so confused!

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:sl:

I've been looking for a husband for a while now and just recently I found a brother who seemed perfect for me. He was friendly and talked to me but he never mentioned he wanted to get married. I was just investigating his personality because my mum liked him for me. But now he seems to have done a disappearing act. I've seen him once but we never spoke and I've only talked to him via email. He hasn't replied to my last one and I think I may have....I don't know...scared him off or something. I think I did a little too much investigating. Now I don't know what to do! :(

plz help

wasalaam
 
:sl:

Give up? Find another man?

Or you could stand your ground and ask what the hell's wrong with him. But seeing as he didn't reply to your mail, you probably did scare him off. But to not seem desperate, I suggest you give up on that man, who I think is a coward.

You don't want to marry a coward now, do you?

:w:
 
:sl:

this may sound dumb but did he know before hand you were talking to him for marriage?
 
:sl: sis

the best advice i can give you is pray to allah that he will find you a good muslim brother to marry. its hard but we should always be content with what happiness allah gives us as what he chooses is better than what we choose. maybe that brother isnt rite for you, allah knows best.

good look with ur hubby hunting :D
 
:sl:

I've been looking for a husband for a while now and just recently I found a brother who seemed perfect for me. He was friendly and talked to me but he never mentioned he wanted to get married. I was just investigating his personality because my mum liked him for me. But now he seems to have done a disappearing act. I've seen him once but we never spoke and I've only talked to him via email. He hasn't replied to my last one and I think I may have....I don't know...scared him off or something. I think I did a little too much investigating. Now I don't know what to do! :(

plz help

wasalaam


Ukhtee are you saying you spoke to the brother yet their was no intention of marriage?

I think firstly its important that if and when you do speak to a brother, you do within reason and necessity. If the reason was marriage then that needed to be stated right from the onset usually by a mahram, so that your talking has purpose and it Inshaa'Allaah serves towards an honourable thing.

Yes perhaps, the brother thought that from your end, you were considering marriage...and maybe from his end he wasn't. Why did he talk to you?

Or it could just be that he is busy or something??

Allaah knows best and I pray you find a brother who is good for you in this life and the aakhirah-aameen
 
no the brother didn't know about the whole marriage intention. I wanted to know what he was like before my parents approached his. I should have just left it. But my parents are going to see his next week at an event so all will be decided there. He contacted me first. He was just asking where I live because he is friends with my brother so I answered it...and it just sort of carried on from there. But I never mentioned marriage. Maybe I should have.
 

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