I try not to, but sometimes how can u not?? I mean, like when u r out/college/school/work u talk to opposit gender, and hey if they talk to u then u gotta reply...and sometimes u gotta talk to others for various reason, and then it kinda get carried away...but i think islamic way is really good and we should follow it, because it sustains u from other sins like adultery/crush etc
salamualikum
all i can say is have sabr and inshallah just think about it is this dude going to go with you and safe you? if so keen then get married inshallah. I don't have much to say on this issue
ma'assalama
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
format_quote Originally Posted by Anonymous Tester
i need help,,,,im nt a good muslim , wel da reason is cuz i hav a boyfriend and i dunt no wah to do, i do alot of finks im nt proud of ,bt cnt stop, he says he loves me n i cnt break his heart ,he wil reli be saaaad i cntt do it ,im nt dat heartless bt i do want to be a good muslimah, plzz if u hav any ideas or anyfink or can help me i wil aprreacite it
thank you
sis first Alhamdulillah its really good that you wanna make Allah subhanahu wata'ala happy, try your best to realise first and foremost that by trying to keep your bf happy your making Allah, in whos hand is your destiny, unhappy. By making Allah unhappy... things could get ugly! Also if you make him happy, he may give you something far greater then that which you already have.
ok lets think abuot the balance here:
if you keep your bf happy by staying with him you also:
1. make your parents sad ( if they should ever find out)
2. Make your image worser
3. prevent yourself from the true and sincere worship of Allah
4. thus stop yourself from ever truelly making Allah happy
( THIS COULD RESULT IN GOING TO HELL AUDHUBILLAH)
and if you giv up this relation then:
1. Mercy will flow through (trust me i've experienced this)
2. Allah will bestow upon you something much greater (inshaAllah)
3. You will live a honest life
4. Allah will be happy with you
(this could result in going to heaven )
Whats the point of a bf sis, look if its possible marry da geezah (ONLY if his willing to completely change into a true muslim) but if its not, then do that which is best in pleasing Allah inshaAllah
-
My tears testify that i have a heart
yet i feel me and shaytan never part
-
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
Well, I have to said that Allah Ta'ala is coming first than people..Allah loves those who are keep on the straight path to His Wills...I think it is easy to tell you, you can explain to your bf about this and l hope he will understand...be strong woman!
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
If you dont want to break with him, then explain to him that it is Islamicly wrong for you to be seeing each other and communicating when not needed, and come to some sort of agreement regarding marriage, and if you are not ready for marriage then stop communicating untill you are ready for marriage.
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
format_quote Originally Posted by Anonymous Tester
i need help,,,,im nt a good muslim , wel da reason is cuz i hav a boyfriend and i dunt no wah to do, i do alot of finks im nt proud of ,bt cnt stop, he says he loves me n i cnt break his heart ,he wil reli be saaaad i cntt do it ,im nt dat heartless bt i do want to be a good muslimah, plzz if u hav any ideas or anyfink or can help me i wil aprreacite it
thank you
Alhamdulilah sister you realize your mistakes. Thank Allah for this knowledge and ask Him to guide you.
You don't want to break your bf heart. That’s understandable. When we get close to someone we don't want to hurt them. But think about this, Allah does more for us, more than even our parents. Even at times of our extreme disobedience He doesn’t stop taking care of us. Just think about this for a moment. Think about your comfortable life, your health and all the blessings He gave you. Think about all of your disobedience yet He is so Merciful, so Forbearing. May Allah forgive us for our heedlessness. Ameen.
Now tell me who deserves your love more, Allah or a human being who will abandon you to face Allah alone in the Day of Judgment.
May Allah give us the ability to realize our mistakes and change our lives according to the Qur'an and Sunnah. Ameen.
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
Although I can see most of the replies have encouraged the sister to end the relationship completley, Islamicly that is not the only solution available.
If both are serious about the relationship then the Brother can arrange for someone on his behalf to contact the 'Wali' of the sister.
However if they are not at that stage and are not ready for marriage then they can just end all forms of communication untill they are ready for marriage.
If the sister can stop all form of communication for the sake of Allah untill they are ready for marriage then no doubt this will be a way for her to attain the happiness of Allah.
So in conclusion ending the relationship is not the only option available.
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
salamualikum.
what does 'wali' mean? and the sis can like get married to him so in that case she is doing the islamically way then again Allah hu alim
^ brother i just want to say if the sis doesn't end her relationship then erm what more should she do if she doesn't get married and chats to him thats still wrong, but in one case she can have a her brother or someone sat with her and talk then.
ma'assalama
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
format_quote Originally Posted by Kittygyal
salamualikum.
what does 'wali' mean? and the sis can like get married to him so in that case she is doing the islamically way then again Allah hu alim
ma'assalama
A 'Wali' is the guardian of the girl, usualy the father, and yes if she gets married without committing further sin then indeed that is islmaicly correct, however she would still need to repent for the wrongs she did before she got married, as in spending time with him, or communicating to him without the need.
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
format_quote Originally Posted by Sunni Student
A 'Wali' is the guardian of the girl, usualy the father, and yes if she gets married without committing further sin then indeed that is islmaicly correct, however she would still need to repent for the wrongs she did before she got married, as in spending time with him, or communicating to him without the need.
salamualikum.
okay, so once she gets married to the dude she needs to ask for forgivness right?
ma'assalama
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
format_quote Originally Posted by Kittygyal
^ brother i just want to say if the sis doesn't end her relationship then erm what more should she do if she doesn't get married and chats to him thats still wrong, but in one case she can have a her brother or someone sat with her and talk then.
ma'assalama
Yes if she doesnt get married and continues communicating to him that would be wrong, thats why I mentioned in my post if she is not ready for marriage they should end all forms of communication untill they are ready for marriage.
And yes she can meet him in company of a Mahram [A non marriable male relative]
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
salaam
elo ello
sista, its good u realised . you got b straight to the point, what would you rather hav a few days of tears or a long time of burnin in the hellfire, bcos if u carry it on then thats wot wil happen.
inshallah end it and tel him to b a good muslim then lata on in life if u stil hav same feelins then get married init but sista all these bf/gf relations alwys end badly lol and both get bad image,but you can end it on a good note so do it, do it, do it
hope u make rite choice
Jaa-Ro-Nee-Mo!!!
"they ask you when will the help of Allah (swt) come! Certainly Allah (Swt) help is always near"
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
format_quote Originally Posted by Sunni Student
Yes if she doesnt get married and continues communicating to him that would be wrong, thats why I mentioned in my post if she is not ready for marriage they should end all forms of communication untill they are ready for marriage.
And yes she can meet him in company of a Mahram [A non marriable male relative]
salamualikum.
But may i ask as a muslim we shouldn't be looking at the opposite sex right? so even if there was a mahram isn't it still kinda bad to look at the opposite sex? just kinda curious
ma'assalama
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
format_quote Originally Posted by Kittygyal
salamualikum.
okay, so once she gets married to the dude she needs to ask for forgivness right?
ma'assalama
Well she should do repent now, but one of the conditions of repentance is having the intention to not commit that same sin again, so if the sis repents but does not have the intention of ending her communication with him then such repentance is not valid.
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
format_quote Originally Posted by Kittygyal
salamualikum.
But may i ask as a muslim we shouldn't be looking at the opposite sex right? so even if there was a mahram isn't it still kinda bad to look at the opposite sex? just kinda curious
ma'assalama
It should be with the intention of finding out more about the person you are considering getting married to, and this is from the sunnah and has been reccomended by the Prophet [peace be upon him]
If this were not the case, you would have to get married to someone without even seeing them!
Re: i hav a bf , hw do i break up wit him need help plzzz
salam all
thank u all for ur kind help, first im only 16 n second i fink he wud marry me bt my family wil never let mee, no wayy,!! my parents r into education n no marriage before dat, n da guy is muslim too, im scared cuz i nver done dis before, im kinda of a softy,
anywz i wil try my best cuz i wana do wats rit , insha allah mak dua for me plzz ,to help me choose da rit path n da rit decision
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, bcos if u carry it on then thats wot wil happen.
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