need some knowledge!!!

Assalamu'alaikum.

Sis, why you need references about wife and husband rights in Islam?. To make your husband know?. He's already know about it, I am sure. However, he is under pressure by his family that always ask money from him. So, do not thinking like a lawyer in court that beat the rival with references.

Family ask money to the husband is common happen in my place too, Indonesia. However, without intention to despise men in other culture, husbands in my place are better in handling this situation because they are independent people who can take decision by themselves.

When I was kid sometime I saw my dad family asked money from him. But he did not always gave money, and not always refuse, depending on what the money for, and effect of that 'donation' to my family financial condition. My mother understood my dad decision when he gave money. Until few weeks ago, my brother was in financial trouble. I often gave him money because I knew his situation. My wife knew it, and she understood. Of course, my dad and I would not give money if only to support extravagant life or if the 'donation' would make the receiver become lazy.

Frankly, in a thread I criticized the husband in another area because mostly of them are not independent, but always under control by their origin family after they got married. Of course, it make their families easy to press them to support laziness or extravagant life.

Sis, what you should do is motivate your husband to becomes independent husband who can take decision by himself. The best decision for all, not only for one party.

Wife is not servant who serve the husband and get paid, but the co-driver of an ark that called "marriage". Yes, the husband is the main driver who drive this ark, but the wife has duty to keep this ark is always running on the right path. If the driver make mistake, co-driver should remind him.

Not easy to make your husband becomes independent person. But always remind him, he has responsibility to drive this 'ark' to always run on the right path. Remind your husband that your kids (whether you already have, or have not) need much money for their life in the future, like for education, etc. So, your husband should save money for the future.

The good husband is the husband who always fulfill what his wife need. But the good husband is not husband who always give what his wife wants. If his wife want to have new dresses, new sofa, the good husband would buy it if he has money for it. But if the wife want to have new car, and the kids need education cost, the good husband would refuse his wife request, and use money for his kids education cost that more important.