What to do when facing evil

[Imraan]

Assalam Walaikum

me and my wife seperated in May 2018, she has custody of our 2 year old daughter, I (soleley me) am on the cusp of getting a court order to have contact with my daughter to start at a very basic level and then insh Allah progressing on to lengthier stays with me. However my family members have no chance on seeing my daughter until I am able to have her for a few hours at least. In time my family will be able to meet and build a bond with her insh Allah.

One of my distant relatives will be getting married in the next few months and we are obliged to attend to honour the invite.

The dilemma is, the family know my ex's family and im pretty sure they will be invited too. Knowing my ex's family they will bring my child and flaunt her in front of me, my immediate family members and my relatives. It's not going to be nice.

I've already had to deal with the ex in the court case and their legal positions in an attempt to oppress me and deprive me of my daughter, yeah they have won a load of points... it all happened with Allah's will though.

I hate being oppressed and people doing evil acts. Its obvious, who doesn't hate it.

My patience is being tested to its limits and has been for a while..... what do I do, i pray everyday and always ask people (who know of my calamity) that I encounter in my daily life to pray for me too.

I feel like i'm worth a small atom of my own human self just out there to be bullied and oppressed.

I do not want to lose interest in my daughter (although thats what my ex's family might be aiming for), poeple are known to abandon the non custodial kids because they just can't hack this kind of rubbish. I mean, why would you fight a battle you have no chance of winning? Kids stay with their mother, the mother is the be all and end all, our religion says it too, but to deprive the father too.... come on people can't have their cake and eat it too can they? when does this end?

Can anyone make any suggestions and / or specific dua's (i already have been reciting daily the dua from Sahih Muslim 2166, "Innalillahi wa inna ilaihi rajiun. Allahumma ajurni fi musibati wa akhlifli khayran minha." for the past one year).

As always my beleiving and practising brothers and sisters, please sincerely remember me in your prayers and may Allah swt reward you all for your efforts and for looking out for me for surely I am on trial and being tested repeatedly in many aspects of my life. We don't know eachother, but i'll humbly appreciate your dua'z nonetheless.

jazak Allah

 

[*charisma*]

Assalamu Alaikum

I can only say that you're all adults and you should all be able to act in a civilized manner while around each other. I know you are hurting, but you shouldn't worry about something that has not yet happened. Don't give up on your daughter. She may not understand what is going on right now, but as she gets older she will want to have you around and will ask about you. Every girl needs her father. There's nothing like his love, so please don't feel discouraged that you will not be wanted/rejected. You need to show that you are present even if you are not physically there. You should try to get some rights to be able to see her. It's not fair that you are being separated from her, but I guess this is your test right now. May Allah rectify your affairs and grant you patience ameen. Remember that whatever is not granted to you in this world will be rewarded to you tenfolds in another manner. Allah hears you and must love you for not answering your du'as right away. There is something being built for you beyond imagination because of this. I hope you do not lose sight of the bigger picture.

 

[Iceee]

Salaam brother.

I really hope your situation gets better.

I make dua that everything gets easier with time and patience.

I know your situation is unfortunate, please strive and fight in court to be in your daughter's life. She will need you.

May Allah make it easier for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers bro. Imrann

 

[Ahmed.]

Brother the remedy for now is to be patient . You need an awful lot of that throughout your court saga.

I think a good long term remedy for you will be to get married again and have more children . In this way you will be able to deal with your loss of your daughter better.

The important thing is to make sure as much as possible your daughter gets a good Islamic upbringing so communicate this wish of yours to your ex and her family

The loss or lack of personal interaction with your daughter will in time heal, especially if you 'compensate' yourself with more children.

 

[Imraan]

Jazak Allah to all for the replies. I appreciate the suggestions and responses, it does definetely move me towards the light.. Alhamdulillah. I pray everyday things get better insh Allah.

I guess it might be something to do with a heavy conscience, the thought itself of having enemies really does drive me crazy.. makes me feel uneasy. Who wants enemies...??? There are people out there who thrive on the idea of having enemies.. it's their talking point. I just happened to cross paths with these kind of people, hence why I'm where I am at now.

The final hearing for court is on the 12th September so il be walking out with an order, only matter of time until I am reunited with the little one. Hope things progress to plan, I dont want to have to go to court again.

X

 

[Mandy]

I hope things get better for you. Parents should never be prevented from seeing their children (unless they are evil and a bad or danger to the child of course).
Do not give up, I am sure you can show your interest in your daughter and get legal rights to see her.

As for the wedding in your family, do not worry about what might happen. It has not yet happen and you might be pleasantly surprised. Time heals wounds and your ex wife might no longer feels she needs to hurt you.
Also, during a wedding, what will they do? Tell your daughter to sit in a corner and not to talk with you? Show her around telling you that "you can't talk to her"? If she ever did something so bad, I imagine that people there would judge your ex actions harshly and she would feel the shame of her actions.

In any case, the wedding might actually be a good opportunity for you to see your daughter and maybe even get a mutual understanding with your ex. Just be careful not to be perceived by other at the wedding as being the one that is behaving badly. Stay respectful of your ex and her family. Do not try to steer your daughter away from them. (It might hurt your goal.) Just be there for your daughter.


I will add you to my duas. Allah willing, may your family get to a better place as time goes by.