I dont have tawkkul. Feels like im constant fear...of someting that doesnt exsist (i.e i fear for no reason) i fear of losing my iman to please the people. jannah is a valuable "possosseion" and it requires valuable deeds and efforts something im not sure that i posses. I want my heart to be strong and for Allah to be my priority no matter how many people may not like my ways. How do i put Allah above the people and above my own self (fears, etc).
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it is a hard position to be in. the good news is that you fear loosing your emaan, not worldly temporary things such as career, knowledge etc. some people, perhaps myself as well, fear loosing life, accomplishments, loosing it all to death for eternity etc and it is clearly due to diminished levels of tawakkul.
I think you can increase dependence reliance/tawakkul on Allah by going back to basics: reaffirming your tawheed and thinking about your existence of life frmo humble beginnings from your mother's womb.
Help me to escape from this existence
I yearn for an answer... can you help me?
I'm drowning in a sea of abused visions and shattered dreams
In somnolent illusion... I'm paralyzed
I dont have tawkkul. Feels like im constant fear...of someting that doesnt exsist (i.e i fear for no reason) i fear of losing my iman to please the people. jannah is a valuable "possosseion" and it requires valuable deeds and efforts something im not sure that i posses. I want my heart to be strong and for Allah to be my priority no matter how many people may not like my ways. How do i put Allah above the people and above my own self (fears, etc).
Asalaamu Alaikum, what do you mean when you say "to please the people"? How are these people affecting you and in what way? what relationship do you have with them?
This suggests to me that you are indeed from the people of AlNafs Al Lawama; a soul that constantly blames itself for not being the best it can. Alhamduli'Allah. This is a good indication. i think that you should see what gaps you are not filling, and ask Allah to make you acknowledge and fix your flaws. Every human being has flaws, but the championship is when you acknowledge and strive to improve yourself. Help others Allah will help you; remember the sick, the poor and Allah will reach out bountifully to you. Make a scheduale of Sadaqa to be done every 2 days in a week (i suggest mondays and thursdays), try fasting in the 14 15 and 16 ( known as the white days) in the Islamic monthly character. Have hope; Allah says: (whoever comes close to me a span , I come close to him by a cubit, and if My slave comes to me walking ,I come to him running)
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