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Mother's controlling behavior is driving me nuts and not sure how to respectfully

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    anonymous's Avatar Restricted Member
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    Mother's controlling behavior is driving me nuts and not sure how to respectfully

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    My mother has been very controlling and obsessively annoying. I am in mid twenties and feel like a grown man and have a beard. Yet she dictates where I go and who I see. How can I respectfully tell her to stop it. She is getting on my nerves and its gotten to the point where I want to scream at her. I started going to the mosque regularly and my family is not as religious or practicing. They dislike the fact I am practicing. See me as extreme and crazy and keep saying you will get Corona and you will get sick. I take precautions like glove, and we pray 6 feet apart. However she still is on my nerves. She is constantly yelling at me and I am sick of being treated this way. Any time I stand up for myself, I'm hurled with insults and abuse of emotional and verbal. Its so toxic. I had a few health issues and she constantly rubs it on my face. Don't cry or be upset if you get sick or are dying. Sickness comes from Allah and if I get sick because I went to the masjid then Alhamdullah. It is what Allah decreed but I enjoy going to the mosque yet she is always constantly asking where I am going and who am I seeing. This obsession is driving insane. Once she was asking who was I texting and I got upset and snapped and said none of your business. Again I was hurled with your not mature...your a horrible child.
    Mother's controlling behavior is driving me nuts and not sure how to respectfully

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    Re: Mother's controlling behavior is driving me nuts and not sure how to respectfully

    Assalamu alaykum.

    Always stay calm with your mother, no matter how much she will get you mad. Do it for Allah.

    Unfortunately many parents get bothered by their practicing children. I don't know why. But perhaps you can play it smart and try to get on her good side so that things can ease up between you two?

    Although it may annoy you, just try to answer her when she asks you questions like "where are you going?", "who are you texting?" and if she starts getting angry and yelling at you or controlling you, stay calm and try to ignore it.

    If you have your own duties to do, she shouldn't stop you from it.. Try talking things out with her about the masjid.. Maybe shes scaared of you or herself getting COVID19?

    Patience is key in these situations. Try to be smart and get on her good side too
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    Mother's controlling behavior is driving me nuts and not sure how to respectfully

    Peace be upon you,

    The important thing is to remain patient because they’re your parents. Remember that remaining patient will get you lots of reward, just as attending the masjid.

    Also think of it this way, if you’re attending the masjid and you’re also answering back, your parents will think that Islam is making you like that. Instead, be patient and smile. They’ll see how wonderful you’ve become and perhaps ease up.

    In terms of safety against COVID-19, tell them that you’re taking proper precautions.

    Try to understand the root of why your parents disapprove your actions. Maybe its more of a safety issue.

    Hope that helps.
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