the pink bipolar elephant in my life.

[t.jack]

with all the stigma attached to mental illness shoud i let a man i plan to marry know (im not getn married again anytime soon). i have already divorced one husband 5 months ago *who i never told about my bipolar* -- i want to get married again in the next one to one and a half year. but my lips have a hard time forming the words to tell anyone. no one except 1 realitive knows.



i have been told by other brothers and sisters thro whispers that so and so brother or so and so sister is bi polar (without them knowing of my condition) and you should not marry them. i rather people think im just strange than to have those wispers going around about me.

in my mind i belive that if ALLAH wanted me to tell that person i was going to marry my lips could of and would of formed the words to say so. but i tried multiple times and couldnt. i dont take medicine for my condition i just try to take a holistic approach and eat proper foods to aid my body.

i want to be 100% honest with the person im going to marry it is affecting me wanting to stop wearing my hijab cuz i feels like a total fake. (which techinally i am cuz it depends on which bipolar trip im on) but alhamdillah

please serious advice
*forgive me if i posted in wrong thread*


salam alikum

 

[~Zaria~]

:wasalam:

i want to be 100% honest with the person im going to marry

^ And so you should sister, in shaa Allah.

It is only fair towards the person who is desirous of spending his life with you, that he should be aware of a condition that will most certainly affect his life in some way as well.

This would apply to any serious and chronic condition - be it cancer/ HIV/ neurological problems, etc.

I think we would all expect the same from our spouses in shaa Allah.
So shouldnt we deal with others in the same way, that we would like to be dealt with?

My sister, you should always bear in mind that whatever happens in life - it is ONLY by the decree of Allah (subhanawataála).

Do you TRUST in the plans of Allah?
That He can make anything possible, for His bounties are completely limitless.

So, this is no small matter for him.
If He so decrees, then He will make marriage a reality for you.....despite any obstacles that you may face.

Please read the following story: http://www.saudigazette.com.sa/index.cfm?method=home.regcon&contentID=2010021863786

of brother Abdullah Banimah who found love and marriage despite being quadriplegic (paralyzed from the neck down).
SubhanAllah!

Allah (subhanawataála) reminds us in His glorius book:

Say, “Nothing will happen to us except what Allah has decreed for us;
He is our Protector.”
And in Allah let the believers put their trust. (translation Surat Tawbah 9:51)


So turn to Allah in sincere duaa, and have complete trust in His plans for you.


May Allah Taa'la ease your situation and grant you the best in both the worlds.
Ameen