Is it wrong to stay in a house with non-mahrams?

**Trying2bbetter** · 06-26-2013

AOA everyone,

My bestest friends are all getting together for what will, most probably be, the last time ever. There are 5 of us who all live in different countries. I’m only staying with them for 4 days (out of 2 weeks) but on the 1st day I’ll be there, the girl who’s house we are staying at is having 3 uni friends over as well (we don’t know them, & 2 are guys). It was the only day she could meet up with them, & 2 of my best friends said they didn’t have a problem with it, so she went ahead with the plan. They will be staying for the weekend, but only 1 night out of the 4 nights when I will be allowed to stay with my best friends.

The thing is, although I know she must have good friends, I don’t feel comfortable about it because of a number of reasons. It will mean I’ll have to lie to my family, something I don’t want to do because, well, I’ve had my fair share of hiding things and I’m trying to be good now. I trust my friend to have decent friends, and I trust myself too. But I don’t want to do anything that displeases Allah. I’ve kinda figured the best way to have a happy & peaceful (i.e. successful) life in this world, & the next, is to follow Allah’s rules. The girl’s mum knows, but not her dad. No one else’s’ parents know.

This might sound like a stupid question, but is it haraam to stay in a house where there are non-mahrams? Not in the same room, but same house? I thought I’d just visit them in the day and go back to my relatives at night, and then stay with them for the remaining 3 nights once her uni friends leave. I have the option to stay the night as well, by hiding things, but I don’t think I should. I would just like some sort of backing to know that I am doing this to please Allah. I’m usually left out in all the sleepovers & I always feel like staying (obviously always only girls). I don’t want to feel like that this time though, if the 2 guys are there. Knowing that it is against Allah’s will can help me get over any *I wish* feelings. Even if I’m there, supposing I really feel like staying the night, I will able to easily convince myself not to, by remembering it is for Allah.

Thanks for reading this, and for all the help.

**Alpha Dude** · 06-26-2013

Wa alaykum salam,

Ma sha Allah for trying to stay away from sin. In my humble opinion, you should not stay the night that these guys are over, irrespective of whether it is technically halal or haram.

Don't do it, sister. The bottom line is that it is a very grey area and you should err on the side of caution. You have 3 nights with your friends already so you wouldn't be missing out much.

**Muhammad** · 06-26-2013

^ Those are my thoughts too. By staying away from it, you will avoid the feeling of guilt and discomfort for the reasons you mentioned, and you can feel at ease during the time that you are there. Whoever sacrifices something for the sake of Allaah

, Allaah

will certainly compensate them with something better.

...And whoever fears Allah - He will make for him of his matter ease. That is the command of Allah , which He has sent down to you; and whoever fears Allah - He will remove for him his misdeeds and make great for him his reward. [At-Talaq: 4-5]

May Allaah

grant us all the ability to please Him and fear Him as He deserves, Aameen.

**Trying2bbetter** · 06-26-2013

Thank you so much for the replies, it's really helped me. Please don't judge my friends, they aren't bad or anything >> I'm known as the stupid one, they're all very (street) smart. And they are all quite good Muslims too, despite their decisions above - in fact better Muslims than me.

You are both right. Thank you for all the help, God bless you all.