I dont think that I have ever felt this worse, thus I came here to seek advice, maybe some help. I consider myself someone who truly understands the value of my parents. I have always respected them, given them their right, lowered that wing of mercy that ALlah speaks of in the Quraan, never have I uttered a harsh word to either of them. I love both of them alot but my mother and me had a fight today about the way I dress, which resulted into my mother saying 'you will go to hell'. I dont know what got my mother that much in rage that she thinks she can destine me to hell?. I will briefly describe the way I dress,I usually wear knee'length dress'es with jeans, or pants, linen, I keep it loose.
I don't understand why my mother is being so judgemental & even going so far to declare me as a future hell resident. My mother usually gets touchy when me & her go out together. She shows me all the love in the world, but as soon as it comes to stepping out that door all hell breaks loose. I am a Muslim, I know that I am not perfect but I am trying,.
I dont want to be someone I am not, I am NOT a niqaabie, nor am I a jilbabie, maybe one day when my Imaan flourishes I will wear clothes according to my Imaan until then I am not going to put on a show for our next neighbours or people i dont even know just because so & so's daughter wears a nIqaab or Abayah! Why must I please people, this is who I am! I am obviously not ready to wear such clothes for Allahs sake, why must I wear it for people?!
Must I become a munafiq? a pretender? I am in a lot of pain, my own mother has said such things to me. How is that suppose to help me? Isn't it enough for her that I am a good daughter other'wise? I try to do so much for her, even put body lotion on her every time she comes out the shower, massage her feet. Kiss her every day! I try to do everything she asks me, everything and even beyond. When she tells me no I accept it without questioning her. I am not saying that I can ever repay my mother, but I try as hard as I can. I know shes right. I am heading towards that path, where is the patience? Why can't she wait for me to develop, slowly inshaAllah I will get there, I know I will but for now this is who I am.
Please advice me...
jazaks
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... When you wear it, your intention is not to please your next door neighbor. Or the bearded man two flats away... But rather, your mother.
The important point here is our ultimate goal is to please Allah. So , we must not wear anything that can please mom but not Allah.
To the OP : as already suggested , mom did not mean it . She loves u , she cares for u . Don't be upset what she told u in anger . Try to help her in kitchen and in household works , pray for her , make her happy. InshaAllah u will get many rewards in this world and hereafter
Christ will never be proud to reject to be a slave to God .....holy Quran, chapter Women , 4: 172
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I am heading towards that path, where is the patience? Why can't she wait for me to develop, slowly inshaAllah I will get there, I know I will but for now this is who I am.
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