cottonrainbow
Well-known member
- Messages
- 71
- Reaction score
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- Gender
- Female
- Religion
- Islam
Assalamu alaikum brothers and sisters!
where do I begin... So, to give a little background, I am American. I was born into a heavily Southern Christian family.I was first introduced to Islam at age 12 by a friend of my oldest sister. He gave me my very first Quran! I would read the Quaran and sleep with it under my pillow until one night I had a really horrible dream, and I was afraid that God wasn't pleased with me reading the Quran, so I stopped reading it and went back to reading the Bible.
So fast forward almost twenty years and now Allah has called me to HIM and I answered by becoming a Muslimah! It was a very private decision, and I really did not seek advice from friends and family (knowing they'd try to talk me out of it). Honestly, besides learning the Surahs, the transition was really easy. Hijabing seemed really natural; I actually welcomed it!
Since becoming a Muslim, I have found myself in another place that I did not expect. Allah has blessed me with many good things, and I am forever greatful to HIM, alhamdulilah! The bad part is that I have lost every female friend that I have had for years now: college buddies, work friends, friends I grew up with. I am literally like very lonely except for my immediate family. Even my coworkers all had something bad to say. One lady coworker comes up to me and says, "You are not a Muslim, you are a saintified holy Christian! And beside, you look oppressed with that thing on your head and all covered up. You should know better." My supposed best friend just had a birthday last week. She didn't invite me. Actually she hasn't spoken to me in about three weeks. She did post Facebook pics of her and some other girls going out and having a good time. I'm kinda hurt even though I don't go clubbing that she didn't even mention it to me or share any part of her moment with me and she calls me her bestie?
My neighbor for almost 7 years does not talk to me anymore as well. It has been a year now and nothing. her daughter and my daughter were best friends, but now they actively avoid us. I even had a small party at my house and invited her. She told me that she would come, but never showed up.
My other friend, who is a Muslimah, rarely speaks to me but I'm okay with it because she did some things to try to cause me to end my marriage with my husband. This lady is wayyy older than me, so I was really hurt for a moment because she was the first person to assist me when I reverted to Islam. She became distant and would not give me any advice.
Honestly, I don't know what's going on. I'm not a mean or arrogant person, and I always try to be helpful, tactful, and pleasant.
My distant family (cousins, aunts, etc.) I do tend to avoid them because they always want to get into arguments with me about Islam v/s Christianity. I am leary about visiting my family for Thanksgiving because last year, one of my cousins came to me and said something very rude about what she thinks about Muslims. Plus, I can't trust the food because it's filled with pork! maybe the macaroni doesn't have pork lol.;D
Honestly, I don't get what the big deal is. It's too much to even put into words.
My husband thinks its jealousy and he prays for me all the time because I've gone through a lot, but I know that I can't depend on him to be my best friend. I would like to have female Muslim friends, inshallah.
where do I begin... So, to give a little background, I am American. I was born into a heavily Southern Christian family.I was first introduced to Islam at age 12 by a friend of my oldest sister. He gave me my very first Quran! I would read the Quaran and sleep with it under my pillow until one night I had a really horrible dream, and I was afraid that God wasn't pleased with me reading the Quran, so I stopped reading it and went back to reading the Bible.
So fast forward almost twenty years and now Allah has called me to HIM and I answered by becoming a Muslimah! It was a very private decision, and I really did not seek advice from friends and family (knowing they'd try to talk me out of it). Honestly, besides learning the Surahs, the transition was really easy. Hijabing seemed really natural; I actually welcomed it!
Since becoming a Muslim, I have found myself in another place that I did not expect. Allah has blessed me with many good things, and I am forever greatful to HIM, alhamdulilah! The bad part is that I have lost every female friend that I have had for years now: college buddies, work friends, friends I grew up with. I am literally like very lonely except for my immediate family. Even my coworkers all had something bad to say. One lady coworker comes up to me and says, "You are not a Muslim, you are a saintified holy Christian! And beside, you look oppressed with that thing on your head and all covered up. You should know better." My supposed best friend just had a birthday last week. She didn't invite me. Actually she hasn't spoken to me in about three weeks. She did post Facebook pics of her and some other girls going out and having a good time. I'm kinda hurt even though I don't go clubbing that she didn't even mention it to me or share any part of her moment with me and she calls me her bestie?
My neighbor for almost 7 years does not talk to me anymore as well. It has been a year now and nothing. her daughter and my daughter were best friends, but now they actively avoid us. I even had a small party at my house and invited her. She told me that she would come, but never showed up.
My other friend, who is a Muslimah, rarely speaks to me but I'm okay with it because she did some things to try to cause me to end my marriage with my husband. This lady is wayyy older than me, so I was really hurt for a moment because she was the first person to assist me when I reverted to Islam. She became distant and would not give me any advice.
Honestly, I don't know what's going on. I'm not a mean or arrogant person, and I always try to be helpful, tactful, and pleasant.
My distant family (cousins, aunts, etc.) I do tend to avoid them because they always want to get into arguments with me about Islam v/s Christianity. I am leary about visiting my family for Thanksgiving because last year, one of my cousins came to me and said something very rude about what she thinks about Muslims. Plus, I can't trust the food because it's filled with pork! maybe the macaroni doesn't have pork lol.;D
Honestly, I don't get what the big deal is. It's too much to even put into words.
My husband thinks its jealousy and he prays for me all the time because I've gone through a lot, but I know that I can't depend on him to be my best friend. I would like to have female Muslim friends, inshallah.
I have one friend and she lives far so I cannot visit much,lol, and when it comes to family, I'm not allowed to go visit my own father (brother lives with him and he doesn't like me coming around). The way I see it, it's better to be alone than in bad company. Perhaps the friendships you once had will bring no benefit to you imaan, Allah knows best. In many cases having a large social circle takes attention away from Allah and your deen. It may be difficult at first to deal with the rejection, but it is through difficulties that we learn to appreciate ease right? 
dear sister 
