I have a problem that many people who are currently my friends said that when they getting to know me for the first time they looked at me a like an arrogant girl !! I don’t know why. Their first expression is always that I am arrogant and don’t like anyone to come closer. Well they are now very nice to me but when we sometimes talking frankly to each other and finding how was the first expression everyone take when she know the others, they always said that I am somehow arrogant.
How can I get rid of this ???
I tried to ask someone else about that who know me closer than my friends so I picked my sister in law and I ask her to answer me very very honestly about her first impression when she meet me for the first time……………….her answer was the same as the others .
One time we were joking around about the same thing, and I asked them what made you feel that I am an arrogant girl. Some of them said:"we might misunderstand you sister, it might be that you are a full confidence, always walking with rising your head up" come on is walking with raising head up has something to do with confidence or arrogance, it is my way to walk I used to it since I was a little child.
I really don’t know how I can solve this problem (If I really has a problem) well I am really confused whether I have one or not. I find my self getting to know the others very easily but………………I don’t know :enough!::enough!:
please help may allah guide you the best
sis, try it - whenever you see any sister - just go for it, smile at her in the face - even if you think she wont smile back (then you can divert your eyes away if you feel shy, but it breaks down a mental barrier and people see you as good.) its sunnah and theres reward in that insha Allah. i used to be shy to do that but now i even do it if i see a brother going by while i'm in the car.. because a smile is free but it gives so much benefit to others.
at the beginning you might feel shy, but this builds your confidence and its nothing to be shy about either - people just start thinking your a good person. the companions would say they never saw anyone smiling as much as the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wasalam). i think it's kool and the smile beautifies people, so your connection with Allah should allow you to be confident because you know you're doing it for His pleasure, so He won't forsake you.
smiling is easier than approaching other people, and that is sufficient for people to know you're not arrogant. because an arrogant person (supposedly) doesn't make the first move. you can do it with your friends, other muslims are your friends too - so work on it from there.. from sisters your close to, to other sisters you dont know..
sometimes the only problem is that some people have faces in which their expression looks slightly grumpy or serious, but by smiling more often - or atleast abit more than before, - people start realising you're a good, flexed out and relaxed person..
pray to Allah to support you.. even in small matters like these. Allah azawajal wil help u follow the sunnah!
Qatada: sis, try it - whenever you see any sister - just go for it, smile at her in the face - even if you think she wont smile back (then you can divert your eyes away if you feel shy, but it breaks down a mental barrier and people see you as good.)
Agreed.
I also want to add something. Sometime ago, I reminded myself to give salam to every sister I pass in the street. Now I'm a shy person who normally finds it hard to make eye-contact. But I so wanted my 10 rewards (the least) that I started to say 'asalam alaikum' to every sister I passed. This really broke the ice and these sisters now ask how I am after we greet each other. It's actually quiet funny cuz when I'm standing outside the school gates and they go past, it's a never ending 'asalam alaikum -wa alaikum asalam' session going on. It makes us all smile and feel closer for the sake of Allah.
I actually have the same problem lol. Loads of people have perhaps either mistaken confidence with arrogance or it was mainly because i joke around way too much. It doesn't matter what people think of you really, ur not intending to sound arrogant so what can u really do about it. I bet u felt really hurt when they said u sounded arrogant, i would.
Anyways, the moral to this post, Who cares if people think you are arrogant..Because your not.
The believer has four characteristics: if he is afflicted by any misfortune, he remains patient and steadfast. If he is given anything, he is grateful. If he speaks , he speaks the truth. If he passes judgment on any issue,he is just .
I actually have the same problem lol. Loads of people have perhaps either mistaken confidence with arrogance or it was mainly because i joke around way too much. It doesn't matter what people think of you really, ur not intending to sound arrogant so what can u really do about it. I bet u felt really hurt when they said u sounded arrogant, i would.
Anyways, the moral to this post, Who cares if people think you are arrogant..Because your not.
Exactly! You should never think too much about what people think of you.
Should I seek a source of law other than God, when it is He Who has sent down unto you the Book (Qur'an) fully explained? And those whom We have given them the Book know that it has been sent down from the Lord with truth, so be not of those in doubt.
Muslimah_sis: jazaki allah khair sis,your advice is more than appreciated may allah reward you al jannah. I will try my best in sha allah.
Brother Qatada:
I think I will try me best to breaks down the mental barrier, but I think it will be somehow diffecult for me since I am a shy person with the strangers. May Allah reward you al jannah in sha allah and jazak allah khair for the advise
format_quote Originally Posted by Mysterious Uk
Anyways, the moral to this post, Who cares if people think you are arrogant..Because your not.
format_quote Originally Posted by Ali.
Exactly! You should never think too much about what people think of you.
jazakum allah khair brother and sister
to be honest with you, sometimes I said the same thing to myself
but the problem is that we are living with those people and we have to build our relation with them properly case we are living in the same world.
Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.
When you create an account, we remember exactly what you've read, so you always come right back where you left off. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and share your thoughts. Sign Up
.
Quote
Hide
Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.
Bookmarks