Too good?

[anonymous]

Im really nervous posting this. But is there such thing as someone being too good for you (marriage). Is it possible not to deserve someone? Your thoughts. bah i just dont think im really cut out for marriage anyway

 

[*charisma*]

Assalamu Alaikum

I'm not sure of the entire situation here, but from what you wrote I can just say in general that honestly my personal opinion is that this is something you have to decide upon yourself. If you want someone who is better than you through akhlaq/iman/adab (character/faith/mannerism), who you know will encourage you to be a better person and will allow you to improve your personal flaws, then that is a good person for you and there is nothing wrong with being with someone like that if you have those kinds of intentions...not to mention if this person accepts you as you are and is willing to hold your hand through out the way and not hold himself above you, then you're getting something that is very rare and I think you should treasure it and accept it as a blessing.

fi aman allah
w'salaam

 

[Muhaba]

well if you didn't deserve it then Allah wouldn't have given it to you right? so if you got it then obviously in Allah's sight you deserved it and who knows better than Allah? noone!

so be happy with what you got. and thank Allah for being kind to you.

 

[Hamza Asadullah]

Im really nervous posting this. But is there such thing as someone being too good for you (marriage). Is it possible not to deserve someone? Your thoughts. bah i just dont think im really cut out for marriage anyway

Asalaamu Alaikum, i think it is a good thing to be humble in that you think yourself as being not as good as other people whereas it is not a good thing to think of yourself as better than others. But a balance should be struck between the two otherwise shaythan will make you feel like your completley worthless and these are negative feelings.

It may have been an experience you had or someone close to you which has lowered your confidence and self esteem in someway but the best we can do is learn from the past and from other peoples experiences and take lessons from it for the past and lifes experiences has made us who we are today. We should learn from the past so that we can make the best of now and the future and do things and think in a better way but we should try not let the past effect us negatively.

Rasulallah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) has given us the best criterea to look for in a partner and so as long as we are attracted to the person and like their deen and character then one should consult with parents and make isthikhara and take it from there. Whatever is best will happen and if that person is decreed for you then no one will be able to stop you from marrying them.

You should not lose hope in that you will not find a suitable partner but you should trust in Allah and ask of him and he will do what is bet for you in terms of finding th right partner. Be humble but also do not look at yourself as being too low but keep a good balance between the two extremes.

Do not let any experience you or anyone else has had with regards to finding a partner or marriage affect your self esteem or confidence in finding a suitable partner for marriage. For marriage is a beautiful thing and is the sunnah of Rasulallah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) and once Allah has found you the right partner then you will think "Why did i ever feel that way in the first place?".

I pray whatever happens for you happens for the best and may Allah grant you the best of this world and the next. Ameen

And Allah knows best in all matters