he accepts my appology.. and doesn't mark my work down :X i'll probably go in and see him on monday inshallah.. with my mates of course (dont wanna go there on ma J's!) lol

Neway thnx again bro, helped me out big time, i'll deffo use some (or most!) of your reply in my speech :D

I dont feel as scared now! :)

w'salam
 
awww jazakhallah sister for the kind words :D you both have really helped put a smile on ma face and think that this 'problem' isn't so bad after all!

Jazakhallah again sisters, i'll be sure to put ur advice into good use inshallah.. when i go see him on monday.

May Allaah make it easy for you ... Amin
Click to expand...

^ameen :)

w'salam sisters
xxx
 
Assalamu Alaikkum (warah)

Sis , First pray two raka Nafil before you start and make dua such that Allah will soften the heart of your Supervisor.

I have been through same cases and mine where even worse.

But on the next meets i tried to be more submissive and controlled my thoughts.

The supervisors first look students as students where they want the student to obey them and then later they will take u as a team member

So don't Worry always put all your questions and demands before Allah

and Allah shall change the mind and heart of those whom u feel a bit scared

Insha Allah
 
jazakhallah khair brother shible for the advice.. inshallah everything will be ok.. im jst panickin for no reason!

w'salam
 
When you talk to him next, remember that just like animals, when people feel backed into a corner they often snap and bite back. You may not have intended to back him into a corner, but if he was neglecting you he might have already been feeling guilty about it, and then your email sent him over the edge and instead of taking personal responsibility he lashed out at you.

It's not your fault (unless your tone with him was different than what you wrote here -- you might want to have someone who will tell you the truth, not just try to please you read over your email and see if they see anything in it that you didn't intend). But, now you know that he might be touchy about some of these things you will be better prepared for your next meeting with him.

When you "talk about your tone". I don't think you should apologize for contacting him and asking for the help. Just let him know that you weren't attacking him, and ask him not to read into what you wrote things that you weren't trying to say. Admit that you were getting anxious, needing help from him, and wanting to get started. He shouldn't have a problem with that. If he does, then perhaps you need to take your concerns to whoever it is that assigned him to work with you.
 
Grace Seeker said:
When you talk to him next, remember that just like animals, when people feel backed into a corner they often snap and bite back. You may not have intended to back him into a corner, but if he was neglecting you he might have already been feeling guilty about it, and then your email sent him over the edge and instead of taking personal responsibility he lashed out at you.

It's not your fault (unless your tone with him was different than what you wrote here -- you might want to have someone who will tell you the truth, not just try to please you read over your email and see if they see anything in it that you didn't intend). But, now you know that he might be touchy about some of these things you will be better prepared for your next meeting with him.

When you "talk about your tone". I don't think you should apologize for contacting him and asking for the help. Just let him know that you weren't attacking him, and ask him not to read into what you wrote things that you weren't trying to say. Admit that you were getting anxious, needing help from him, and wanting to get started. He shouldn't have a problem with that. If he does, then perhaps you need to take your concerns to whoever it is that assigned him to work with you.
Click to expand...

Peace,

Thanks Graceseeker for the much appreciated advice. I showed the email I sent to one of my mates and she also said that there was no 'tone' in the email.. and that he just got the wrong end of the stick! I emailed him a short while ago, explaining things.. i hope he accepts the apology :muddlehea
I will be seeing him on monday, and i will memba ur advice.. thnx again :)

Peace out
 
Well as a side note, I do understand your position. I'm not in last year uni, but I have been put in a similar position in one of the bigger projects I did last year. It wasn't my fault and my coordinator was being very difficult. He was supposed to grade our work and I ended up with a very bad mark. Although my work was quite good by other's standards. So I just went to higher ups and explained the situation and got a better mark from them. If you feel that there is a problem, then just go and tell his higher ups. You've got those emails as proof and its up to them to judge.

I'd be concerned more about my mark than about my attitude towards him :p. Yes I sound a little cranky, but I've had my fair share of being screwed by others and also of screwing others :D

Inshallah everything will resolve itself for your case :) Though, I wouldn't want to get on anyone's bad side unless absolutely necessary.

Salam sis :)
 
I didn't read anyone's response but I did read the original and frankly, I don't see what you are worried about? You had a legitimate concern which he repeatedly ignored. When you go to the meeting with him make your requests and quesries without facial expressions and don't be overly apolegetic.. if he brings it up... ask him what he thinks would have been a more appropriate approach for you to take under the circumstance? that way you can learn two things at once...

lots of luck on your project
waslaam
 
Salams all,

Well I went to see my supervsor yesterday, and alhamdulillah it went well :smile: phew! (thats another load off ma mind! :D )
He asked who we were, and then when I told him my name, his face went 'oh..it was you then' lol

But I quickly apologised for the accidently implied 'tone' and said that I was just concerned for my work etc etc...

He just said that there were 'inaccuracies' in the email that I sent, but after looking thru his sent emails, he realised he was guilty and he apologised himself ! :D

So it's all ok now, he's gonna respond to emails from now on, and try be of more help in the future.

Jazakhallah to all brothers and sisters who advised me.. it was greatly appreciated,thank you from the bottom of ma hart.. I pray that Allah (swt) rewards you all for helping a sis out :)

w'salams :D
 
*~Sofia~* said:
:w:

well ive gone and done sumfing real stupid lol

Ok so im in my final year in uni, and startin my final year project. Me an ma mates have all been assigned the same supervisor.. the thing is he just not supervisor material... he never responds to emails, hardly ever in his room when we go see him, doesnt explain things properly and in detail.. and generally cant be bothered!

Passing the project is essential for our degree, so as u can imagine we are all very stressed an scared bout the project... having a bad supervisor just makes things worse :offended:

So on monday we went to see him, as u can guess, he wasnt there,a technician told us to go bak at 2 and we did. he still wasnt there so we left dissapointed.

I then emailed him, hopin he would get back to us, and he did.

I just tld him that he hardly responds to emails, and that we want to start our project as soon as possible as other ppl in our course have already started theirs. And told him that we had lots of questions to ask him, and if he can tell us wen we can come and see him it would be appreciated.

That don't sound bad does it?

well surprisingly he got back.. and started tellin me where he was at all these specific times, and told me that he didnt like 'the general tone' of my last email!

I was like :confused: it wasnt intended to be bad or nefing.. i just wanted to tell him that we wanted to get on with our project!

and he goes that we will discuss my 'general tone' when we next meet!

Im kinda scared lol coz he's meant to be marking our project and we still havnt even started the experiments and i've already got on the wrong side of him! :offended:

lol i know this is very long and a minor problem..but any advice would be appreciated! im gettin scared every time i think about it now :hmm:

HELP!

w'salam
Click to expand...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SIS DATS JUS TOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNI MAN!! WAT EXACT;Y DIDJA WRITE IN D EMAIL!? U DINT GO F'IN N BLINDIN DIDJA AHAHAHAHAHAHAH CHILL OUUUUUTT HE CANT MARK U DOWN COZA DAT

DATS UNI LIFE 4 YA, U DONT GET SPOON FED U JUS GTA DEAL WID THINGS ON YA OWN

N U JUS REMINDED ME HOW SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWED I AM, I GTA RESEARCH PROJECT 2 DO 2 STIL AINT GTA CLU WAT THE HELL AM DUIN IT ON EVEN THO WAS MEANT 2 GIV MA PROPOSAL FORM IN DAAAAAAAAAYS AGO AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHH STRESSEDDDDDDDDDDDDD NEED TO CRYYYYYYYY
 
anonymous said:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SIS DATS JUS TOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNI MAN!! WAT EXACT;Y DIDJA WRITE IN D EMAIL!? U DINT GO F'IN N BLINDIN DIDJA AHAHAHAHAHAHAH CHILL OUUUUUTT HE CANT MARK U DOWN COZA DAT

DATS UNI LIFE 4 YA, U DONT GET SPOON FED U JUS GTA DEAL WID THINGS ON YA OWN

N U JUS REMINDED ME HOW SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWED I AM, I GTA RESEARCH PROJECT 2 DO 2 STIL AINT GTA CLU WAT THE HELL AM DUIN IT ON EVEN THO WAS MEANT 2 GIV MA PROPOSAL FORM IN DAAAAAAAAAYS AGO AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHH STRESSEDDDDDDDDDDDDD NEED TO CRYYYYYYYY
Click to expand...

Calm down, all stressing will give you is a rubbish project
 

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