repentance

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:sl: BROTHERS AND SISTERS.

i have done a very bad sin, and wnat to repents, howver im feeling not guilty. i really want to repent.
jazakallhu khair
:sl:
 
Asalamu Alaikum

It's strange that you don't feel guilty for your actions and yet you want to repent. If its a major sin, you should feel guilty first... otherwise why would you have an urge to repent?

Anyway.... Ask Allah for forgiveness in your salaaah during prostration. Thats when you're closest to your Lord.

Allah is the most merciful... Inshallah you'll find him forgiving and merciful. Just ask for forgiveness sincerely.

Salaamz,
Hamid
 
I agree with DigitalStorm.
How can you repent a sin if you don't feel remorseful in the first place?

repentance –noun
1. deep sorrow, compunction, or contrition for a past sin, wrongdoing, or the like.
2. regret for any past action.

(dictionary.com)

So what exactly do you mean by repentance?

Peace
 
Asalamu Alaikum

It's strange that you don't feel guilty for your actions and yet you want to repent. If its a major sin, you should feel guilty first... otherwise why would you have an urge to repent?

Anyway.... Ask Allah for forgiveness in your salaaah during prostration. Thats when you're closest to your Lord.

Allah is the most merciful... Inshallah you'll find him forgiving and merciful. Just ask for forgiveness sincerely.

Salaamz,
Hamid
Does Allah forgive sins without the person feeling remorseful?
Can you ask for forgiveness sincerely without feeling remorseful?
 
:sl:

you do feel guilty thats why you want to repent..

in order to repent with sincerity,

think about;

The magnitude and the consequences of the sin

The burden the sin has on your heart

How you are displeasing Allah by comitting this sin

the fire of hell

the negative affect it will have on your life now and in the future
 
:salamext:


I think you've experienced this because when a person repeatedly does a sin, they gradually get used to it and their heart get's covered in darkness. You don't realise the difference between right and wrong because you don't actually regret it in your heart.

That's the consequence of repeated sins.


What you need to do is hide your sin from others first of all, and keep it between yourself and Allaah. Then make the repentance anyway and ask Allaah to forgive you - especially in moments when you're proper sad for any reason, make lot's of astaghfar by reciting 'astaghfirullah' alot. And try to work on doing your islamic duties such as salaah (the 5 daily prayers etc.) because these act's of worship may make your heart come back to life insha'Allaah.


If you stay constant in your worship and remain patient, Allaah will open up your heart insha'Allaah, because the first stage of gaining emaan (faith) is by actually submitting yourself to Allaah Almighty. Then on top of that, keep praying alot to Allaah for Him to open up your heart and to allow the light to enter it.

Pray for anything you desire, as long as it's not haraam - and pray for jannah/paradise, read the description of paradise to make yourself gain a desire to enter it, and read about hellfire to see the reality of it - so you don't want to enter it. [Just put your hand over a flame (without touching it) and ask yourself, can i put my finger in this fire for a few seconds? Seriosly, try it and remember that when a person is in the hellfire - it's 70x hotter and a person's whole body is inside of it.]


Realise that every thing that islam has set haraam - there is always an alternative to it, so if a person want's to commit adultery - Allaah has permitted marriage. If a person want's to drink alcohol, Allaah has permitted lot's of other halaal drinks and also in jannah a person will be able to have any drink he/she desires (there'll be a wider range to pick from too!)



You made a really good first step by actually looking for advice instead of just turning away, because there are people who feel emotionless and don't feel guilty - so they keep up with that haraam lifestyle.


So masha'Allaah, may Allaah make the path to jannah/paradise easy for you and all the muslims. May Allaah protect our brothers and sisters, and may we all die in the state of islaam. Ya Allaah, please send eternal peace and blessings upon Your beloved Messenger, his family and all the muslims - ameen.



And when My slaves ask you (O Muhammad SAW) concerning Me, then (answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My Knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me (without any mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and believe in Me, so that they may be led aright. (Qur'an 2:186)




The Prophet (Peace be upon him) said: Allah the Almighty said:


I am as My servant thinks I am (1). I am with him when he makes mention of Me. If he makes mention of Me to himself, I make mention of him to Myself; and if he makes mention of Me in an assembly, I make mention of him in an assemble better than it. And if he draws near to Me an arm's length, I draw near to him a fathom's length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.



(1) Another possible rendering of the Arabic is: "I am as My servant expects Me to be". The meaning is that forgiveness and acceptance of repentance by the Almighty is subject to His servant truly believing that He is forgiving and merciful. However, not to accompany such belief with right action would be to mock the Almighty.


It was related by al-Buhkari (also by Muslim, at-Tirmidhi and Ibn-Majah).​



Allaah Almighty know's best. :) If you got any questions, or never understood what i said - please ask insha'Allaah. jazak Allaahu khayr.



:wasalamex
 
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:salamext:


Alhamdulillah the brother/sister has a really good intention, and therefore we should encourage him/her to repent. Because there is the other alternative - which can be to just give up, but the brother/sister know's that he/she doesn't want to go down that path - so let's help them to do what is right insha'Allaah.


jazak Allaahu khayr :)
 
Does Allah forgive sins without the person feeling remorseful?
Can you ask for forgiveness sincerely without feeling remorseful?

Simple answer... No.

In order to repent... you can't just say sorry. You must regret what you have done... be ashamed by it... must have sincere intentions to never to repeat it again.
 
Question:
I am a young man who is an evildoer (faasiq) and a kaafir. I want to repent to Allaah. I used to do all kinds of haraam actions, and I do not pray. But now I want to repent. I hope the Shaykh can tell me how to repent.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

“Say: “O ‘Ibaadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allaah, verily, Allaah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

And turn in repentance and in obedience with true Faith (Islamic Monotheism) to your Lord and submit to Him (in Islam) before the torment comes upon you, (and) then you will not be helped.

And follow the best of that which is sent down to you from your Lord (i.e. this Qur’aan, do what it orders you to do and keep away from what it forbids), before the torment comes on you suddenly while you perceive not!’”

[al-Zumar 39:53-54 – interpretation of the meaning]

I have received your letter and I was impressed with your eagerness to repent and come back to Allaah, despite the fact that you have committed all kinds of haraam actions, as you say, above all neglecting prayer. It is very important that you should know that the gate of repentance is open to you. You should think deeply about what is mentioned in the aayahs quoted above. I will also tell you some practical steps which will show you clearly how to repent, in sha Allah.

The word tawbah (repentance) is a great word with deep meaning. It is not, as many people think, merely words to be uttered whilst persisting in sin. Think about what Allaah says:

“Seek the forgiveness of your Lord, and turn to Him in repentance”

[Hood 11:3 – interpretation of the meaning]

You will see that repentance is something more than seeking forgiveness.

Because this is a serious matter, there have to be conditions attached. The scholars mentioned the conditions of repentance, based on aayahs from the Qur’aan and ahaadeeth. There follows a list of some of them:

1 – Giving up the sin immediately.

2 – Regretting what has happened in the past.

3 – Resolving not to go back to it.

4 – Making amends to those whom you have wronged, or asking for their forgiveness.

You should not forget other important matters connected to sincere repentance, such as:

1 – You should give up the sin for the sake of Allaah and not for any other reason such as not being able to do it or repeat it, or being afraid of what people will say, for example.

The person who gives up a sin because it may affect his standing or reputation among people, or because it may cost him his job, cannot be described as having repented.

The person who gives up sins for the sake of his health and strength cannot be described as having repented, such as a person who gives up zinaa (adultery) and immoral actions for fear of contagious deadly diseases, or for fear that they may weaken his body and his memory.

The person who refrains from taking a bribe for fear that it may be being offered by undercover officers cannot be described as having repented.

The person who gives up drinking alcohol and taking drugs because he has become bankrupt cannot be described as having repented.

Similarly, the person who is unable to commit sin because of something that lies beyond his control cannot be described as having repented, such as a liar who becomes paralyzed and loses the power of speech, or an adulterer who loses the ability to engage in intercourse, or a thief who has an accident and loses his limbs. In such cases, a person has to feel regret and stop wishing to commit sin, or he has to feel sorry for what has happened in the past. To someone like this the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Regret is repentance.” (narrated by Ahmad and Ibn Maajah; Saheeh al-Jaami’, 6802)

2 – He should feel repelled by the sin and the harm it causes.

This means that sincere repentance cannot be accompanied by feelings of enjoyment and pleasure when remembering past sins, or wishing to go back to it in the future.

In his book al-Daa’ wa’l-Dawaa’ wa’l-Fawaa’id, Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) mentioned many of the harmful effects of sin, including the following:

Being deprived of (Islamic) knowledge – feelings of alienation in the heart – difficulties – physical weakness – being unable to do acts of worship – being deprived of blessings – less help from Allaah – anxiety – more bad deeds – getting used to sin – the sinner becomes insignificant in the sight of Allaah – he becomes insignificant in the sight of people – the curse of the animals will be upon him – he will bear marks of humiliation – his heart will be sealed and he will come under the curse (of Allaah) – his du’aa’ will not be answered – cause of mischief on land and sea – loss of gheerah (protective jealousy) – loss of modesty – the blessings of Allaah will disappear – punishment will befall him – terror in the heart of the sinner – falling into the clutches of the Shaytaan – a bad end – punishment in the Hereafter.

Knowing these harmful effects of sin will make you want to keep away from sin altogether, but some people may move from one sin to another for a number of reasons, including the following:

- They think that it is less serious

- The self is more inclined towards it and the desire for it is stronger

- It is easier to commit this sin than others, unlike sins which require some preparation; the means of doing it are readily available and widespread

- His friends and companions are committing this sin and it is difficult for him to differ from them

- A particular sin may give a person some status among his companions, and it is too difficult for him to lose this position, so he continues to commit that sin.

3 – He should hasten to repent. Hence delaying repentance is in and of itself a sin for which repentance is required.

4 – You should make up the duties towards Allaah that you have missed, if that is possible, such as paying the zakaah which you withheld in the past; and because this is something which is the right of the poor.

5 – You should keep away from places of sin if your being there may make you fall into sin again.

6 – You should keep away from those who helped you to commit sin.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Friends on that Day will be foes one to another except Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)”

[al-Zukhruf 43:67]

Bad friends will curse one another on the Day of Resurrection, so you should keep away from them and break off your friendship with them, and warn others against them if you are not able to call them (to Allaah). Do nt let the Shaytaan deceive you or make the idea of going back to them in order to call them to Allaah look attractive to you, for you know that you are weak and will not be able to resist.

There are many cases in which people have gone back to sin because they resumed relationships with their former companions.

7 – Destroy haraam things that you may have in your possession, such as intoxicants, musical instruments, haraam pictures and movies, permissive stories, statues and so on. They should be broken, destroyed or burnt.

It is very essential that the one who wants to repent should rid himself of all items of jaahiliyyah. How often has it happened that keeping these haraam things caused people who had repented to go back on their repentance and be led astray after having been guided. We ask Allaah to make us steadfast.

8 – Choose righteous friends who will help you against your nafs (self) and who will be an alternative to bad company. Strive to attend circles of dhikr and gatherings of knowledge. Fill your time with beneficial things so that the Shaytaan will not find any opportunity to remind you of the past.

9 – Focus on your body which has been fed on haraam substances and direct its energies towards obeying Allaah. Seek out halaal substances with which to nourish your body so that your flesh will be renewed with halaal substances.

10 – Do a lot of good deeds, for good deeds cancel out bad deeds.

If you are sincere in your repentance to Allaah, then receive the good news that all your previous evil deeds will be changed into good deeds. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And those who invoke not any other ilaah (god) along with Allaah, nor kill such person as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse and whoever does this shall receive the punishment.

The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace;

Except those who repent and believe (in Islamic Monotheism), and do righteous deeds; for those, Allaah will change their sins into good deeds, and Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful”

[al-Furqaan 25:68]

I ask Allaah to benefit you by these words, and to guide your heart. Now get up and utter the Shahaadatyan, purify yourself (with ghusl) and pray as Allaah has commanded you. Observe the Islamic duties regularly and give up haraam things. I will be happy to help you in any way.

I ask Allaah to give us and you strength to do that which He loves and is pleased with. May He accept the repentance of us all, for He is the One Who accepts repentance, the Most Merciful.

Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid
 
So the question remains:

If you should feel sorry about something, but you don't ... what do you do about it?
 
:sl: brothers and sisters.
jazakallahu khair. and thanks glo.

im realy trying to feel bad. i think allah has granted me the regret. however, now im just curous if its accepted. i don't know if shaytaan telling me that im not regretful, beacuse i've been htinking it over in my head, and it also dosn't make sense to me. i mean i really want to be good. i feel bad, because i dont feel bad. sounds weird, i know and i beleive in la ilah ilala muhammad (salalahu aleyh wa salam) rasoololah.


anoher qn about despair. if one despairs, are they only kaafir if they die that way . i mean if one despairs or they are on their way
to, does that make them go out of the pale of islam, or is it only if they die in that state, as opposed to realising that Allah forgives all sins and change their bad ways.

jazakallahu khair
:sl:
 
Being in despair is considered a sin??? :?
(How to make somebody in need feel even worse about him/herself ...! :uuh: )

I suppose it's sign of unbelief, huh? :(
 
Yeh tru glo its like saying ur not pleased with God n that when He's always with you. U get me?
 
What do u despair about?

:sl: brothers and sisters

what do i despair about? hmm.... good question? i guess im worried about the sins taht i have done, and need to repent, but i just can't seem to fully submit. i feel sad about what awaits me.

im worred cos the other day i read something and i said a statement which may be considered as kufr, and this is hte thing i am not feeling bad about. but the thing is, i was confused about what I read, and in one wy it feels like i have committed kufr, on the other hand it feels that the only reason i said it, was out of confusion, not rebelion. i made istikhara prayer about whther or not i should perform the ghusl, and i was inclined to yes. however, i didn't consult anyone about the problem, but i was still inclined to yes. do you know if this is possible: to have an inclination towards something, before consulting anyone about what to do.

anyways, jazakallahu khair
:sl:
 
:salamext:


I think you've experienced this because when a person repeatedly does a sin, they gradually get used to it and their heart get's covered in darkness. You don't realise the difference between right and wrong because you don't actually regret it in your heart.

That's the consequence of repeated sins.


What you need to do is hide your sin from others first of all, and keep it between yourself and Allaah. Then make the repentance anyway and ask Allaah to forgive you - especially in moments when you're proper sad for any reason, make lot's of astaghfar by reciting 'astaghfirullah' alot. And try to work on doing your islamic duties such as salaah (the 5 daily prayers etc.) because these act's of worship may make your heart come back to life insha'Allaah.


If you stay constant in your worship and remain patient, Allaah will open up your heart insha'Allaah, because the first stage of gaining emaan (faith) is by actually submitting yourself to Allaah Almighty. Then on top of that, keep praying alot to Allaah for Him to open up your heart and to allow the light to enter it.

Pray for anything you desire, as long as it's not haraam - and pray for jannah/paradise, read the description of paradise to make yourself gain a desire to enter it, and read about hellfire to see the reality of it - so you don't want to enter it. [Just put your hand over a flame (without touching it) and ask yourself, can i put my finger in this fire for a few seconds? Seriosly, try it and remember that when a person is in the hellfire - it's 70x hotter and a person's whole body is inside of it.]


Realise that every thing that islam has set haraam - there is always an alternative to it, so if a person want's to commit adultery - Allaah has permitted marriage. If a person want's to drink alcohol, Allaah has permitted lot's of other halaal drinks and also in jannah a person will be able to have any drink he/she desires (there'll be a wider range to pick from too!)



You made a really good first step by actually looking for advice instead of just turning away, because there are people who feel emotionless and don't feel guilty - so they keep up with that haraam lifestyle.


So masha'Allaah, may Allaah make the path to jannah/paradise easy for you and all the muslims. May Allaah protect our brothers and sisters, and may we all die in the state of islaam. Ya Allaah, please send eternal peace and blessings upon Your beloved Messenger, his family and all the muslims - ameen.
And when My slaves ask you (O Muhammad SAW) concerning Me, then (answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My Knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me (without any mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and believe in Me, so that they may be led aright. (Qur'an 2:186)

The Prophet (Peace be upon him) said: Allah the Almighty said:


I am as My servant thinks I am (1). I am with him when he makes mention of Me. If he makes mention of Me to himself, I make mention of him to Myself; and if he makes mention of Me in an assembly, I make mention of him in an assemble better than it. And if he draws near to Me an arm's length, I draw near to him a fathom's length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.



(1) Another possible rendering of the Arabic is: "I am as My servant expects Me to be". The meaning is that forgiveness and acceptance of repentance by the Almighty is subject to His servant truly believing that He is forgiving and merciful. However, not to accompany such belief with right action would be to mock the Almighty.


It was related by al-Buhkari (also by Muslim, at-Tirmidhi and Ibn-Majah).​
Allaah Almighty know's best. :) If you got any questions, or never understood what i said - please ask inshah. jazak Allaahu khayr.



:wasalamex
:sl: brothers and sisters.

brother, jazakallahu khair for your response. but i don't repeatidly commit this sin.
:sl:
 
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:sl:

Yeh you have an inclination when you do Istikarah, people say (and you should do this) that you should do whatever signs you see after performing Istikarah. May Allah swt help you and make it easy for you Insha'Allah.

:w:
 
:salamext:

there was a sahih hadith of rasullulah saws in which he stated:

SAHIH BUKHARI

Volume 4, Book 56, Number 676:
Narrated Abu Said Al-Khudri:

The Prophet said, "Amongst the men of Bani Israel there was a man who had murdered ninety-nine persons. Then he set out asking (whether his repentance could be accepted or not). He came upon a monk and asked him if his repentance could be accepted. The monk replied in the negative and so the man killed him. He kept on asking till a man advised to go to such and such village. (So he left for it) but death overtook him on the way. While dying, he turned his chest towards that village (where he had hoped his repentance would be accepted), and so the angels of mercy and the angels of punishment quarrelled amongst themselves regarding him. Allah ordered the village (towards which he was going) to come closer to him, and ordered the village (whence he had come), to go far away, and then He ordered the angels to measure the distances between his body and the two villages. So he was found to be one span closer to the village (he was going to). So he was forgiven."


^ that is how great ALlahs forgiveness is, a man ADDICTED TO KILLING, didnt even fully repent and was still forgiven.
I hope that answers your question :)

:wasalamex
 

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