What to do now?

[Studentofdeed]

So I want to know if there is something wrong with me if I feel hatred and anger towards someone's family. The person who wronged me was gone and no longer do I suffer from them alhamdullah but at the same time their family covered for them and their tracts despite the wrong the person did. Now all i get are awkward salaams and looks at each other. Most often I try to avoid them as much as possible. I'm trying to understand that isnt what they did estially bad? Many of them give this public image of being literally the best muslim yet in reality I know they are different from what they project. Yet people still like them. I see one member who started coming to the mosque, he is giving charity and praying jummah and all that. Its obvious that what he is doing are good things and allah to some extent is guiding him so I feel like there is something wrong with me for disliking him. When someone is trying to be a good muslim , I feel and love that person for the sake of Allah but this person, it's so hard because he covered for his family member who terrorized me. When I was slandered and humiliated in such a degree and bullied in the school where I became paranoid and couldn't sleep, I went insane. I feel like he and his family are responsible for what his child did and full aware of it. I have forgivine this person family besides the perpetrator so dont tell me to forgive. My point I'm trying to illustrate is why do I feel disgust still? Am I sinning or do I have the right to feel upset?

 

[BeTheChange]

Asalamualykum

Donald Trump gets lots of 'likes' on his social media and he has millions of followers. That doesn't mean he is on the right path. Also one can also question the reliability of these figures or whether they are falsely generated. We are living in a fake world with the people who love fakery can thrive and deceive and present an illusion to the world.

Protect yourself and protect your emaan. Don't get tangled in this mess who is good and who is bad. This division is too simple. Humans are complex creatures. There is good and bad in everyone. Focus on yourself and then your family, then your neighbour's and then your community. Insha Allah. Don't let the situation or your bullies win by allowing them to mould you in a negative way. Use your hurt in a positive way and build your character.

Give your heart to Allah swt and you won't be disappointed. Insha Allah. This world is designed to break your heart.

 

[Musa Muhd]

It is hard not to be upset towards people who have wronged you, but if you can keep your thoughts to yourself, there is no sin upon you.


Abu Hurayrah RA narrated that the Prophet PBUH said: “Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, will forgive my ummah for whatever crosses their minds so long as they do not act upon it or speak of it.” [Al-Bukhaari 5269] [Muslim 127]

 

[Studentofdeed]

Jazakallah khayran. I just feel bad for disliking them and it makes me even more confused when I see them making this image that they are good people. I forgave them but I will not forgive their child because I'm still haunted and still feel the effects of their abuse. All I can say is Alhamdullah Allah saved me from them. Alhamdullah

 

[Eric H]

Greetings and peace be with you Studentofdeed;

do I have the right to feel upset?

This person hurt you in the past, so it should be over; but you are giving them permission to continue hurting you. It is like you have given them a remote control, and every time they push the buttons, you feel bad, they could be a thousand miles away, and they are still controlling your feelings; because you are still giving them permission to hurt you.

I just feel bad for disliking them

Because Allah gave you a conscience, you are a kind and caring person, and when you feel upset and angry, you cannot be that kind and caring person that Allah created you to be.

but I will not forgive their child because I'm still haunted and still feel the effects of their abuse.

You are hurting yourself, you are not hurting them, by having these feelings. My story might help you.

I believe I was unfairly sacked in 2011 from a job I had been doing for ten years. I never had a day of sick, I did a lot of jobs other people seemed afraid to do, caring for people with challenging behaviour. A colleague I had been working with for a few years, witnessed an event that would have helped my defence, she said she would write a witness statement for me. But the manager told her she should not write this statement; so she didn’t. This lady died unexpectedly a couple of months later, my prayers were that I have forgiven her, and that God also forgives her.

Since being sacked; I have done about two thousand hours of voluntary work for the people who sacked me. On occasions, I come into contact with the people responsible for my sacking, I pray that God will bless them and give them peace.

It has been easier for me to do two thousand hours of voluntary work, rather than to hold onto any anger and hate I could have for them. I know this to be true; because in the past I have lived with real anger; I know how it has made me feel; it eats away at the soul and makes you feel miserable. I am determined that I will not be controlled by anger; I just don’t have the time or energy for those emotions any more.

In the spirit of praying for a peace that surpasses all understanding,
Eric

 

[Studentofdeed]

Jazakallah khayran. Thank you again. It has gotten bit easier . Please keep me in your duas that Allah Grant's us all paradise