he should discuss it with her and make her understand.but the worst punishment my hubby could give me is not to talk to me no that would be very hard lol
i dont have problem with my husband that could lead to punishment at the moment st least, but it's just a question that comes to my mind because a lot of women that i know tell me about home discipline between them and they husbands .One of my friends yesterday visited me ans she was talking about a set of rules that her husband set in the house and that when she breaks any of them she's punished and she was saying that allah (swt) has even said that in quran and that bring me the idea of this thread to ask how is that. But personally i do solve every thing with my husband by communication only one problem that i got it was carried for a while because of luck of contact but solved at the end.
format_quote Originally Posted by sevgi
If you are a woman who talks or complains too much...he's gna bash you in any chance he gets
Really i do complain a lot but hamdulilah i didnt get bashed yet
People are saying that communication ought to be what solves it. I agree with that to an extent, but what if the action taken by the wife (or vice versa) was such that it wouldn't be possible to solve it by communication? If a guy's wife were to upset him by doing something that he expressly forbids her from doing and she does it anyway, do you think he'd be in the mood for "talking" about it? Pfft, if it were me, I'd be annoyed and probably give her the cold shoulder for a while, until she realises that she's upset me. Refusing to share the bed is also another thing a guy might try, just to let her know that he is upset with her.
Really, who here honestly feels in the mood to "talk" and "communicate" when they are feeling annoyed/upset?
Nobody told you to talk about it in the heat of the moment, Alpha.
Obviously you would wait till the heat is off. Knowing men, he will probably scream at her when he finds out about her 'ill-doing' and then feel really bad about it later, at which point he will come to apologise and she too will apologise and the communication will proceed.
In my head anyway. I wouldn't know better. If I were the husband, I probably wouldn't scream. I don't think I know how to.
"'Cause I hear the whispered words
In your masterpiece beautiful
You speak the unspeakable through
I love you too"
That's just it, though. In the heat of the moment, not talking about it and ignoring her would be my 'punishment'.
So you wouldn't even scream at her? You'd just stare blankly until she comes and says sorry? What if she is sorry when she comes upto you and tells you about what she has committed?
Last edited by sevgi; 02-17-2009 at 02:19 PM.
"'Cause I hear the whispered words
In your masterpiece beautiful
You speak the unspeakable through
I love you too"
Actually in islam there are steps in bringing the wife back to senses... lol now i've too google
25:36 And the true servants of the Most Merciful are those who walk the earth with humility and when the ignorant address them, they respond with words of peace.
Ideally, I'd be all forgiving and say "aww, it's okay".
But say it's something very serious that I've drilled into her mind that she must not to at any cost, yet she still goes ahead and does it? I'd be very annoyed and I'm sure others would feel the same way, if they were in the same situation with their wife/husband.
How would the annoyance manifest itself? Different for different people, I guess. Guys would generally tend to shout and women would display passive agression for a while (you know, pretend that everything is "fine", but act annoyed) then eventually they'd blow.
If it were me, I'd try and avoid her as much as possible and yeah, I would feel compassion that she feels sorry over it and would go back and make up with her later.
Realistically speaking, both men and women would find their ways of "punishment", they just wouldn't think of it as being punishment.
You know, if a woman does something her husband is utterly opposed to, she is probably 'punishing' him for something he has done to upset her. If this is the case, she wouldn't be sorry and he'd get angry for no reason.
Hah.
"'Cause I hear the whispered words
In your masterpiece beautiful
You speak the unspeakable through
I love you too"
not talking about it and ignoring her would be my 'punishment'
A husband and wife were not talking after a row. But the husband needed the wife to wake him up in the morning. Rather than asking her he gave her a note saying, please wake me up at 5am, I need to catch a plane for a business trip.
The husband woke up at 9am and was furious with his wife for not waking him up.
However on his bedside table was a note from his wife saying, wake up it is 5 am.
These women they always have to write the last note, and have the last word.
a husband and wife were not talking after a row. But the husband needed the wife to wake him up in the morning. Rather than asking her he gave her a note saying, please wake me up at 5am, i need to catch a plane for a business trip.
The husband woke up at 9am and was furious with his wife for not waking him up.
However on his bedside table was a note from his wife saying, wake up it is 5 am.:d
these women they always have to write the last note, and have the last word.
Take care
eric
Oh zing!
I wish I could do that. I always feel bad. I've never held a grudge. I wish I could. I do.
"'Cause I hear the whispered words
In your masterpiece beautiful
You speak the unspeakable through
I love you too"
what kind of 'wrong'? depending on the 'wrong', the Quran addresses this:
Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allâh and to their husbands), and guard in the husband’s absence what Allâh orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband’s property). As to those women on whose part you see ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allâh is Ever Most High, Most Great.
4:34
Our Lord! Verily, we have heard the call of one calling to Faith: 'Believe in your Lord,' and we have believed.
Our Lord! Forgive us our sins and expiate from us our evil deeds, and make us die (in the state of righteousness) along with Al-Abrar
Alpha I am aware that of course the wife or husband wouldnt want to talk at the time but after they will need to resolve their issues rather than ignore each other forever or be foolish towards each other.
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i got a question it may be funny for some people but it is really a question that goes all the time in my mind.
no that would be very hard lol
Re: husband and wife
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