I'm getting old and feel the pressure to marry but I just dont want to marry the first guy that comes with a proposal. Before I used to get alot of proposals when I was a teenager but my parents said no and I was studying.
Now I dont get proposals and I'm quite a shy girl so not alot of people know me. I don't want to go back home and find someone. Dont get me wrong its just a personal preference. I've not started earning properly and it will take about 2 years for me to start earning a decent wage. Then it would take him 2 years to come and men can get upto all sorts when waiting for 2 years.
Thats another fear I have: getting cheated on. I know women cheat too and it's hidden but I'm not one to cheat.
I really want to get married. But I feel like I have nothing to offer. Self esteem and Self confidence is low. I dont show pic's because I'm not comfortable and think they're haram too so how would I get a proposals? My parents don't have too many contacts here either. I dont want to find someone my self either because it could go wrong.
Those girls who are married how did you meet your spouse? I know some people say through friends and that means searching their facebook friends list. Well I'm not on facebook.
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Re: Worried about getting married dont have any hope?
Assalamu Alaikum
When you stop worrying, everything will come to you inshallah. Place your trust in Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. Do the things you'd want to do regardless of whether you'd have a husband or not. Don't worry about getting cheated on either. Inshallah you will be sent a god-fearing man who will love you and be kind to you.
Why do you have such low self confidence??
You are worrying too much about this. Marriage is a blessing from Allah and you should be happy that not everyone is throwing themselves at you asking you to marry them, because girls get caught up in that and don't pick the right person. Allah might be saving someone special for you (:
Sometimes while you are doing something that you love, you can find someone who has the same likes as you. Basically just live your life right now and hope for the best. If you sit there and worry all the time, it will just make you feel sad, lonely, and paranoid. You won't get anywhere!
You asked how to meet a good husband, honestly, that's how I met mine. I always prayed sincerely asking allah to send me someone who is good for me and I'm good for him who will help me in my deen and vice versa, and that's as far as looking into marriage that I got. Everything else was just me living my life not worrying about how it happened or who it would be cuz I just had full trust in Allah it will be one if His great servants since only He knows who they are. (:
Allah made everyone different thats what makes them special,so no matter what ppl say just remember you're SPECIAL!! "You are with the one you love"
Nem0
Re: Worried about getting married dont have any hope?
Oh my dear sister, don't dispair! Insha'Allaah sooner or later the right guy for you will come along, just make Du'a to Allaah.
Ask your parents to look for you if you want, and ask your friends too, they may be able to help. Nowadays it's mainly about appearances unfortunately so photographs of potential brides and grooms are always asked for and passed around, maybe if you requested to your parents and friends that your photo should only be shown to the males who are Allaah-fearing and Salaah-reading. What do you think?
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
Thats another fear I have: getting cheated on. I know women cheat too and it's hidden but I'm not one to cheat.
Well adultery is Haraam, and yes unfortunately some Muslims have fallen into this sin, may Allaah forgive them, you have to be honest with the person and ask for truth from them too, and based on what they say, you have to take it at word value and only Allaah will know the truth. You will have to trust and place your faith in the answers too.
Don't worry, the fear is normal, but place your faith utterly and completely in Allaah and you will never ever go wrong, no matter what this life has in store for you
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
Those girls who are married how did you meet your spouse?
Through family... And I felt sooo comfortable with him when I met him the first time (my husband) and I had this feeling that I can live the rest of my life with this guy, through all the ups and downs, and we will still be strong It was a gut instinct.
Alhamdulillah coming up to five years together now, in a couple of days
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