I've been on and off Islam for a couple years now. I think it's because I have ADD, OCD, or something but everything seems so impossibly hard. Ok, start with 5 pillars, most important thing to do is salat...but salat has gajillions steps and you have to be perfectly clean. Ok, how to be clean...so many different things i can't remember and I do the wrong order and then I'm reading the prayers from paper and I don't even say the arabic and it takes a horribly long time and 5 times a day? oh wait, i think i just nullified the prayer b/c i farted, gotta start over from the beginning. And so forth. And if I try fasting I get really sick and to think I have to make up for about 3 years of Ramadans already...I'll never be able to afford that..does anyone else have these issues? or am i truly an idiot? it's so overwhelming but everytime i leave islam life is even worsehttp://www.islamicboard.com/images/smilies/cry.gif
:'(
Why leave Islam? I understand that you have these problems and they are probably making you think that you are leaving Islam but I dont think so. It is just wiswaas. Get help from therapists for your OCD an ADHD. I have a sister who has this and she controls it by seeing counsellors and readint the Quran helps big time. There are group therapists around the country. With regards to your worship, do the best you can and be sincere. Read Islamic literature and read the 3 Quls and Ayatul Kursi when you leave home and when you sleep.
look..just please please try and do what i say...please..it seems to me u are so fed up and pissed at everything...u must understand that these are all very little things which make up bigger things.
spread out your prayer mat....
go down to sacda...
talk to God...tell him everything u just told us....
cry and scream to him...
then get up...make a list of all the fields in islam u need to get fixed up and work and...(this may take long and put u off coz it may never end..but believe me, we are all the same)...its just that shaytan is reaching u from this field...the moment u hear such negatives...tell him u are a muslim and tell him he aint gna win u ova...
make that list...and seek help one by one...remmeber, u will probabaly never perfect them...but who can? it is all intention...Allah knows u, ur problems, ur ADD, ETC...and will judge u accordingly..everyone has their own special judgement and test in this and next world.
remmeber, none of us were born perfect...none of us were born with wudu either...i remmeber my days of "did i just fart"...we all live it...i still have my "is my lip bleeding etc", "did i just pray 3rakah instead of 4..."moments...nearly everyday...IGNORE EM...if u are uncertain, it is most probably from shaytaan...he knows ur weakness...just continue, do what u can and let Allah do the rest...
u will probably never turn out like a sahabe...neither will any of us...but we can take steps to perfect our own situations...if ur perfect is relitavely crap to someones elses..so be it...just try YOUR best...and never give up.
work on each little step one by one. look at the smaller picture rather than the bigger one...and ignore the voices...remmeber...Allah knows you and what u are going thru...and so does shaytaan...u will choose who wins...
Pray to Allah for patience, ease, guidence,and understanding...
dnt give up...and dnt give up ur mission to get better, or the shaytan will pull u lower and lower
peace...keep in touch.
salams.
"'Cause I hear the whispered words
In your masterpiece beautiful
You speak the unspeakable through
I love you too"
It's your sincerity that counts at the end of the day, and on the day of Judgement, we as Muslims must bring before God above all a heart that is sound. We love God and what He commands for us, so we try our very best to fulfil our duties as near to perfection as we can. You can see that desire to do things just right in the number and frequency of threads started in this forum alone, with people asking about the minutae of prayer or fasting etc. So it's important to do things right, but if you are getting in to such a state of being overwhelmed by it all that you leave Islam, then that is going too far.
If you have OCD or ADHD, it's not your fault, you can't be responsible for something that is out of your control, and if you really feel you have a problem like that I think it would be a good idea to get a definitive diagnosis, so you know exactly what you are dealing with. In Islam, there are so many concessions made for us, like altered prayer movements for people who are bedridden, or different wudu for people with skin disease, so I mean why should there not be allowance made for other problems like ADHD? Only a scholar can answer that for us, but a good start would be to understand exactly the nature of the problem.
I've been on and off Islam for a couple years now. I think it's because I have ADD, OCD, or something but everything seems so impossibly hard. Ok, start with 5 pillars, most important thing to do is salat...but salat has gazillions steps and you have to be perfectly clean. Ok, how to be clean...so many different things i can't remember and I do the wrong order and then I'm reading the prayers from paper and I don't even say the arabic and it takes a horribly long time and 5 times a day? oh wait, i think i just nullified the prayer b/c i farted, gotta start over from the beginning. And so forth. And if I try fasting I get really sick and to think I have to make up for about 3 years of Ramadans already...I'll never be able to afford that..does anyone else have these issues? or am i truly an idiot? it's so overwhelming but everytime i leave islam life is even worse
:'(
It is the intentions my sister that really count, all you can do is your best.
Do NOT let anyone tell you otherwise!
Sometime when I am harrassed, I, too get confused and all muddled-up
.but salat has gajillions steps and you have to be perfectly clean. Ok, how to be clean...so many different things i can't remember and I do the wrong order and then I'm reading the prayers from paper and I don't even say the arabic and it takes a horribly long time and 5 times a day?
no no no you've got it all wrong. it is as hard as you wanna make it really. dont look at what you have to do, look at the benefits of it. look at what your life could be without it. both in this world and the hereafter.
think about it this way: if the prophet (sallalahu aleyhi wa salam) and teh sahahbah (radiallahu anhum) could do it, so can you. okay so you're probably thinking, but those peoples iman is soo strong. i say, correct. but if its not those peoples examples that you are going to follow, then whose??
and aside from them , what about all those average muslims these days that seem to get through praying without an hassle??
Last edited by Ummu Sufyaan; 10-06-2007 at 04:15 AM.
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