Assalamu Alaikum
Jazakhllah for the valuable advice, it has really made me think... So do you think I should sort of avoid seeing him for a while?
Wa iyaki. Yes, I think you should avoid him. I've been told by males in my family, and including my own husband, if a guy really likes you, he will pursue you and would not want to lose you. This is also from personal experience. The only way you would know this is if you do not talk to him for the sake of allah and removing yourself from fitnah. If you tried to pursue him and you weren't sure about his feelings, you'll feel rejected if you didn't get the answer you wanted to hear, or something worse can happen like him taking advantage of your feelings, even if he doesn't seem like the type to do so. However, since you are sure about your
own feelings and you are putting your trust in Allah, then between now and the time you do get married, something will happen inshallah that will facilitate a marriage, whether it's with this guy or with someone else. You will know how he feels about you with time inshallah.
Also sister, I've been planning to do Istiqhara prayer about this issue, to pray for guidance from Allah and see if I should continue pursuing this hope etc., but I haven't been able to pray for this past week. However, I still make dua in my mind for Allah to guide me, and last night I did the same - that night I had a dream which was very positive (I heard that I shouldn't talk about what I see in dreams otherwise I would've said what I saw), but it was a really good one, and I woke up feeling really happy. Do you think it was just wishful thinking that caused it, or could it be a sign?
Istikhara, from my knowledge, is not based on dreams.
Dreams are of 3 types: From Allah, from shaitan (these are the types you shouldn't share), and from yourself. Sometimes if you're thinking about something too much, it will appear in your dream. So it could be that whatever you dreamed, was just from your own self wanting something.
Istikhara is based on what's going on around you and how you feel internally. For example, if you made istikhara to marry someone, and afterwards you had doubts about this person (even if you already like him), and/or if circumstances are making it much more difficult to marry him (eg. his/your family don't approve, car accident on his way to asking for your hand, things begin to change for the worse concerning the marriage, etc), then i would mean Allah is trying to push you away from being married to this person. Since you are developing feelings for him, it's best to not act on those feelings for now since you are not sure about a lot of things at the moment. It's usually obvious when a guy likes a girl, and since you can't tell, then you shouldn't try to pursue anything, because at least if you were able to tell, you could take the appropriate measures in discussing the future with him and your family.
fi aman Allah
w'salaam
