i hope when you read this your in best of your health INSALLAH
Unfortunately i have come up with another thread regarding marriage.
You have to have a good degree and a good job in order to get married. The girl or the guy has to be from the same race or in some cultures the same cast.Most of all the wedding ceremony i mean O M G the mehndi(henna), the wedding day and then the walima. All these haram things people dancing,free mixing and showing of the wealth, what is that?where is that in islam??All of these reasons are making guys and girls go towards haram things.We all have needs and desiers and if one doesnt fulfil them in the halal way then BAM satan comes in and say ''you know what allow the marriage you need to do this and to do that'' you know what i mean?
Where do we go now?What we do then?If our parents donot understand what are we supposed to do?I am sure i am speaking for many of the brothers and sisters out there.
There are other problems too practiciing brothers cant find practicing sister and vice versa.
lets take my example yes
i am 23yrs old i have a degree in business management(ASIAN YAAR) and i want to get married because i want to be away from the fitna.Dont get me wrong its not like i am desperate to get married but i will be lying if i say that i donot want to get married asap.First some of my elders tell me wait till your 27 because that is the perfect age to get married and when my parents start looking for a girl they apparently cannot seem to find a practicing muslimah i mean HELLO living in a muslim country and cannot find one what is that all about.Lets take western countries yes, practicing sisters here donot ask you anything about the deen first question is What Is Ur VISA STATUS.WHERE is that in islam??I agree that people from back home donot have the best of reputation but are all of them after your passport?I dont wana pledge my allegiance to the queen.ONE UMMAH right??Why is it so hard to fulfil the sunnah of our beloved PROPHET SAW
I have put forward my example just to give an idea of what i am trying to say.I hope every one understands it.INSALLAH
Brother convert you are still young find a job first and when you are ready there are millions muslim girls worldwide to get marry with and there are so many muslim marriage websites so dont worry and allah give you the best inshallah.
Brother convert you are still young find a job first and when you are ready there are millions muslim girls worldwide to get marry with and there are so many muslim marriage websites so dont worry and allah give you the best inshallah.
your sister in islam,
btissam
I have graduated university, have a very well-paying job, am probably 5-10 years older than most of you, and have plenty of money saved up to start a family. I'm not too keen on the online thing though.
I have graduated university, have a very well-paying job, am probably 5-10 years older than most of you, and have plenty of money saved up to start a family. I'm not too keen on the online thing though.
I really pray that you find a good spouse, my mum has helped many people get married some whom just have approached her, she does it out of swaab and deen work. Maybe you have someone like this in the community. If you need help let me know.
good discussion,
Nowadays, it is must easier to do haraam (girl friend, boy friend, fitnah etc) than to do something halaal (getting married).:'(
Guys are expected to get married at about 26+, but i think its better if they marry at about 19, lol
May Allah save us from all kinds of fitnah and fulfil our desires in the best, pleasing way possible.
good discussion,
Nowadays, it is must easier to do haraam (girl friend, boy friend, fitnah etc) than to do something halaal (getting married).:'(
Guys are expected to get married at about 26+, but i think its better if they marry at about 19, lol
May Allah save us from all kinds of fitnah and fulfil our desires in the best, pleasing way possible.
Totally agree, marriage stops you from a lot of haraam things, marriage is also half of a person's imaan, this just emphasises on the significance of marriage.
I really pray that you find a good spouse, my mum has helped many people get married some whom just have approached her, she does it out of swaab and deen work. Maybe you have someone like this in the community. If you need help let me know.
wa alaikum as-salaam
no, i know of no such person in my community. i tried asking around about 4-5 months ago but was told in no uncertain terms that nobody would marry their daughter off to a white convert here. kinda ticked me off actually.
no, i know of no such person in my community. i tried asking around about 4-5 months ago but was told in no uncertain terms that nobody would marry their daughter off to a white convert here. kinda ticked me off actually.
Brother that is so sad, if you live in the UK then I could help you because I might know some practising muslim sisters who are willing to marry someone like yourself.
Brother you are out of options really unless you move areas or that if a awarness campaign is carried out in the place where you live, where people are educated about issues like this . My sisters best friend is married to a covert they have had a happy marriage mashAllah. Allah will help you InshAllah.
You live in the US brother, I suppose? There are plenty of revert sisters here too...have you tried finding a revert sister? I know of some revert sisters myself.
*Without Allah, without Islam, life would be meaningless. If I've ever learned patience, it's because of this. Alhamdulillah...*
You live in the US brother, I suppose? There are plenty of revert sisters here too...have you tried finding a revert sister? I know of some revert sisters myself.
yeah. the problem here is that while i know some families in the community, i am really not a part of the community. its mostly just chitchat in the masjid and nothing really outside of that. basically, i dont know anybody who could introduce me to any sisters or anything. do you understand me?
i dont know too many muslims my age (mid to late 20s) as there is a large gap in attendance in my masjid. basically there are 2 or 3 teenagers, me, and uncles 40+ who go to the masjid. i know a couple guys from before i became muslim but they dont live in the same town as i do and i dont get to see them that often
yeah. the problem here is that while i know some families in the community, i am really not a part of the community. its mostly just chitchat in the masjid and nothing really outside of that. basically, i dont know anybody who could introduce me to any sisters or anything. do you understand me?
i dont know too many muslims my age (mid to late 20s) as there is a large gap in attendance in my masjid. basically there are 2 or 3 teenagers, me, and uncles 40+ who go to the masjid. i know a couple guys from before i became muslim but they dont live in the same town as i do and i dont get to see them that often
Maybe you could give a speech at the local mosque, talk about the sunnah of marriage and then maybe ask the imaam if he could talk to someone Im sure the local imaam will help you.
Maybe you could give a speech at the local mosque, talk about the sunnah of marriage and then maybe ask the imaam if he could talk to someone Im sure the local imaam will help you.
i kinda have too much pride to do something like that but thanks for the suggestion
Bruv nothin to do with pride in talkin to the imam, plenty of people do it when looking for spouses, here in uk some masjids have imams running matrimonial services.
InshAllah you will find a good spouse, maybe a white convert sister?
i kinda have too much pride to do something like that but thanks for the suggestion
Brother don't get offended but seems to me that you are set in your own ways, in this day and age no one is going to come and give their daughters hand to you with out you making a any attempts. Don't let your pride get in the way, I have noticed however that there are lot of muslim brothers who have a lot of pride but it really gets them no where.
My cousin is 24 and really wants to get married he wants a girl to propose to him, second she has to be extremely good looking, certain age, heigh, colour and a perfect personality I have told him to lower his standards and look for good character.This just shows that the more picky we are the more we got to worry,( this is not directed to you ) but at the same time searching for a life partner isnt easy. Leave it to Allah he will make a way for you.
Bruv nothin to do with pride in talkin to the imam, plenty of people do it when looking for spouses, here in uk some masjids have imams running matrimonial services.
InshAllah you will find a good spouse, maybe a white convert sister?
Bruv nothin to do with pride in talkin to the imam, plenty of people do it when looking for spouses, here in uk some masjids have imams running matrimonial services.
InshAllah you will find a good spouse, maybe a white convert sister?
btw where do you live?
its not about talking to the imam. like i said, i tried that route 4-5 months ago and was rebuffed. i do not know about those matrimonial services either. i mean, i want to get married but i also want to do in islamically and those things don't seem even the slightest but islamic. besides, my masjid doesnt do anything like that.
i live in the us
like i stated earlier, i do not know any convert sisters or any sisters really for that matter. i dont feel comfortable approaching someone in hijab on the street and saying "do you want to marry me?"
format_quote Originally Posted by celina
Brother don't get offended but seems to me that you are set in your own ways, in this day and age no one is going to come and give their daughters hand to you with out you making a any attempts. Don't let your pride get in the way, I have noticed however that there are lot of muslim brothers who have a lot of pride but it really gets them no where.
My cousin is 24 and really wants to get married he wants a girl to propose to him, second she has to be extremely good looking, certain age, heigh, colour and a perfect personality I have told him to lower his standards and look for good character.This just shows that the more picky we are the more we got to worry,( this is not directed to you ) but at the same time searching for a life partner isnt easy. Leave it to Allah he will make a way for you.
i dont take offense. i dont see how i am set in my ways though. i dont know anybody to "make an attempt" with and when i try i get told that white guys aren't good enough to marry their daughters.
the thing is, im not overly picky. i have no choice but to have tawakkul but i cant sit here and say that its not frustrating to the point of madness either.
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