I feel so bad. This has now been the 3rd or so times that this had happened. There is a brother who lives across the street from us. Several times he physically attacked me, kissed me by force. I tried to push him away, but he tells me that it actually makes him want me even more.
First I met him a couple of months ago, the first day we met he told me that he wants to marry me. I told him that I wasnt just going to marry someone that easily n that it would take time to get to know each other. He kept saying, that he wants to marry me within one week and I told him that I didnt want that. He said that he would come to my father with his father n ask for my hand, I told him not to make a fool out of himself and not to bother coming to my Dad n that I wasnt ready.
The mistake I made is to give him the time of day. He keept calling me and kept asking me to just hear him out. So I gave him a chance to talk. After I slapped him last time when he tried to kiss me, I thought, this time he will have learned his lesson. Well today he did waaay more, he touched me in appropiately, n Kissed some parts of my body, I kept resisting. I told him, as fiercely as I could, to NOT TOUCH ME. He keeps saying, ok, I wont. and Before I know it he's all over me yet again.
The only thing about him that gives me a slight interest are his looks. Shallow I know. This is exactly why I didnt want to jump the marriage bandwagon with him. He's extremely good looking, and I guess he's use to girls being all over him, he cant believe it that I keep avoiding him. He told me that he will never leave me alone until he marries me. He said that I could help by agreeing. That he's obsessed with me. I dont know why I even bothered to see him. I feel soo bad. Moreso of what he did to me. I am a practising Muslimah n I have never been touched by a guy. I dont know how on earth I ended up in this mess.
I feel used n abused. Please help me.
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asc sis
im really sad to hear these kinda stuff it happened to me once and i talked to my best friend and she told me to tell a cuz to beat da **** outta him and i did my cuz got really angry when he heard about it when out da and i was wondering wat he was gonna do so me and my friend followed him and (da guy lives 1 street away)wow it was nasty fight otha boys were tryin 2 back up da guy buh my cuz tuaght him lesson
that was at da begining of summa so me and my fam went on holiday an after we came back he didnt stop and got so serious dat my aunt got suspecous (im **** at spellin ) and asked few questions and in da end it all came.one of mate like da guy so her mum heard rumors saying dat we had fight ova him,her got so pissed at her big bro and he went straight out and got da guy from da netcafe got him down at dey're house we were callled and his parents were called dey're was a big argument and his mum neva belived it cuz she was used to gurls drowlling ova him andi was banneed to go out by myself for da nxt 3 wks buh it all came throw and now im on holiday so when i go back kheir inshallah
anyz enough of my life tym. id say tell ur bro to go bang him and if he still doesnt leave u only den tell ur parents (they will get angry and fink it ur fault but once theyre calm they will fink of somewat inshallah
may allah help u ameen
..... My friends told me that he's planning to come and ask for my hand when we're back. I already told him that he shouldnt....
before taking any major decision like marriage , pl. offer Ishthekhara prayer .
May Allah help u sis always .
Allah is sufficient for us but He did not forbid us about taking pre-cautions . So , when u come back home , don't go out alone . Either go out with ur dad or bro ( without explaining them the reason if u don't want to ) or call ur friend / neighbour .
Keep a mobile phone with u so that u can call police / family members in case of emergency.
Christ will never be proud to reject to be a slave to God .....holy Quran, chapter Women , 4: 172
Raah this thread DRAGGING Blud. Man's only came hear to get some advise & Man's getting insulted and thing. To tha Thread starter...
Salaam Dudette, Me personally thinks...
1) You should just change your dijits, That way yeah you won't getting any pranks blah & oly give it out to your tightest mates
2) Dun't even walk tha way he does, just Spllluuuuuuuurt =D Like just run a mile if you see him
3) I personally think he should get jumped, buh thats just me =( I would tell someone close. You shouldn't have to fear that he'd du something erytime you see him. What an imbecile. Eurgh.
4) Its not your fault that he's mentally challenged, so just pray Allah be his guide. Now that you know that he's just a shallow lil' fool that got nothing better to do then chirpsing and having gurls all over him, just forget about him.
5) Remember you can't control his actions but you can control your own InshAllah. Let this be a lesson for all. MashAllah it takes bare to control your own nafs, so in a way be happy as meny would've given in.
6) Smilings =)
Braaaapppppp!!!!
Allahafz
Oh ok
Tania lol not you just a sister referred her as a man but apparently is slang lol
Anyways back to the topic the answer that have been given are all very good masha allah.
Sister i really hope everything works out for you and please next time he comes near you just warn him that you going to call the police and even do it if necessary and make dua!
just out of curiousity ... r u considerin him as a husband .. is that a kinda man u want . i mean clearly it shows he anit religious n doesnt fear allah . i mean Seriously is he going to be a good model for ur kids n a grt husband come on now thats a TRUN OFFFFF if he dared to touch u like that im tell u now he doesnt have any respect for u.... n believe me good looks wont take u no where ... at the end of the day its his personalty that would matter... sometimes ppl be thinkin oh i can change him/ her ... n the answer is U cant change anyone if they aint willin to change for them selves...im not sayin u said it but im sayin in general. and as many ppl told u go n tell someone at least ur mom .. she wont judge u .. n plus she ll help u.. believe me i was once in that situation bas el hamduallah .. i told my mom n she did help me alot even though my dad has no clue till today .. but HE got wat he deserve... all im sayin honestly be carefullllllll n try not to take it as we tryin to be mean or anythin but im tryin to help u as much as i can .. cuz i once was in ur situation .... so i can relate.
p.s i didnt mean to offend u im just tryin to help u see .. at the end its ur call rite .. take care .. salamz
no jumping to conclusions. but your account brings up or raises some questions...
1. you say your practising yet you gave your number, spoke to him over the phone.
2. you spoke to him while alone.
3. you choose to accept a loser as a potential husband who doesnt respect women.
4. if you were serious about resisting keeping him away, you would have done something about it before it reached a third time.
so my advice.
Find a better guy and leave him and anything to do with him, just ignore him. put him on block and delete him. You dont want to waste your time with someone like that. believe me.
i suggest you read the beautiful, wonderful story of yusuf reflect ponder and draw your own lessons and plan of action.
if your stuck, need help or unsure just gimme a shout and i'll help you.
Ditto bro ! Excellent of you to point that out. When I finished reading, im like, she has to be joking. If he touched you, and kissed you, he can be jailed as far as i know, and be charged as well, yet you don't do that. Also, you calim your practising yet you are attracted and talk to him. Very absurd. anyway, this brother said it all that needs to be said. Now its up to you.
The Possibilities in Islam are limitless.
The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want. -Ben Stein
They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself. -Andy Warhol
I am saddened that some of u are judging me. You dont know me, so please dont say things like "if u really wanted to protect ur modesty u wudve stayed away". Allah knows me.
Brother Mujahid, u are so disrespectful n judgemental I really cannot believe that u call urself a brother. How on earth did u know that I personally gave him my number? He somehow managed to get it from the muslims in my school. Not that I need to prove u anything but So much for making "excuses" for ur fellow muslims.
I dont appreciate ur insults either. Wat a great way to give dawah just insult n humiliate.
And for the record I did not consider him as a potential husband. That thought actually never crossed my mind. I did want to see if there is more to him besides his looks.
Alpha dude dont piety me pls. I have a mind Alhamdulilah and I am not as weak as u are trying to describe me.
And I have no plans to tell my Father, I dont intend to see him on the news paper in the next 24/hours. Neither my Brothers, although I am very close with them, I dont want them to beat anybody n get into trouble because of me.
Jezklahkhayr.
IF YOUR NOT GOING TO TELL YOUR FATHER OR YOUR BROTHERS THEN......
I SUGGEST YOU GET REAL ADVICE FROM THE SHEIKH OF A MOSQUE NEAR YOU....YOU KNOW IF YOU LIVED IN ANY ARABIC COUNTRY YOU COULD JUST TELL THE POLICE ...THEY CALL THAT SEXUAL HARRASSMENT AND IT IS TOTALLY HARAM AND ILLEGAL.
IF YOUR NOT GOING TO TELL YOUR FATHER OR YOUR BROTHERS THEN......
I SUGGEST YOU GET REAL ADVICE FROM THE SHEIKH OF A MOSQUE NEAR YOU....YOU KNOW IF YOU LIVED IN ANY ARABIC COUNTRY YOU COULD JUST TELL THE POLICE ...THEY CALL THAT SEXUAL HARRASSMENT AND IT IS TOTALLY HARAM AND ILLEGAL.
Same as the UK they will call it Sexual Harassment, and she will be able to get a restraining order in place. Dont you think she would be embarrassed / scared going to the mosque for advise ?
May Allah make it easy for you. My sincere advice would be: call or mail a shaykh. Al hamdulillah, you can do it anonymously, 100%, as you have forums. I'd suggest you godint to Multaqa Ahl al-Hadeeth. There come brothers who are learned in Qur'an and Sunnah, and Qur'an and Sunnah are Allah's words and words of His SWT Messenger, and surely Allah knows best. Al hamdu lillah, you're a muslimah, so you already know where you can search for an answer. I could give you a few advice, but a miskeen in knowledge can't add much to these 7 pages.
So, plz do take advantage of the site I mentioned to you. Also, if there is anything we can do anything for you, plz do not hesitate a second to contact your sisters and brothers here.
Sister,
The first thing. Please stop calling him a brother. Such a person who emotionally tortures other muslims and harrases women is no brother of muslims.
I know it may be difficult for you to resist him. So I would suggest that you better tell your parents about him. But if you are too scared then if you have a brother, tell him about it. In any case try your best to prevent being alone with him. And please practice naqaab.
I would like to make a suggestion here. If you marry such a guy who is so deeply rooted to evil then, no offence, but you probably will adopt the same practices. Please don't plunge into the hell fire.
A few months ago When I started this thread, I have taken all of ur advices into consideration and have stopped answering any private calls on my mob.
I bumped into him yesterday in another city! He called it "fate" bringing us together. I walked away he kept following me asking me to allow him to ask for my hand and that he would never marry if It isn't with me...?
That he changed, he kept apologizing for the things he did to me and asked me to safe him by marrying him. I didn't get that.
That he changed, he kept apologizing for the things he did to me and asked me to safe him by marrying him. I didn't get that.
He's referring to the sex.
Some things will never change, I guess.
You're wrong. Everything is capable of change. Everything and everyone. But perhaps you're not the right person/reason/substance to change the guy. I haven't read through the thread, but I don't understand why you're not telling anyone. Because if you have and they confronted him, then surely there ought to be some result?
Besides, the fact that you said he was good-looking somewhat made me feel as though you're not putting up enough resistance. I'm well aware of the fact that what I'm saying now might be totally out of boundary... I'm not accusing you of anything. I'm just suggesting what your first post seemed like. To me.
WHY???? are you letting this idiot anywhere near you and not running 500 miles in the opposite direction. You see him you walk far far away. He cannot stop you or talk to you unless you allow him...............
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
A few months ago When I started this thread, I have taken all of ur advices into consideration and have stopped answering any private calls on my mob.
I bumped into him yesterday in another city! He called it "fate" bringing us together. I walked away he kept following me asking me to allow him to ask for my hand and that he would never marry if It isn't with me...?
That he changed, he kept apologizing for the things he did to me and asked me to safe him by marrying him. I didn't get that.
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Re: A Brother Harrased me Sexually several times
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