I'm very close to my girl cousins, we spend so much time together, always always go to meals and events with eachother, and i even spent last night with them at a restaurant, but i've just found out all of them have gone for a day out today, and didn't tell me at all. I'm really confused and hurt. I've asked outright, if there was any reason i wasn't invited, not with anger, just a short text asking that.
I can't think of a valid reason they could justify not telling me, so i am feeling quite hurt. Tonight we're going to gather and just relax at one of the cousin's house, this was arranged yesterday in advance..but now i don't feel like going because i've found out this.
Am i sinning by reacting this way - being hurt and then not attending another event because of it, and effectively showing them how hurt i am?
Re: How to deal with family/friends leaving you out?
DO NOT react my dear!
Ive been through the same thing for YEARS.
I had a group of friends, and a cousin of mine who has always excluded me from whatever she could, became friends with my friends and then slowly took them away one by one and convinced them to exclude me too.
It hurt, but once i started to realize that Allah swt does not let things happen to you that you cannot handle and also, He allows certain things to happen to you so that you are tested and learn from the experience.
Do not ask them again. Im telling you sis, FIGHT the urge to text them. Its Shaitan trying to make you cause a bigger rift, trying to make you go head first into a conflict.
Dont fall for it.
They love you im sure, sometimes people just want to spend time with certain people. Its not because they dont like you, the probably love you! But human beings are strange sometimes. Sometimes i want to hang out with specific friends, and other times i dont want to hang out with anyone!
Hang in there sweetheart! If anything, how about you plan some days out with other friends you have every once in a while?
Broaden who youre friends with, so that when you are excluded, you have someone to call to spend time with.
Re: How to deal with family/friends leaving you out?
Ah..
Your lucky that you have family members to keep your company. I'm always alone >_>
Really nothing to get upset about. Be grateful.
Tonight we're going to gather and just relax at one of the cousin's house, this was arranged yesterday in advance..but now i don't feel like going because i've found out this.
Just go to their house and have fun.
Last edited by GuestFellow; 07-23-2009 at 12:19 AM.
I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.
Re: How to deal with family/friends leaving you out?
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
I'm very close to my girl cousins, we spend so much time together, always always go to meals and events with eachother, and i even spent last night with them at a restaurant, but i've just found out all of them have gone for a day out today, and didn't tell me at all. I'm really confused and hurt. I've asked outright, if there was any reason i wasn't invited, not with anger, just a short text asking that.
I can't think of a valid reason they could justify not telling me, so i am feeling quite hurt.
maybe they were planning a surprise for you
Also sis, i don't mean to be insensitive or anything, but sometimes people-no matter how close you may be with them and likewise them with you-they may just feel they may need time away from you...so yeah they may have needed their space and felt too shy/embarrassed to tell you
Tonight we're going to gather and just relax at one of the cousin's house, this was arranged yesterday in advance..but now i don't feel like going because i've found out this.
just go sis ...u may just make things worse
Last edited by Ummu Sufyaan; 07-23-2009 at 07:49 AM.
...desperate for husnul-khitaam...
please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.
Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.
When you create an account, we remember exactly what you've read, so you always come right back where you left off. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and share your thoughts. Sign Up
Hide
Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.
Bookmarks