I have a question about my social life.. To start of my mother always tells me do not hang out with girls. I respect her ways of trying to raise me right but I am now 15 and I think I am smart enough to realize the limit between having friends that are girls and having a girlfriend.
I ask her why she always tells me that I shouldn't be with girls and the usuall reply is "We're not christians" and she walks away, and I say nothing back.
Due to this fact my social life has gone DOWNHILL because I cannot go out anymore without being criticized of who I'm going to hang out with.
Even my friends realized this as I used numerous excuses to tell them why I cannot show up to the mall, the park, or any other social activity.. but know they know and I don't mind it but they think my mom is crazy.
About the times I do go out there is a 50/50 percent chance that some of my girl friends will be there, and when I do leave the girls usually hug me and my other friends good-bye.
Also, one of my closest friends is a girl and I do call her my sister because we've been very close to each other since the last 4 and a half years since we've met.. and yes she's white.
My brothers and my sister in law who to believe I should be able to hang out with them.
Now here is where the main part of my question stands ;
In my opinion I believe that muslim teenagers should live a good, happy, and fun social life. Where I can be hanging out whether a guy or girl and just live life up to the fullest.. Until I have reached an adult age where I am 18+ then I should settle down, hit the books (study even harder), not worry about girls, and then after a few years find and marry the right woman.
I am a good muslim although this is one of the situations where I have wanted to seek advice from and see other people's opinions.
Sorry, I know this was long, but to summarize things up it goes into two questions.
A.) Should or can muslim boys hang out with girls ?
B.) Is it really that bad where I shouldn't ?
[QUOTE][A.) Should or can muslim boys hang out with girls ?
B.) Is it really that bad where I shouldn't ? /QUOTE]
A) Should? obviously not
B) Yep
Think about it mate, you wouldn't have soo much segregation of men and women in islam if you were allowed to freemix. It doesn't matter if you know your limits, you shouldn't be looking at girls, talking to girls let alone 'hanging' out with. I'm sure you can work out the reasons, its better to stop the root of the problem than to the take risks where you could end up in haram.
Oh yh and about your social life, I don't think it matters whether or not it gets affected, its more important that you stop all links with them girls, make new friends - if possible muslim friends
Looks like you've got it a bit easy for yourself, If I was caught around girls I would be in whole load of **** and I think so would most of us brothers
Last edited by aadil77; 12-25-2008 at 09:54 AM.
He it is Who sends blessings on you, as do His angels, that He may bring you out from the depths of Darkness into Light: and He is Full of Mercy to the Believers. [Quran {33:43}] www.QuranicAudio.com www.Quran.com
Also, one of my closest friends is a girl and I do call her my sister because we've been very close to each other since the last 4 and a half years since we've met.. and yes she's white.
I don't have much to add to brother aadils advice, but I just want to say it doesn't matter whether she's white, black, or purple; a girl is a girl.
On Judgement Day Allah is not going to ask how awesome your social life was, or how often you went out, or how many friends you had. He's going to ask you about your deen, Islam, and how well you adhered to His teachings.
Remember the saying of the prophet peace be upon him: "Whoever gives up something for the sake of Allah, Allah will replace it with something better than it".
hmm your mother is trying her best to make you of those who worship Allah and fear him properly. She wants to make you a good muslim, she wants the BEST for you in this world and the hereafter! thats why shes trying to keep you away from what she knows, in her wisdom to be wrong !
you may not realise it now, your young, but freemixing is forbidden for an extremely huge reason! many MANY people learn this the hardway, please bro take your mothers advice and learn it the easy way, nothing good can come from free-mixing.
The ones who do freemix in this manner... are not DEVOTED TO ALLAH OR ISLAM! to try say this in anyway is a joke, you cannot socialise in this manner and expect to be a good muslim.
brother pick up the Quran, do your prayers, and pretty soon Allah will give you the understanding that freemixing is wrong and you'll realise why.
stay away from bad company (the ones who freemix are BAD!) and inshAllah Allah will replace you with better.
DECIDE NOW IF YOU WANT ENJOYMENY IN THIS LIFE OR THE NEXT! THIS LIFE ISNT WORTH IT!
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My tears testify that i have a heart
yet i feel me and shaytan never part
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Salaamalakum bro, mashallah its good that you are concerned whether or not what you are doing is right in Islam.
Bro nowdays people always say "life only comes once live it to the fullest" bro this is so wrong... being a muslim we should live life as it was our last day and worship Allah swt, what i mean by this is pray as it is your last day on earth instead of living it up etc.
Bro hanging around with women is not allowed in Islam bro, the Quran says that the beliving men and women should lower their gaze and guard their chastity. We are ment to lower our gaze bro from stairing at women etc and interacting with them unnecessarily.
Bro one small sin could lead to a even bigger sin trust me. Bro as you said you know ur limits between having a friend and a girlfriend but bro Shaytaan can easily overcome you, he can make you believe that what your doing is right.
Bro you said that the girls sometimes hug you etc bro this isnt allowed if the girl is Non Mehram to you.
Rasulullah S.A.W. said, "It is better for a man that a steel nail be driven through the centre of his head rather than if he touches the palm of a strange women (Non Mehram Women)."
can someone help me,i can't contact another member.why???
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can someone help me,i can't contact another member.why???
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what's that???
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