إسلام عليكم
May Allah forgive me because I cannot properly give an answer to what you seek. I hope you can forgive me if I am being bold and saying what I feel. It's sad to hear that you say you are weakening in faith.
I read so many different posts on different topics and the knowledge and wisdom of some of the brothers and sisters here is amazing. I also have no teacher, imam or anyone at all to discuss these things with me. So i am baby stepping my way through it all.
Your posts are, to me, a very valuable source of insight and learning. I don't know how that can help you with your struggles, but I wanted to let you know that. Your tests are big and your life isn't easy. But still, i feel you should know that Allah has given you something that you are sharing with others, whether you realized it or not. Yes, I see what you write as another source of inspiration.
I thank you for all the posts you've written that have made me stop and think; have led me to research more; taught me something new.
I pray Allah will guide you to the people you can also learn from. I pray that you will hear the quran with your heart always. I pray Allah gives you strength, motivation and eases your load. I pray you will find your faith growing faster and stronger and I pray you will come out of the gray soon.
