A woman should have 99 good characters to make her husband happy

format_quote Originally Posted by Iqram

'It's the wife's duty to be as good as possible for the husband while he lazes around being selfish"

Sounds good to me

format_quote Originally Posted by *noor

i'm not talking about being cooked well.

"Learn how to cook good" is grammatically incorrect because you need to describe a verb using an adverb, and good is an adjective

and that is why is said cook well

sorry for going off topic!

Sis, I think I notice that, but I rather have my gramatically incorrect statement when it mean's food that taste Good rather food that is cooked well.

We improvise with our words here in ENGLAND. All is good, unless when being serious. LOL

p.s I find it amusing to argue over grammar.

hola,

i believe there are four importat qualities for womanhood...

i think a woman should first be a spiritual companion to her husband... lightly enjoininng him to good and helping him stay away from evil... next i think a woman must bring her husband honor, children and happiness... i rank these things separate because i believe any matter of God or divine things is first in importance, but i believe maintaining your husbands honor and providing him with children and happyness are very important things which should not be considered "relegated" to second things...

for me it is difficult pleasing my husband but honoring him at the same time... i think dress is an important issue for example... i dress much more modestly in public, and when we go out to things that i know are important to him such as events or family functios, because i know that the way i dress reflects on him and i want the world to think of me as a faithful wife, this shows that my husband has a strong house and demonstrates that i respect him as a man and husband, which brings him honor and i feel that is an important thing... i also try not to disagree with him in front of other people so that i am showing my respect for him... it is very important for me to bring my husband honor.

but that is a public matter... privately it is important (at least to me) to be intimate with my husband so i dress and act differently, but just for him... pleasure within a marital setting (and within the good boundaries of the Holy Catholic Church) is not dirty, it is clean pure and natural. flowing from this i also want to have children with him, because i know children are important to him and i think relations in marriage are for this purpose... so being pleasing and bearing children is an important quality of womanhood in my mind...

i know from a "feminist perspective" such ideas are antiquated and ignorant... but i consider myself an intelligent person and i feel that the biblical examples of family could never be antiquated... i believe in a family based on a male patriarch and a companion wife... equal in how much God loves us, but still submissive to her husband... because we are made to be the companions of men...

out of all creation we are the only ones that Gods most important and chosen creation requested out of the loneliness of his heart... women are beings of pure happiness and light. God made us to be good companions in all ways and i think anything that enjoins that principle is a good quality of a woman...

Dios te bendiga

yaa amirah, yaa mawadah, transaltion fadhlaan

*hides away*

wasalaam

can someone plz translate this....its been over 2 months....plz, plz, pretty plz....

enjoy these until then

Woman's Rights and Duties in Islam

The man and the woman in Islam have the rights and the duties that suit each. As for religious duties, the woman has to generally perform the same duties which a man must perform. The woman has the full right to earn money and own property just as a man does.

The woman in Islam can follow any profession that suits her nature and role provided that she does not mix with men and that she gets the approval of her husband or guardian. The woman in Islam has a full control over her property. She can also inherit property as a man can although the shares differ owing to differences in financial responsibilities.

The Roles of the Married woman:

After marriage, the woman in Islam does not lose any of her rights. The married woman has her individuality and name. Her name is still her name before marriage. In fact, marriage adds to the duties of the woman because she gets new roles after marriage, i.e., being a wife and a mother.

The question that is ignored by some people is this: if a married woman is a wife, a mother, and a housewife, why should the woman seek jobs outside her house and leave some of these new roles to other woman employed as housekeepers or maids?

After marriage, the woman becomes a wife and being a wife implies additional duties. After marriage, the woman becomes a mother and being a mother implies more and more duties. After marriage, the woman becomes responsible for housekeeping, which means more duties as well. Are all these duties not enough for a woman? Islam puts high emphasis on the roles of the married woman as a wife, a mother, and a housewife.

In Islam, it is held that such roles are worthy for a woman to devote herself to and it is held that such roles are more important than her role as a secretary, a job more badly needed by unemployed men!

One Rank More for the Husband:

In Islam, the home is looked upon as a kingdom run by the husband and the wife. But in each kingdom, as we know, there is always a person with the highest authority who is entitled to have the last say when a problem arises.
This highest authority in the family life is given to the man partly because it is the man in Islam who if financially responsible for the maintenance of the family, the wife, and their children and partly because the man by nature makes a better leader than a woman.

Specialty Distribution:

As we know, physically the man is stronger than the woman. On the other hand, the woman is more affectionate than the man. Therefore, Islam goes with the nature of men and women. Let men, with their stronger physiques, face the troubles of life and the bread-winning role. And let women, with their stronger affections and emotions, face the troubles of bringing up children and managing the house.

The Woman's Unique Roles:

The division of work in Islam between the man and the woman is in line with the man's nature and the woman's nature. Further, this division of speciality between the man and the woman is in the interest of the man, the woman, children, and the family.

In addition, this division is a fair co-operation which enables the husband and the wife to shoulder the responsibilities of the family-life and the home-life. There is a house to be kept; there are children to be brought up. All married men and married women know what it means and what time and effort it takes to keep a house and look after infants and children. It is certainly unfair to a woman to load herself, or to be loaded, with more than what she can shoulder.

It is true that the basic function of the married woman in Islam is to manage the household and bring up children. Nevertheless, this does not contradict the rights of the woman to sell, buy, teach, learn, and defend her country as a man does if she has to.

The Husband's Financial Responsibility:

In Islam, the wife has to be maintained by the husband. She has no financial responsibility whatsoever to the family even if she is rich. The husband must provide for her a lodging, accommodation, and clothes and must cover all family expenses.

The Wife's Duties towards her Husband:

On the other hand, the wife in Islam must keep company with her husband. She must preserve his property from loss or waste. She must not admit to the house anyone whom he does not like. She must not spend from her husband's money without his approval. She must help him in his labor if she can and he must help her in the household duties as much as he can.

The Husband's Duties towards his Wife:

In Islam, the husband is repeatedly ordered to treat his wife kindly. The Prophet Muhammad [peace be upon him {pbuh}], said, "The best of you is the best in the treatment of his wife." He also said, "Women are the trust of Allah in your hands."

No Unnecessary Intermingling of the Two Sexes:

Islam allows women to go out of houses for their needs. But Islam is against unnecessary intermingling of the two sexes because such intermingling, as we may notice in western civilization, leads to endless problems and threatens the safety of the family, which is one of the most valuable institutions in the society according to Islam.

The Women's Decent Clothes:

In Islam, when a woman goes out of her house, she must wear decent clothes. A woman in Islam must wear clothes that cover all her body except the hands and the face. This women's decency in dress has its reasons in Islam.

Firstly, the woman in Islam is a respectable human and her function is not to stimulate the sexual lust of men by uncovering her flesh wherever she goes!

Secondly, indecent clothes of women are an invitation to men or at least a source of unnecessary tension inflicted upon men and we know that nervous tension is one of the basic reasons for many infirmities such as ulcers and heart troubles. Thus, women's decent clothes take part in securing better health to men.

Thirdly, if a man covers all his body, it is more necessary that a woman coves all her body too.

Fourthly, the body of the woman in Islam is not for exhibition on streets and beaches.

Fifthly, the sexual desire is organized in Islam through marriage and through marriage only and, therefore, there is no room for any behavior that goes against this principle.

Sixthly, if the body of the woman is exciting to the man, the only person who is entitled to such excitement is the husband, according to Islam.

In Islam, prevention is better than cure. Therefore, Islam organizes things in a way that prevents problems instead of waiting for problems to happen and then looking for solutions, which might not come!

As a result, Islam disapproves of any unnecessary intermingling of men and women. The Prophet Muhammad {pbuh} said that whenever a man and a woman are alone, the devil will be the third present. In addition, Islam requires the decent dress of women in order to decrease the chances of sinning.

These two principles in Islam are necessary to protect the family and to retain the husband's affection to his wife and the wife's affection to her husband: no unnecessary intermingling of the two sexes and the decent appearance of women.

format_quote Originally Posted by Al_Imaan

can someone plz translate this....its been over 2 months....plz, plz, pretty plz....

yeah...pretty please...its more than 6 months

I like noname's version better.. original post had somethings I disagree with.. for instance prohibiting that she asks for a divorce..well why is divorce legal and what is she is stuck in a miserable marriage?

صفة يحبها الرجل في زوجته

هذه صفات يريدها الرجل بل ويرغبها ويطمح أن تكون في زوجته تعمل بها وتتصف
بها :
just quick translation
1- طاعة الله سبحانه وتعالى في السر والعلن ، وطاعة رسوله صلى الله علية
وسلم ،وأن تكون صالحة .
that she be righteous
2- أن تحفظه في نفسها وماله في حالة غيابه .
to be cautious with herself and his money in his absence
3- أن تسره إذا نظر إليها ، وذلك بجمالها الجسماني والروحي والعقلي ، فكلما
to delight him if he should gaze at her, in her body, her spirituality, her mind
كانت المرأة أنيقة جميلة في مظهرها كلما ازدادت جاذبيتها لزوجها وزاد تعلقه
بها.
the more a woman is elegant the more she is attractive to her husband
4- أن لا تخرج من البيت إلا بإذنه.
to not leave the house without his permission
5- الرجل يحب زوجته مبتسمة دائماً .
A man likes his wife always smiling
6- أن تكون المرأة شاكرة لزوجها ، فهي تشكر الله على نعمة الزواج الذي
أعانها على إحصان نفسها ورزقت بسببه الولد ، وصارت أماً.
To always be grateful, for in that she is grateful to God for the gift of marriage as to not fall into error, the gift of childbirth and the gift of motherhood
7- أن تختار الوقت المناسب والطريقة المناسبة عند طلبها أمر تريده وتخشى أن
يرفضه الزوج بأسلوب حسن وأن تختار الكلمات المناسبة التي لها وقع في النفس.
To choose proper timing, proper words, proper way to approach him when she needs something

8- أن تكون ذات خلق حسن .
to be of great character
9- أن لا تخرج من المنزل متبرجة.
to not leave the house overly done
10- أن لا ترفع صوتها على زوجها إذا جادلته.
to not raise her voice when arguing
11-أن تكون صابرة على فقر زوجها إن كان فقيراً ، شاكرة لغناء زوجها إن كان
غنياءً .
to be patient in his poverty and grateful toward his riches
12- أن تحث الزوج على صلة والدية وأصدقائه وأرحامه.
to be on good terms with his next of kin
13- أن تحب الخير وتسعى جاهدة الى نشره.
to love goodness and to seek it (jihad style)
14- أن تتحلى بالصدق وأن تبتعد عن الكذب.
to be truthful and avoid falsehood
15- أن تربي أبنائها على محبة الله ورسوله صلى الله عليه وسلم ، وأن تربيهم
كذلك على احترام والدهم وطاعته وأن لا تساعدهم على أمر يكرهه الزوج وعلى
الاستمرار في الأخطاء .
to raise her children right, to love religion, to have respect and obedience to the parents
16- أن تبتعد عن الغضب ولانفعال .
to avoid getting angry
17- أن لا تسخر من الآخرين وأن لا تستهزئ بهم .
to not mock others
18- أن تكون متواضعة بعيدة عن الكبر والفخر والخيلاء .
to be modest, avoid pompousness and pride
19- أن تغض بصرها إذا خرجت من المنزل .
to lower her gaze outside the house
20- أن تكون زاهدة في الدنيا مقبلة على الآخرة ترجوا لقاء الله .
to be devout and looking forward to the hereafter
21- أن تكون متوكلة على الله في السر والعلن ، غير ساخطة ولا يائسة.
to make God her champion, not be ungrateful and depressed
22- أن تحافظ على ما فرضه الله عليها من العبادات.
to observe her religious obligations
23- أن تعترف بأن زوجها هو سيدها، قال الله تعالى ( وألفيا سيدها لدى
الباب).
to know that her husband is her 'mister' 'chief' 'head of the house' and goes on to quote suret yousef
24- أن تعلم بأن حق الزوج عليها عظيم ،أعظم من حقها على زوجها .
her duty toward her husband's obligations, greater than his obligation toward her..... hmmmmm
25- أن لا تتردد في الاعتراف بالخطاء، بل تسرع بالاعتراف وتوضح الأسباب دعت
إلى ذلك.
to not be hesistant to admit to folly, and if she made a mistake to admit to it
26- أن تكون ذاكرة لله ، يلهج لسانها دائماً بذكر الله .
to constantly mention God on her tongue
27- أن لا تمانع أن يجامعها زوجها بالطريقة التي يرغب والكيفية التي يريد
ما عدا في الدبر.
to not deny her husband's sexual interests, except that which is forbidden (sodomy)
28- أن تكون مطالبها في حدود طاقة زوجها فلا تثقل عليه وأن ترضى بالقليل .
for his wishes to match her husband's finances
29- أن لا تكون مغرورة بشبابها وجمالها وعلمها وعملها فكل ذلك زائل .
not to be vain with her youth, her beauty, her job, her knowledge as it is all fleeting
30- أن تكون من المتطهرات نظيفة في بدنها وملابسها ومظهرها وأناقتها.
to be of those who like cleanliness, in her body and her clothes and appearance
31- أن تطيعه إذا أمرها بأمر ليس فيه معصية لله ولا لرسوله صلى الله عليه
وسلم .
to acquisce to his wishes so long as it isn't against Allah's law
32- إذا أعطته شئ لا تمنه عليه.
if she gives him a gift not to make him painfully aware of it
33- أن لا تصوم صوم التطوع إلا بإذنه .
to not fast (volunterily) save with his permission
34- أن لا تسمح لأحد بالدخول بمنزله في حالة غيابه إلا بإذنه إذا كان من
غير محارمها ، لان ذلك موطن شبه .
to not invite someone to enter her household in his absence (nonmahrams) because it raises suspicion
35- أن لا تصف غيرها لزوجها ،لان ذلك خطر عظيم على كيان الأسرة.
to not describe another to her husband as to not create a rift
36- أن تتصف بالحياء .
to be modest
37- أن لا تمانع إذا دعاها لفراشه .
to not deny him should he invite her to bed
38- أن لا تسأل زوجها الطلاق ،فإن ذلك محرم عليها .
to not ask for a divorce since it is prohibited--hmmmmm
39- أن تقدم مطالب زوجها وأوامره على غيره حتى على والديّها .
to fulfuill her hubby's duties even before those of her mother'
40- أن لا تضع ثيابها في غير بيت زوجها .
to not put her clothes in another's house save for her husband
41- أن تبتعد عن التشبه بالرجال .
to avoid looking like men
42- أن تذكر زوجها بدعاء الجماع إذا نسئ .
this one is odd hmmmmm
43- أن لا تنشر أسرار الزوجية في الاستمتاع الجنسي ،ولا تصف ذلك لبنات
جنسها.
to not breech the secrets of her sexual life or to describe it to other women
44- أن لا تؤذي زوجها .
to not hurt her husband this one is funny
45- يرغب الرجل في زوجته أن تلاعبه ، قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم
لجابر رضي الله عنه (هلا جارية تلاعبها وتلاعبك )

to play with him
46- إذا فرغا من الجماع يغتسّلا معاً ،لأن ذلك يزيد من أواصر الحب بينهما ،
قالت عائشة رضي الله عنها (( كنت أغتسل أنا ورسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم
من إناء واحد ، تختلف أيدينا فيه ، من الجنابة)).
when they are done consummating to bathe together then it mentions a hadith about it
47- أن لا تنفق من ماله إلا بإذنه .
to not spend of his money save with his permission
48- إذا كرهت خلقاً في زوجها فعليها بالصبر ، فقد تجد فيه خلق آخر أحسن
وأجمل ، قد لا تجده عند غيره إذا طلقها.
if she finds a horrible trait in her husband to be patient with it and try to focus on the good ones
49- أن تحفظ عورتها إلا من زوجها .
to guard her 'womanhood' save for her husband
50- أن تعرف ما يريد ويشتهيه زوجها من الطعام ،وما هي أكلته المفضلة.
to know his favorite foods
51- أن تكون ذات دين قائمة بأمر الله حافظة لحقوق زوجها وفراشه وأولاده
وماله ، معينة له على طاعة الله ، إن نسي ذكرته وإن تثاقل نشطته وإن غضب
أرضته.
to be religious, watcheful over her duties to his bed to his children to his money, obedient to Allah, if he forgets to remind him, if he is lazy she 'unlazies' him and if he is angry to try to coax him
52- أن تشعر الرجل بأنه مهم لديها وإنها في حاجة إلية وإن مكانته عندها
توازي الماء والطعام، فمتى شعر الرجل بأن زوجته محتاجة إليه زاد قرباً منها
، ومتى شعر بأنها تتجاهله وإنها في غنى عنه ، سواء الغنى المالي أو الفكري
،فإن نفسه تملها.
to make him feel he is important to her and that she needs him, a man needs to know he is needed
53- أن تبتعد عن تذكير الزوج بأخطائه وهفواته، بل تسعى دائماً إلى استرجاع
الذكريات الجميلة التي مرت بهما والتي لها وقع حسن في نفسيهما.
to avoid reminding him of his faults and to mention his wonderful traits
54- أن تظهر حبها ومدى احترامها وتقديرها لأهل زوجها، وتشعره بذلك، وتدعوا
لهم أمامه وفي غيابه، وتشعر زوجها كم هي سعيدة بمعرفتها لأهله ، لأن جفائها
لأهله يولد بينها وبين زوجها العديد من المشاكل التي تهدد الحياة الزوجية.
to display her lover for him, her appreciation, how happy she is to be his wife and a part of his family
55- أن تسعى إلى تلمس ما يحبه زوجها من ملبس ومأكل وسلوك ، وأن تحاول
ممارسة ذلك لأن فيه زيادة لحب الزوج لزوجته وتعلقه بها.
to find what her husband desires in clothes and dress and to exercise it often
56- أن تودعه إذا خرج خارج المنزل بالعبارات المحببة إلى نفسه، وتوصله إلى
باب الدار وهذا يبين مدى اهتمامها بزوجها،ومدى تعلقه به.
when he leaves the house to say 'so long samy see you in miami' no I kid but you know what to do at the foyer..
57- إذا عاد من خارج المنزل تستقبله بالترحاب والبشاشة والطاعة وأن تحاول
تخفيف متاعب العمل عنه.

and when returns hom to do the same, and make him unwind
58- أن تظهر حبها لزوجها سواء في سلوكها أو قولها وبأي طريقة مناسبة تراها.
to always display her love in any way she can

59- أن تؤثر زوجها على أقرب الناس إليها، حتى لو كان ذلك والدها.
to tell him he is the closest thing to her even if it be more than her own parents
60- إذا أراد الكلام تسكت ، وتعطيه الفرصة للكلام ، وأن تصغي إليه ، وهذا
يشعر الرجل بأن زوجته مهتمة به .
if he wants to speak to give him a chance
61- أن تبتعد عن تكرار الخطأ ، لأنها إذا كررت الخطأ سوف يقل احترامها عند
زوجها.
to avoid making the same mistakes often
62- أن لا تمدح رجلاً أجنبياً أمام زوجها إلا لصفة دينية في ذلك الرجل ،
لأن ذلك يثير غيرة الرجل ويولد العديد من المشاكل الأسرية ، وقد يصرف نظر
الزوج عن زوجته .
to not praise a foreign man except for a religious trait she admires in that man as to not give birth to disharmony in the marriage
63- أن تحتفظ بسره ولا تفشي به وهذا من باب الأمانة.

to keep his secrets
64- أن لا تنشغل بشيء في حالة وجود زوجها معها ، كأن تقرأ مجلة أو تستمع
الى المذياع ، بل تشعر الزوج بأنها معه قلباً وقالباً وروحاً.
to not be busied with magazines or other things but to make him feel that she is with him in spirit and with her heart always
65- أن تكون قليلة الكلام ،وأن لا تكون ثرثارة ، وقديماً قالوا إذا كان
الكلام من فضة فالسكوت من ذهب .
to not be a chatty cathy.. if words are of silver then silence is golden
66- أن تستغل وقتها بما ينفعها في الدنيا والآخرة ، بحيث تقضي على وقت
الفراغ بما هو نافع ومندوب ، وان تبتعد عن استغلال وقتها بالقيل والقال
والثرثرة والنميمة والغيبة .
to busy her life with what is beneficial here and in the hereafter to not be a backbiter and a slanderer
67- أن لا تتباها بما ليس عندها.
to not boast of traits she doesn't possess
68- أن تكون ملازمة لقراءة القرآن الكريم والكتب العلمية النافعة ، كأن
يكون لها وردٌ يوميٌ.
to often read quran as it is her daily roses
69- أن تجتنب الزينة والطيب إذا خرجت خارج المنزل .
to avoid over beautyfying and excessive perfume when she leaves the house
70- أن تكون داعية إلى الله سبحانه وتعالى والى رسوله صلى الله عليه وسلم
تدعوا زوجها أولاً ثم أسرتها ثم مجتمعها المحيط بها ، من جاراتها وصديقاتها
وأقاربها .
to always call for religiosity at him, in her community and with her kin
71- أن تحترم الزوجة رأي زوجها ، وهذا من باب اللياقة ولاحترام.

to respect her husband's opinion
72- أن تهتم بهندام زوجها ومظهره الخارجي إذا خرج من المنزل لمقابلة
أصدقائه ، لأنهم ينظرون الى ملابسه فإذا رأوها نظيفة ردوا ذلك لزوجته
واعتبروها مصدر نظافته ولاعكس.
to take interest in the way her husband looks in front of his friends, his clothes need to be clean and uptodate so it will reflect well on her
73- أن تعطي زوجها جميع حقوق القوامة التي أوجبها الله سبحانه وتعالى عليها
بنفس راضية وهمة واضحة بدون كسل أو مماطلة وبالمعروف.

to fulfuill all her obligations toward her husband as decreed by God and not be lazy or constantly mentioning favors she has bestowed upon him
74- أن تبتعد عن البدع والسحر والسحرة والمشعوذين لأن ذلك يخرج من الملة
وهو طريق للضياع والهلاك في الدنيا والآخرة .
to avoid withcraft, sorcery and all methods of 'dajjals' since it is a way to ruin a marriage and loss in this life and hereafter
75- أن تقدم كل شي في البيت بيدها وتحت رعايتها ، كالطعام مثلاً ، وأن لا
تجعل الخادمة تطبخ وكذلك التي تقدم الطعام ،لأن اتكال المرأة على الخادمة
يدمر الحياة الزوجية ويقضي عليها ويشتت الأسرة.
to offer everything in the house and not make her servants do it, and not rely so much on servants
76- أن تجتنب الموضة التي تخرج المرأة عن حشمتها وآدابها الإسلامية الحميدة
to avoid fashions that are not in concert with Islamic principles
.
77- أن ترضي زوجها إذا غضب عليها بأسرع وقت ممكن حتى لا تتسع المشاكل
ويتعود عليها الطرفين وتألفها الأسرة .

to make peace with her husband as soon as possible to uphold that family feel
78- أن تجيد التعامل مع زوجها أولا ومع الناس الآخرين ثانياً.
to perfect her treatment of her husband and of other people
79- أن تكون الزوجة قدوة حسنة عند زميلاتها وصديقاتها، يضرب بها المثل في
هندامها وكلامها ورزانتها وأدبها وأخلاقها .
to be a leader, a role model in her words, deeds, clothes, manners etc
80- أن تلتزم بالحجاب الإسلامي الشرعي،وتتجنب لبس البرقع والنقاب وغير ذلك
مما انتشر في الوقت الحاضر.
to avoid a niqab but to wear a hijab
81- أن تكون بسيطة،غير متكلفة، في لبسها ومظهرها وزينتها .
to be simple and not overly done
82- أن لاتسمح للآخرين بالتدخل في حياتها الزوجية، وإذا حدثت مشاكل في
حياتها الزوجية، تسعى إلى حلها بدون تدخل الأهل أو الأقارب أو الأصدقاء.
to not allow others a portal into her love life
83- إذا سافر زوجها لأي سبب من الأسباب ، تدعوا له بالخير والسلامة ،وأن
تحفظه في غيابه، وإذا قام بالاتصال معها عبر الهاتف لاتنكد عليه بما يقلق
باله، كأن تقول له خبراًسيئاً، إنما المطلوب منها أن تسرع إلى طمأنته
ومداعبته وبث السرور على مسامعه، وأن تختار الكلمات الجميلة التي تحثه على
سرعة اللقاء.
if her husband is away on business, to pray for his happiness and safety, to protect him in absentia, if he calls her to not worry him with worrisome events, to find beautiful words to whisper in his ears
84- أن تستشير زوجها في أمورها الخاصة والعامة،وأن تزرع الثقة في زوجها
وذلك باستشارتها له في أمورها التجارية (إذا كانت صاحبة مال خاص بها )، لأن
ذلك يزيد من ثقة واحترام زوجها لها.
to seek her husband's council in private and public affairs if she has her own business and has money of her own, as that displays interest and respect in him as a person
85- أن تراعي شعور زوجها،وأن تبتعد عما يؤذيه من قول أو فعل أو خلق سيئ.
to be mindful of his feelings not to hurt him in words or deeds
86- أن تحبب لزوجها وتظهر صدق مودتها له ،والحياة الزوجية التي بدون كلمات
طيبة جميلة وعبارات دافئة ، تعتبر حياة قد فارقتها السعادة الزوجية.
to love him and genuinly show tenderness..
87- أن تشارك زوجها في التفكير في صلاح الحياة الزوجية وبذل الحلول لعمران
البيت.
to join her husband on improving their life
88- أن لا تتزين بزينة فاتنة تظهر بها محاسن جسمها لغير زوجها من الرجال ،
حتى لوالدها وإخوانها.
to not display her femine guiles and seduction to other than him even not to her father or brothers
89- إذا قدم لها هدية تشكره، وتظهر حبها وفرحها لهذه الهدية، حتى وأن كانت
ليست بالهدية الثمينة أو المناسبة لميولها ورغبتها ، لأن ذلك الفرح يثبت
محبتها لدى الزوج ، وإذا ردت الهدية أو تذمرت منها فإن ذلك يسرع بالفرقة
والحقد والبغض بين الزوجين .
if he offers her a gift to feign interest even if it is something she doesn't like.. if she shows scorn it might make for a miserable marriage
90- أن تكون ذات جمال حسي وهو كمال الخلقة، وذات جمال معنوي وهو كمال الدين
والخلق ، فكلما كانت المرأة أدين وأكمل خلقاً كلما أحب إلى النفس وأسلم
عاقبة.
to be of a spiritual beauty, to be of moral beauty
91- أن تجتهد في معرفة نفسية زوجها ومزاجيته، متى يفرح ، ومتى يحزن ومتى
يغضب ومتى يضحك ومتى يبكي، لأن ذلك يجنبها الكثير والكثير من المشاكل
الزوجية.
to know her husbands psyche, what makes him happy, sad, angry
92- أن تقدم النصح والإرشاد لزوجها ، وأن يأخذ الزوج برأيها، ورسول الله
صلى الله عليه وسلم قدوتنا فقد كان يأخذ برأي زوجاته في مواقف عديدة.
to offer her opinion/council/championing and for her husband to listen to it, as the prophet has done with his wives
93- أن تتودد لزوجها وتحترمه، ولا تتأخر عن شيء يجب أن تتقدم فيه، ولا
تتقدم في شيء يحب أن تتأخر فيه.
to be tender, respectful, to always offer what he loves and stay away from what he hates
94- أن تعرف عيوبها ، وأن تحاول إصلاحها ،وأن تقبل من الزوج إيضاح عيوبها ،
قال عمر بن الخطاب رضي الله عنه ( رحم الله إمراً أهدا إلي عيوبي)، وفي ذلك
صلاح للأسرة.
to know her short comings and try to fix them
95- أن تبادل زوجها الاحترام والتقدير بكل معانيه.
to consentually have respect in all its facets
96- أن تكون شخصيتها متميزة، بعيدة عن تقليد الآخرين ، سواء في لبسها أو
قولها أو سلوكها بوجه عام.
to be a individual unlike others, not into imitating others in dress, words or deeds
97- أن تكون واقعية في كل أمورها.
to be realistic and pragmatic
98- أن تخرج مع زوجها للنزهة في حدود الضابط الشرعية،وأن تحاول إدخال الفرح
والسرور على أسرتها.
to promenade with her husband and instill happiness and joy in the family
99- الكلمة الحلوة هي مفتاح القلب ، والزوج يزيد حباً لزوجته كلما قالت له
كلمة حلوه ذات معنى ومغزى عاطفي ، خاصة عندما يعلم الزوج بأن هذه الكلمة
الجميلة منبعثة بصدق من قلب محب.
a kind word is the key to the heart, a husband loves his wife more, whenever she shares a tender word with emotional virtue, especially if such words truly come from the heart..


the end

Good question.. lists of this nature, sort of depersonalize the human experience.. even if I agree with it in part or in whole, I'd find myself unwilling to acquiesce just by virtue of it being somehow impelled..
I have to sort of step back and focus on a person so that it is a bit palatable..
But I don't see why this list shouldn't apply to men as well?

I doubt anyone would read it, can't believe I took the time to translate it..

As-salaamu 'alaykum

Why does no. 80 says, "avoid niqaab"? Laa hawlaa wa laa quwwata illaa billaah..ffended:

format_quote Originally Posted by Iqram

I'm sure they are 99 good qualities..But in return a husband should have 99 good qualities to make it equal. I don't believe in this sort of 'It's the wife's duty to be as good as possible for thehusband while he lazes around being selfish"....Marriage is a two way thing...As far as I know.

i like what i read...