Debate fun with my father and his friend (non-muslim)

**catalzzy** · 06-30-2009

all.

When i was in my father's restaurant and i noticed my father's friend which i am close to as hes my guardian.

I strike off with my idea to talk to the guardian, i said "what is your say if i am willing to get married now?"

My father heard me, and he is like what? "YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED?" with a very unusual expression. hmph.

I told him, who cares, i m willing to talk about it.

He keep debating that "i am too young, 19years old, come on thats not right, its better at 26 or older and you have to marry a malaysian girl of my choice and your mother's choice, no other girls like arabs, etc, your gettin on uni and you probably would get headache from marrying now, so education first"

My guardian keep watching me arguing with my dad which has the better point in marriage.

I was like well, hold on. "you dont ever listen to Islam, it encourages me to marry as soon as possible, because marriage can make a person more happier, and forced marriage is not permissible, malay girl wouldnt make a difference to other different race cos we come from Adam and Eve, and you are being too racist thinking that our race is superior to the chinese, indians etc.and stop calling me stupid for nothing and you havent learnt about equality, and culture has nothing to do with Islam"

My dad began to stutter, when i asked him the logical questions such as forced marriage.
My dad married at age 27 and it was his choice, i pointed out "if you had the choice, why your father didnt tell you that you have to marry a malay girl as it is not his choice to pick a girl for you, and why are you saying to me that i have to marry a malay girl as your choice huh?"

My guardian even agreed with my dad just over my age, stupidity and deafness.

so, all they r saying is to bring education first and dis encourage me about marriage hmph...

because it would be waste if Allah s.w.t takes my soul, judgment day coming, and death in the way. o well...

Allah Akbar......

what shall i do? i mean, i really liked to get married because i really liked to give what i am worthy to protect my future spouse

inshallah.

oh dear.....

Brothers and Sisters out there, help.

May Allah bless u all.

**Muhaba** · 06-30-2009

What is the matter with these people? why can't they mind their own business?

nineteen is not too young at all. I mean if you were 15, then they'd have a point, but 19? i think all people should get married young.

and about the race thing, that's dumb. what difference does it make? Allah made all muslims halal to get married to, so why should humans make such restrictions?

what you can do is pray to Allah that He changes their minds and bring the topic up from different angles occasionally, and eventually they will change, insha-Allah. (but imo avoid talking in front of your guardian about this as he will side with your father and strengthen your father's viewpoints. your guardian has no business in this at all. maybe talk to your mom about it?

hope that helped.