why does allah do the exact opposite of what i ask for ?

[fay13]

I've been suicidal lately and have been planning to kill myself using CO2 so today i prayed for my day just to get a little bit better nothing less more that is all i asked for , just for my day to get even worse and make my mood even more suicidal , does Allah want me to kill myself? isn't committing suicide haram in Islam? why doesn't Allah have mercy on us?

 

[Eric H]

Greetings and peace be with you fay; and welcome to the forum;

I've been suicidal lately

I am so sorry to hear about your pain; but suicide is a permenant solution to a temporary problem. The terrible dilemna you face is; you want the pain to stop; but you don't know how to stop the pain. You don't really want to die; but you are not sure of any other solution. But the truth is; suicide does not stop the pain; it passes it onto a hundred more people; who then carry your pain for you.

why doesn't Allah have mercy on us?

The first name of Allah's 99 names.

1 الرَّحْمَنُ Ar-Rahman The Beneficent He who wills goodness and mercy for all His creatures. ( Including You.)

Are you able to say anything more about the things that trouble you; I am sure the sisters and brothers here will have words of comfort and encouragement for you.

May Allah bless you and ease your pain as you journey through life.
Eric

 

[Murid]

Again, very good eloquent words of Eric.

Why should you think about such a grave sin ending of suicide? It will bring a lot of problems to you and many others.

Your posting is a very unusual one, out of my real life experiences. Did not ever met a practicing muslim with such opinions.

Allah/God is the most merciful, above any our comprehension.

What do you want to get from your day?
How old are you?
How should your day look like?

When did start negative opinions?
Do you have friends, a family, a job?
Do you enjoy reading, sports, nature? Something else? Do you have a romantic relationship?

Do you practice deen? Do you know prayers, dhikr, salawat, estegfar, gratitude?

Did you visit a psychiatrist?
If not give a visit right tomorrow.

 

[Eusra Fhaad inshaAllah]

Murid,I do all you mentioned & yet I'm going through a living nightmare about which I shouldn't mention.