For Allah sake any body can help me

Wa Alikum Assalaam Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaatuh.

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

I cant marry a girl . Because I have seen many married guys having homo sex . For the name sake those people are getting marry with girl for showing the society including Muslim guys . Now I am doing one Sin by having homo sex . I don't want to become double Sinner like those people who are getting marry being a gay and having sex with other males .Very Rear those people are having sex with their wife . But they are not missing any opportunity to having sex with any other males. I don't have any right to spoil some others life . I am not that kind of guy who are not giving any value to the women . I cant destroy any girl's life .

and is it a must to do that after marriage? you are not like those men, you stopped being with men, didn`t you?
getting married would help ya so much my respected brother, to live with someone who can take care of you and serve your needs and love you legaly and according the Shari`aa...why not?

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

Second thing : I don't have any hobby . I don't play any game . I don't watch movie nor listen to music . I was liking to do gardening When I was child; But my elder sister and mother did not allow me to do gardening so I have stop it long back ago . Because I was a crazy guy that is the reason my family did not allow me to do any thing which I liked . It was my punishment . If I want to do gardening now I cant, because I stay in a rental house its in second floor where don't have any place to do gardening. [ here I would like to mention that I watched gay porn movies ]

and are they still there to prevent you from doing what you like? and gardening is not the only thing in world to do, you can discover so much in you , just don`t think about yourself so low then you will be able to find so much...

I don`t see movies and I don`t listen to music either cause I don`t need such haraam things to entertain me...I am talking about halaal things brother...can`t you just get out of the house and find you a place where you feel peaceful and comfortable...sitting there and thinking of Allah, looking around you and reflecting on Allah`s creation, have you tried reading Qur`aan and understand it?there is so much dreariness inside of you Akhi , because your soul is hungry and you are not feeding it with Athiker and Qur`aan...thats why you are feeling lonely and depressed...I really wana know what r you waiting for? why not taking the cure before you fall on your face? I really don`t understand...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

Third thing : I have seen women are very much dominating nature . They cant be friend . I have seen my mother my elder sister my aunties they are always doing competition with their husband . Their main intention is how to dominating their husband . I don't need a sex partner only . I need a sex partner as well as good friend . who can understand me , who can help me , who can love me , who can take care me, who can bother about my problems, who can support me , I don't want to become one of those husbands . I have many conception about woman .

and are all women the same? are you the same as your father? none like the other so, stop imagining and believe your imaginations...
why not having a wife who will take care of you, love you, respect you, help you and be your friend and soulmate? there are many great women who are better than what you are thinking and you by judging all for the deeds and manners of some; wronging us my respected brother...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

forth thing: unfortunately I saw my mother's and my sister's vagina and accidentally I have touched my elder sister breast when I was child . here I don't want to disclose the reason of those incident , Just keep in your mind that, it was not happen by my wish . I was very young that time . I could not understand even what was going on . I am sorry for discussing all those thing . But the problem is I cant think about any woman . whenever I try to think about any woman those incident comes in front of my eyes . I love my mom and my sister but at the same time I hate them .

and what if I saw man`s private parts ? what if I was raped and abused sexualy? am I stupid to ruin my whole life for the past, for something ugly had happened and ended? am I going to judge all men the same for the deed of one beast? where is justic in that then?

I would surely build my future and try my best to make it bright and happy forgetting about past and bad things had happned by the grace and mercy of Allah by returning to my Lord and asking Him for His aid and help by reading His book and following His commandments to increase my Imaan and taqwa to get closer to Allah...what is wrong with you brother? satan is playing with your mind and you are listening to him while he is weaker than you and have no chance ever to be in Jannah and you O son of Adam have all the chances to correct your mistakes and have two paths to choose ...want him to drag you to hell with him? go, follow him, listen to him and be miserable.. let him control you and then he wins and what you have got? nothing but Hell and more torments...

and thats too which made you feel low, lonely and depressed, thinking of things had happened and done...and this is won`t ever benefit you by any mean or in any way, you are just driving your self insane killing yourself so slowly by tying yourself to past ; losing both of your present and future...you are the one whom causing yourself all those troubles and misery with all my respect....Allah showed you the way and opened your eyes then why are you trying to close them and all the doors which have been opened for ya by ignoring all what The Most Exalted taught you and blessed you with? you already have His Noble Book but what benefit you took from it? I swear by The Owner of heavens and earth and all living and non; as long as you feel like this and thinking this way then with all my respect; you took nothing...

you always giving excuses to justify all things you do and all what you are feeling...stop deceiving yourself and be a man enough to face your troubles , get rid of them all and be a good servant...you are not wasting our time Akhi ; you are only wasting your time in useless things and thoughts which taking you to no where but to the edge of a horrible grave...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

Neither I want to go to my parents house nor my other family member's or relatives house . Infect I will get a luxurious life over there. Even I don't have dare to stay there . Now I stay in a very small place . But my past life was very luxurious . I leave all those thing . Now I am poor . I don't have dare to make my self more insecure . I am still insecure . I know poor people does not have any respect in this world . People may say that Islam has equal value to all but in practical its not true . Recently I got one more prove regarding different between poor and rich Muslim . Discrimination is there between Muslims whereas Islam strictly prohibited discrimination , you can imagine now what about other religions people . I just know the life is very painful .

if something is forbidden in Islam then it is my brother no matter how many Muslims you see violating Allah`s limits and life is painful for those who make it painful...and want respect from people? then respect your Lord and His limitations, respect His Book which you have but not letting it control your life...when you please Allah then all of His creation wil be pleased with you even non living things ... and I know many and many poor people whom are respected in this world and others see them as kings ...

open your eyes and wake up for Allah`s sake, I am so sorry if being harsh with you my respected brother but you always say that we don`t understand you while you are the one who understands us not and if bad things happening with you then cause you are letting them...change yourself then you will see how your life would be...

take care of yourself...

May Allah be with you...Ameeen

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

assala mu alaiqum ! my dear sister " Amat Allah " Thank you for your reply . I really want to overcome from my current situation . But how ? My up side down . I have to turn it completely . I really need a guidance . Where from I start , how I start , How I continue , I really dot know. I am becoming aggressive and horny, Its happen If I use those medicine. My suicide tendency is increase if I don't use those medicine . What to do , what not to do . I am confuse . I have inferiority complex, I have some revenge feeling towards to male ;Whenever I see any guy who is superior to me ' I want to take revenge from them . I want to take off their manliness . I want to show them that, I am superior then you .I want to show them that, I am a man , I am not the things which you can use . But the thing is they likes my wildness on bed . And my revenge is endless . Its going on only . day be day it increasing only . I know its not right . But I cant control it . I discussed it with my doctors but doctors told its one kind of sexual felling and many people have this feeling, and many people likes their sex partner should be wild on bed . But I don't like my this feeling . Its hurting me . I have feeling that, all men are my enemy and I should show them my power . And its going on and on . I could not control it . Here I may not explain my feeling towards to man . My feeling is more harder then my explanation . I have many thoughts towards to woman too . But I don't know that, should I share it or not. People may think its my excuses . May be those are my excuses but those excuses are really influencing my life . Its destroying my life . My life is very complicated . I don't know how do I correct it . Trying to change my life is equal to searching a mustered seed from the desert . How it possible ? I don't think any body was there or is there who has complicated life such as me and he change him self and become happy and safe and living a normal life . Allah knows better .

Wa Alikum Assalaam Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaatuh

Ya Akhi you are rushing things and want everything to be done at once and that is so hard and impossible, you are making things hard to yourself... why not taking it step by step....

first : start with Salaat, try to pray constantly, never neglect your prayers this is the first thing you should do and mantain...pary and feel that you are praying to Allah and understand every word you say in salaat...Ya Akhi you are confusing yourself by yourself and the solution is in your hands after Allah...

second: try to read Qur`aan and understand it as much as you can, that would change so much in you...don`t sit aside putting hand over the another and wait for things to be solved and done by themselves...work hard to improve yourself and your life...nothing in life comes without a price or freely, we should work hard and sincerely to get what we want...Ya Akhi get up and be effective WaAllahi letting misery controling you won`t benefit you ever but would make you feel worse...

feeling horny then go for a run and do some sport to get rid of these feelings...you are always taking the easy ways to solve this problem, watching bad things, doing masterbation...etc, why to return to wrong solutions? tell me? instead of being patient and return to things which would help you to get over your feelings legaly; you make things worse to yourself...

try to take the right decisions instead of displeasing Allah to comfort yourself...you can please Allah and at the same time comfort yourself just think right and correct your mistakes...

and your excusese are influencing your life because you are letting them, stand strong and face all these worthless things instead of being weak and letting them control ya...and none is your enemy, you are the enemy of yourself so, try to make a truce with yourself and try to love yourself to make things better and clear for ya and to walk in Allah`s way easily...

I dont have confident about my self , because I have seen many people who are offering 5 times Sallah keeping beard and having versed knowledge about Islam and married and having kid even they are having homo sex , their age may be any thing (25 to 65 years ) . Not even this much , I have seen many middle east including Saudi Arabians Muslim married guys are coming to India for having homo sex only . They stay such a Muslim environment even they cant stop homo sex , How come I success about it . I am nothing in frond of them . How come I expect not having homo sex after married whereas those great country's Muslim people are not able to control them self ?

you don`t have confident?

cause you didn`t feed your soul thats why cause you are away from Allah thats why...before I know my Lord I was a shoe in everyone`s feet so humiliated, used and have not a spot of self confident..miserable lonely and living in darkness I bet animals were better than me at that time...but when I start praying and knew my way to my Lord , I gain all respect , love and self confident in this world and I am a human again...

and seeing people like this will never ever make you like them, then why not saying : I saw many good people in my life beating up their parents to death and I have no confidant so, I am going now to beat up my mother and take her eyes out of her head ( may Allah honor Ummi and protect her from all harms and may Allah break my hands if I ever think about this Ameeeen)..does that make sens? are we connected to others? are we robots or what? are others controling us and moving us with a remote control?don`t you have a brain to think with?...is the action and deeds of people what you take as a moral base in your life are those the source you are taking your knowledge and teachings from? Sub`haan Allah, where did the book of Allah and Sunnah of His prophet go? where did the greatest example for humanity ; The prophet (peace and blesings of Allah be upon him) go?

and being from Saudi won`t make you better than others my respected brother, cause good and bad are everywhere and not all the Saudi people are good nor all are bad and the same for all the people around the world...

I know people whom are from Arabs, born Muslims, from an old royal family and related to the prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) but they are not even compared to one non Arab person who reverted to Islam to Allah from a short time...

a country, race, some rank or a kinship would never make us better than others my respected brother and won`t elevate your stauts in the sight of Allah ever but your sincere good deeds and submission to Allah...

Secondly you told : " and are all women the same? are you the same as your father? none like the other so, stop imagining and believe your imaginations... " I have asked to my psychiatrist that, I am not same as my family , I am different from my family . My psychiatrist told its correct , my family is not Gay but I am Gay . Its the different between my family and me . I never ever seen any women who is doing respect or friendly behave with their husband. It would be my imagination if I think there are such women who is offering friendly behavior with their husband . I only heard it not see it .

I think your psyc will only lead your way to a bad end...we are all have our own personality, shape, color, intersts...etc. huh, and they out of smartness gave you the super brilliant and only true answer in world which there is nothing like it...for Allah`s sake stop believing such ugly lies and be yourself..and never let others tell ya who you are...you are not stupid to believe whatever been said to you, you have a brain to think with for Allah`s sake...

I have never ever seen so much in this life but heard of them, does that mean they are not exists? and you don`t know every single woman in this world , do you? May Allah guide you Ameeeen

Third think : How come I think to have a sexual relation with any female ? I cant think it . My mother and sister's face and body come to my eyes Whenever I try to think it. Infect I cant look at any woman's face and I never look at any woman . Because its remind me my mother and sister . I am sorry . I cant .... I have many conception about woman . What to do ? I am help less ...

you are doing this to yourself my respected brother, and I know many people from men and women have been raped and abused sexualy in the past but now that have a normal life living happily with their wives , husbands and families, why? cause they refused to be losers , forgot the past reutrn to Allah and were so smart to have a bright future under the remebrance of Allah....May Allah make you from them Ameeeeeeeeen

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

my dear sister " Amat Allah " assala mu alaiqum ! I dont know how to stop seeing my past? . And how to stop imagine my mother and sister face on other woman ? How do I correct my self ? I dont know .

Wa Alikum Assalaam Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaatuh

you will know how my respected brother; when you realize that there is no benefit from remembering past and it is a great reason behind our failure and its is really preventing us from improving and deprive us from happiness and living a normal life...past would also give chances for satan to control us cause it is making us weak and depressed my Brother...if you want to improve your self successfully then try your best to forget those useless things and go on...life is not all about what happened for us in past , life has the present and future and if we lost the past then we must try our best to live our present and build for a bright future and never let past ruin our entire life this is not wise and it is a great waste...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

As you said I have to start step by step . I am offering Sallah regularly . And I enjoy it . I can read Quran . I will start it from tonight only before bed .

that a great and amazing thing to know , just keep going and walk ahead and never look back, try your best to be like that always and forever...you are doing great Ma shaa Allah, May Allah bless you and keep you firm Ameeeen
you will see how this will effect your soul and heart in shaa Allah just never give up trusting Allah and be strong always cause you are in shaa Allah...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

You have told me that I have to find out my hobby . I have to find out my interest . I thought a lot about it . And I found that, I like to expend time in the mosque . I like to offer Sallah and I like listen to recitation Quran not through audio but from direct recitation from people . I like to do Uddu . But the thing is why I like all those things ? Because I feel peace and secure and Uddu give me relaxation and it glows my face . So I am thinking I am not doing all those things because of Allah's order but for my pleasure and satisfaction which is not correct . Allah watch my intention , and my intention is satisfy my self which is not fair . I am feeling guilty . Please correct me ...

and you tell me, who guided you to all of what you love? Isn`t He Allah? and none would feel the pleasure and satisfaction when hearing Athiker and while being in Allah`s houses but whom has a beliving heart, none find peace in the rememberance of Allah but whom loves Allah, and your love for Allah and your great desire of pleasing Him The Exalted drove you to all of this so, you are not a hypocrite, you are a good believer and slave of Allah when doing this in shaa Allah ... Maybe you feel like that because you are in the begining of your way to Allah, but later you will realize how much you are attached and connected to your Lord my noble brother in shaa Allah...so, never feel guilty, you are still new and you will learn so much in shaa Allah...as all of us did and still learning...May Allah guide us all to Him always and forever Ameeen

Allah says:" O mankind, there has to come to you instruction from your Lord(I.e. Qur`aan) and healing for what is in the breasts and guidance and mercy for the believers. (57) " Surat Yunus

and says:" Say, "It is, for those who believe, a guidance and cure." And those who do not believe - in their ears is deafness, and it is upon them blindness. Those are being called from a distant place. (44) " Surat Fussilat

you enjoy listening to Qur`aan, feel comfort, peace and satisfaction so, you are not deaf or blind and what does that mean? it means you are a believer whom his heart filled of love for his Lord and what His Lord loves...

May Allah be with you always and forever and all the Ummah Ameeeen

Let us look at just one issue at a time. The best way to handle problems is to break them down into small steps and work on just one at a time. when we attempt to solve all of our problems at one time we tend to overwhelm our selves and only add an additional problem. Let us us narrow your last post down to just one workable step.

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

My answer is : I have brain but in that brain I have only Evil thoughts, Ego, Angry , Revenge feeling, Inferiority Complex , Injustice , Laziness , Cowardice ,Doubts and Suspect , Fear and Impatience many more Evil thoughts are available only . My brain is a Garbage only. As you said nothing comes without price . I don't have capability to pay the price for good things . So I request you , kindly help me to gain my capability to paying any price for any good deeds or good things . Show me the way how to gain it as fast and as easy as possible . I want to over come from my all evil thoughts and I want to clean my garbage brain and fill it with good thoughts and good deeds and love of Allah and Sasul and all human and jinn .

That can be reduced to one thought:

I want to over come from my all evil thoughts and I want to clean my garbage brain and fill it with good thoughts and good deeds and love of Allah and Sasul and all human and jinn .

That can be further simplified to:

I want to over come from my all evil thoughts

Now we have a single goal, that can be worked on and once accomplished will make it possible to move onward.

It is attainable to overcome our evil thoughts. The first step you have done is recognizing you have them. the second step is to have a desire to remove them. You have already taken the first 2, So now we begin in learning how to remove them.

Of course frequent Duas are the most important. Learn to be more specific in your duas and what is truly needed. The first is sabr, sabr is all important. These thoughts did not build up in one moment, they are the result of a long time of choices. Have sabr and know it will take time to remove them. So first made dua for sabr.

Attaining sabr is like catching a butterfly, the more you chase after it the faster it flies away from you. Learn calmness, learn to sit still and learn to enjoy making duas and then like a butterfly sabr will come to you.

Relax, be calm in your trust of Allaah(swt). Know that Allaah(swt) is the best of planners. Let Allaah(swt) run your life, he has been doing so for a long time and is more capable of it than you or I or any others.

Learning to fully trust Allaah(swt) is a good way to let sabr come to you.

May Allah love you my respected brother Woodrow always and forever and give you all the khayer of this life and the after life Ameeeen

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

Few years back one of my lady psychiatrist asked me few questions to find out my sexual orientation , in those questions one of the question was ; do I like to keep my personal hygiene ? And I replied yes ; I like to keep neat and clean my self and I like to do Uddu its make me refresh and bright . Then she told this is one of the symptoms of homosexual people; like to keep them self hygienic and looking batter . So now I am confuse , please clarify me ....

The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was always clean and neat always and was always teaching his companions (may Allah be pleased with them) to be, does that mean he was a homo (Astaghfero Allah, FAR BE it FROM HIM ), sub`haan Allah then I should jump in a muddy swamp and take no shower for years to prove to others that I am not homo cause who keep him/her self clean and neat are homo...what kind of thoughts are these? for Allah`s sake...you are clean and neat cause you are a good person taking care of yourself and Allah says:"Truly Allah loveth those who turn unto Him, and loveth those who have a care for cleanness. (222)" Surat Al Baqarah...so, Allah loves those who keep themselves clean and neat and those who always return to Him in repentance my respected brother...

and the prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him)said:" Cleanliness is half of faith and al-Hamdu Liliah (Praise be to Allah) fills the scale, and Subhan Allah (Glory be to Allah) and al-Hamdu Liliah (Praise be to Allah) fill upwhat is between the heavens and the earth, and prayer is a light, and charity is proof (of one's faith) and endurance is a brightness and the Holy Qur'an is a proof on your behalf or against you. All men go out early in the morning and sell themselves, thereby setting themselves free or destroying themselves".

Cleanliness is the half of the faith not a sign of homo, whom you would believe now? The Prophet of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) or your psyc?

keeping oneself clean and neat is the manner and deed of Messengers, Prophets (peace and blessings of Allah be upon them all) and righteous people too so, don`t let others put another wrong Ideas in your head...you are an amazing clean and neat believing person my respected brother ....May Allah bless you Ameeeen

you said you love Wudu so, look what the rewards of what you are doing my respected brother:

Abu Huraira reported: Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said: When a bondsman-a Muslim or a believer-washes his face (in course of ablution), every sin he contemplated with his eyes, will be washed away from his face along with water, or with the last drop of water; when he washes his hands, every sin they wrought will be effaced from his hands with the water, or with the last drop of water; and when he washes his feet, every sin towards which his feet have walked will be washed away with the water or with the last drop of water with the result that he comes out pure from all sins.

Uthman b. 'Affan reported: The Messenger of Allah (way peace be upon him) said: He who performed ablution well, his sins would come out from his body, even coming out from under his nails.

and there are many Hadeeths about cleanliness and Wudu showing how important are these and how they are increasing the Imaan (faith) inside the heart of the believer not to make him homo...laa hawla wa laa qowata illa bellah...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

My honorable sister ; I am very lazy , please show me the way how do I over come from my laziness . I am feeling bad because I am giving you trouble after trouble but I am not giving any money to you . In generally people lost interest if they don't get any rewards from any job . Please don't take it in negative way . I don't know what to say now . please forgive me if I have done any mistake . I really feel happy about your suggestion which you tell step by step . I am ready for it . please don't leave me

as our respected and dear brother Woodrow said: Duaa and Sabir (patience), Make a sincere Duaa to Allah to help you and give you Sabir and trust Allah and surely, you will never regret it my respected brother, the prophet Muhammd (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:" endurance is a brightness " what brightness my respecetd brother? the brightness which makes you see things clearly, showing you the right way and let you after Allah obtain what you are looking for successfully...

with Duaa try to teach yourself how to be patient not only making Duaa and wait with out doing your best to obtain it and that by rushing not and hasten not things ; step by step till you meet Allah while He is pleased with you Ameeeen

try to remind yourself always of Allah`s mercy and that He Is The One Who gave you the rope of surviving and now you have to hold it so strong and pull it so hard to reach the straight path of success and of Allah`s satisfaction Ya Rabb Ameeeeen

and don`t say this again, we believers seek not this dunya and its pleasures , we only seek Allah`s satisfaction and His special love for the believers, we love our brothers and sisters unconditionaly for Allah`s sake and you are not troubling me at all...and I told ya before by Allah`s Willing ; I won`t leave your side neither me nor everyone here...

May Allah be with you, give you Sabir , knowledge , Imaan , Taqwa and wiseness and May He The Exalted make you from the best of His righteous and pious slaves and servants and all the Ummah Ameeeen

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

Assala mu alaiqum ! " Amat Allah " I have no word to give you thinks . You all are great . You know my eyes started crying means tears automatically start dropping from my eyes whenever I read your reply . So,Again I will start keeping hygienic my self . Again I will start doing Halal things for batter looks . I will do 5 to 10 times Wudu in a day with minimum water . I believe in Allah and Mohammed ( pbuh) more then any body but some time I lose my believe , many confusion and doubt are often coming to my mind . And I have many questions . How do I over come from it?

Wa Alikum Assalaam Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaatuh

May Allah increase this love in your heart Ameeeen . everybody has his/her ups and downs my respected brother none is saint or an angel and we all sometimes have Qs need to be answered...if you have many Qs just ask them and by Allah`s Willing we will try our best to help ya...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

I am waiting for your reply that, how do I overcome from laziness ?

First of all : Make sincere Duaa to Allah for patience and guidance and trust Allah %100 and be patient in shaa Allah...

Second: try to follow these tips:

1- you have to find the reasons behind this laziness? what makes you refrain from doing a specefic thing and what is preventing you from going on and reach your goal? and I think your past is playing a role here once you forget about it then many of your troubles will be solved in shaa Allah...

2-think about how important to you is that thing you wana do or goal you wana reach; and see if it really deserves to be ignored and also seek others help if you need it to reach your goal to be able to do what you wana do, and if the way you are taking to make you reach that goal is hard then try to use another one and never try to make all things perfect from the first time, be patient always...

3-try to encourage yourself to do what you wana do and try to convince yourself that you can really do it and never let past ruin everything for you cause there is no need to dig old things out; there is no benefit of that, be creative and trust yourself after Allah and Say it loudly: I can do it , I can be productive, I can be a good slave of Allah by His Willing and Mercy...

4-don`t let anything disappoint you and try to do what you are able to do; not burdening yourself or affording yourself overloaded...

5-take all your time to do what you wana do and don`t do it all at once but step by step in a relaxed and controlled way and don`t take the second step till you attain success with the first one and till you are sure that you can take the second one, try always to focus in one thing at atime to neither distract yourself nor confuse it and never stress yourself...

6-when you finish one step successfuly, cheer yourself up and tell yourself how good you are for attaining this and say loudly : Al Hamdulillaaaaaaaah I done it by the grace and Mercy of Allah and encourage yourself to start with the new one determining to success and to go on till the end in shaa Allah and always know that big successes are just made up of many little continuous successes...May Allah give you success always and forever Ameeeen

7-never forget the rewards you will gain when you are trying and striving for Allah`s sake and also try to reward yourself for each successfull step with something you love and that would encourage you to go on and walk ahead taking the second step happily ...

8-when you finsih step one ; don`t delay taking the second one cause delaying this would make your energy decreases and fade away. The longer you delay re-starting, the harder it will be to re-start. But the sooner you re-start, the more confident you will feel and that will reinforce the positive behavior that leads to feeling that you can do anything in shaa Allah...

9-Never give up. It's one thing to find your motivation. But, it's another thing to keep it going when the going gets tough; especially when it's an unforeseen problem! The more avoidant you are, the more you will feel like giving up. How to get past the tough point? Tell yourself over and over: "I really want to get past this; I really want to overcome this", until you believe that you actually don't want to give up in shaa Allah...

10- try to take a break and when you do ; try to involve yourself in some activities like, doing some kind of sports, reading books, cooking...etc to avoid being bored...

11-make a board or hang up a small paper to write down your achievements and that will remind you how successful you are strong and can do anything you want in shaa Allah...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

One important mater is : long back age I went to an endocrinologist and he took some test , he found I have little bit hormonal imbalance in my body . But he didn't give any treatment , He said there are few people have such type of hormonal imbalance its not require any treatment . After that I didn't take another opinion . I heard from general people that, hormonal imbalance also a cause for homosexuality . So, please advice me about this ...

Allah knows about this but I am advicing you not to listen to all what people say and I know that hormonal imbalance cure is water after Allah, drink water as much as you can and you will see how alive and refreshed your body will be, Allah says:"And We have made from water every living thing". Surat Al Anbiyaa. water will solve after Allah so much of your body problems and will protect you from so much too after Allah and in shaa Allah you will see the difference with your body and you will feel so relaxed cause water cleans the body and help it to get rid of the toxins and be balanced in everything...

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

And I am confuse that my Job's intention is not for praise to Allah , its for my satisfaction and peacefulness ; which is not fair . Please correct me ....

this is satan trying to disappoint you and make you sad so, never give him your attention; he is under our feet and animals feet too so, let him be there and seek Allah`s refuge and protection from him whom Allah The Exalted said to him:"Then get out of it( Paradise), for indeed, you are expelled. (34) And indeed, upon you is the curse until the Day of Recompense." (35)" Surat Al Hijr so, never listeb to him he is in hell and he wants to drag us with him May Allah protect us all from him and all harms Ameeeeen

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

I didn't understand properly the reply of " WOODROW " , Can you make it more easy for me ?

Our respected brother Woodrow`s said:

format_quote Originally Posted by Woodrow

Let us look at just one issue at a time. The best way to handle problems is to break them down into small steps and work on just one at a time. when we attempt to solve all of our problems at one time we tend to overwhelm our selves and only add an additional problem. Let us us narrow your last post down to just one workable step.

then he (May Allah be pleased with him) summed up a part of what you wrote above at one point to work with it and find solutions to help you my respected brother step by step...and believe me he knows much than I do and he is wise and have much experience May Allah bles him Ameen

he said:

format_quote Originally Posted by Woodrow

Now we have a single goal, that can be worked on and once accomplished will make it possible to move onward It is attainable to overcome our evil thoughts. The first step you have done is recognizing you have them. the second step is to have a desire to remove them. You have already taken the first 2, So now we begin in learning how to remove them..

and then he May Allah love him Ameeen started telling you that it is possible to overcome our evil thoughts and continued to teach you how in steps:

first step: to recognize that you have those evil thoughts.
second step: to have the desire of removing those evil thoughts.
third: to learn how to remove them in shaa Allah.

and then he told ya that you already have taken the first and second steps ; you already recognized that you are having evil thoughts and you are already have the desire to remove them and now we have to work on the third step which is : how to remove them...

then he the respected said:

format_quote Originally Posted by Woodrow

Of course frequent Duas are the most important. Learn to be more specific in your duas and what is truly needed. The first is sabr, sabr is all important. These thoughts did not build up in one moment, they are the result of a long time of choices. Have sabr and know it will take time to remove them. So first made dua for sabr.

here he is telling you how important is to return to Allah in Duaa and never stop making Duaa( prayer and supplication) and he is advicing you to be specifec in your Duaa like: if you need guidance you make Duaa to Allah for guidance saying O Allah guide me and if needing patience you make duaa to Allah to give you patience and so ; the point is that you have to mention what you need in your duaa specifically and to insist making that Duaa over and over and over and never give up making Duaa plus trusting Allah...

and first thing and most important thing you need now and forever to solve all your problems is patience so, make Duaa to Allah to gain Sabir(patience) as much as you can and that is the begining of your way in solving your all troubles in shaa Allah...

format_quote Originally Posted by Woodrow

Attaining sabr is like catching a butterfly, the more you chase after it the faster it flies away from you. Learn calmness, learn to sit still and learn to enjoy making duas and then like a butterfly sabr will come to you.

then he is telling you that Sabir needs some time to be gained and obtained and you need to learn how to be calm and wise and how to enjoy making duaa and supplicate to Allah, then you won`t be forced to run after patience but you will gain it and taught to be patient in shaa Allah easily...

format_quote Originally Posted by Woodrow

Relax, be calm in your trust of Allaah(swt). Know that Allaah(swt) is the best of planners. Let Allaah(swt) run your life, he has been doing so for a long time and is more capable of it than you or I or any others. Learning to fully trust Allaah(swt) is a good way to let sabr come to you.

at the end he is reminding you: to be relaxed and calm and never give up trusting Allah The Exalted and that you gotta know and remember that Allah Is the best of planners so, let Him run your life but not others or things which happened and done and Allah Is the one who knows you and knows all you need and how to solve all your troubles you are suffering from perfectly and that when you fully trust Allah; Sabir and patience will be from your characters...

Humbly, this is what I understood from the precious advice of our noble brother Woodrow and I am asking you my respected brother Woodrow please to forgive me if I misunderstood anything or explained it in a wrong way and Allah knows the best...

Humbly:

Amat Allah.

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

Assala mu alaiqum !

My dear brother and sister . I am not seeing any ways to resolve my problem . I am feeling helpless :-

1) I am thinking : My problems are not so easy that , It can solve by the enter net . I need constant and continues support and guidance , which is not possible through internet . I don't think it can run . I will reach the same place from where I started .

2) I can do suicide for getting relive from my pain but I will loose this world as well as life after death . But this life's pain also not bearable .

3) I can give up my hope and I can live a gay life , which I don't want . It can not provide me real mantel peach . But I can get artificial peach which can help me to forget my pain and I may expend this life in a artificial way . Because there are enough resources enough organizations which can provide me unlimited practical as well as physical and psychological supports (24/7). But I will loose my life after death .

So, I request you kindly suggest which one I should choose .

If you see only those 3, the only choice becomes:

1) I am thinking : My problems are not so easy that , It can solve by the enter net . I need constant and continues support and guidance , which is not possible through internet . I don't think it can run . I will reach the same place from where I started .

Which does shows you recognize the most help has to come from people you can talk to face-to-face.

format_quote Originally Posted by hopeonallah

Assala mu aliqum ! " WOORDROW "

Thank you for your replay . But I did not get any reply from my last Query , You just repeating my question only with your answer . such as :

" If you see only those 3, the only choice becomes: "

" Which does shows you recognize the most help has to come from people you can talk to face-to-face."

I request you kindly review my query once again . Thank you ...

Each of us, is our own best source at finding the answers to our problems.

Typically we all know the answers to our problems. But we do not like the answer and seek to find other sources to give us more acceptable choices. Your queries give strong evidence that you already know what needs to be done. It is a very difficult thing to do, so you are hoping we can find alternate choices.

The only one who knows you better than you know yourself is Allaah(swt). No human outside of you knows the inner pains you feel or the even exactly what you see as being the problem.

Look deep into yourself and see exactly what changes you must make to resolve your problem. The answer really is within your own thoughts. Once you understand that only you can resolve your problems pray for Allaah(swt) to give you the strength and sabr to push forward with doing so and never look back.