Motherhood!
I often find myself wondering if what I’m doing is correct. Did I execute my punishment in the correct manner? Did I make myself clear etc.
It has taken a toll on me. Raising kids ranging from 23 to 13 years old. How does any sane person get through a normal day?
Screaming nonstop ‘’don’t do that’’ ‘’leave him alone he doesn’t like it’’ why are you teasing her’’. These daily occurances can be very rewarding, but it can also drain the life out of you.
Often I was asked ‘’how do you manage with five kids?’’ Usually my answer was simply “with patience’’.
Growing up with my kids was insanely awesome. I got to teach young beings the principles of life. The reason they were born etc. I have stumbled along the way, I have erred many times. I often felt guilty when they were much younger when I reprimanded them.
I sit and reminisce about my childhood and all the things I might have done to my parents, what type of child was i to them, did I cause my parents untold stress? The old adage “you will only know what its like to be a parent once you have a kid’’ is that an actual old adage? All I know is that I sometimes feel as if I can pack my bags and just ‘’run away’’ for a few days. Alone on some tropical island away from parenting or lack thereof. Then I find myself thinking ‘’how will you manage alone without them?’’ this is why you became a parent. This is why you were honored with motherhood’’. You can never just switch off from being a parent. It’s not like selling a company and all responsibility falls on someone else. You can’t divorce yourself from your kids. Although I’m sure many of us feel that we want too.
Sitting in a car whilst they were younger became such a challenge, a simple afternoon drive became laborious. ‘’mommy he is touching me’’, ‘’mommy her hair is touching mine’’, ‘’mommy its my turn to sit at the window’’, mommy she is sitting with her legs open, there is no space for me’’. I fixed that, I bought a bigger car and still they found a reason to complain. Challenging? I dare say it did seem to me at the time quite challenging.
My non-existant patience was running out. I was like a constant ‘hitler mom’. Go to your room. Time out. Don’t talk.
Today I sit and I can say with much more confidence and conviction that I have totally started embracing motherhood with all its trials and quirks. Its more a reward, not just a challenge. Its more an honor that I fully embrace, God chose me to be a mother to these people.
Their childhood was a breeze. They embraced me with warmth, they trusted me with an untold trust. They heard me. They would come to me randomly and speak of their love for me. Mother’s day cards was made with a pure love. Drawings of the family was made with pure love. Keeping them safe from harm was easy. Don’t chat to strangers, wasn’t something they questioned. Don’t put your hand on the fire, you will burn wasn’t something that was challenged. And then they grew up!!! They transitioned from little persons to teenage monsters (I use the term monster generously, not as an insult to monsters lol) TEENSTERS!!!! Every minute thing became a challenge.
The Challenges
Cell phones, media, social networks was my nightmare. A new demon. One that I would have a constant battle with. How could I have put my parents through this kind of stress? How? We never had these vices when I was growing up. Our parents worry was, strangers chatting to us. Going to a car and giving directions to someone. They worried about us playing outside in the hot sun, hopscotch, 5 stones, on on, Today we as parents are confronted by virtual strangers, psychos, paedophiles. People that prowl the net for innocent young people and lure them into untold crazy things. Those who promises them love. Telling them their families don’t love them, so they go out in search of ‘love’. This demon has entered my home. When does parents draw a line? How do we propose to protect our loved ones when we welcome demons into our homes?
How do I protect my 20 odd year old from facebook, Instagram, twitter etc. The vile garbage that one is confronted with has become a clear path between good and evil. How do I protect them from whatsapp bbm etc? The quick click of a button produces a quick link to pornographic garbage, naked women, clothed women, yet naked, naked men, both sexes exposing themselves with little or no shame. How does my constant lectures combat this evil. Yes I know some would say there is some good having a cellphone and that the good far outweighs the bad, I would agree, certainly. A quick call to find out where your child is at any given time is a good thing, right? But how do we control what they see, how do we control what they are exposed to, this has become my nightmare, constant war with the devil. How can kids seeing open lewdness be a good thing? How can kids reading about parents managing daughters in the porn industry be a good thing? When society by enlarge has lost all self-respect and morals. Kids are funny beings. They start imitating what they see. No! It doesn’t always depend entirely on their upbringing, no it doesn’t mean that as mothers they will end up imitating us. Peer pressure and the garbage they have been fed has most certainly played a role. Tell me mothers, I would like to see the logic in this. We are faced with a clothed yet naked woman and society will deem her ‘sexy, gorgeous, hot etc’. We would sit and admire her hair, her body, her ass and then we would further go to an extent of imitating her. Cleavage exposed, tight clothing etc. Now I ask, when we see a mother breast-feeding her child in a mall or at any social gathering we gasp in total shock, some of us even commenting ‘how dare she, does she have no shame’. This mother, completely covered, nothing immoral about her act, being a GOD given right to ween her young, we find a problem with? Has our morals become so twisted? Have we completely lost the plot for our young women to walk around exposing themselves. What happened to the morals of only our husbands will lay eyes on our beauty? Why have we sold our souls? Why have we taken to ‘trend’ Are we really sheep? Do we really follow blindly? What kind of mothers are we producing? Have we really become people obsessed with outward beauty? What happened to inward beauty? What happened to character? How can any mother dare say ‘he/she carries their own sin.’ Why do we as parents allow our daughters to expose themselves. Why do we as mothers just become complacent and use the age old adage ‘remember when we were young, we use to do that aswell’ Why cant it be after we have learnt the truth, we now need to teach our future proper morals, so as not to break down society further.
I often find myself wondering if what I’m doing is correct. Did I execute my punishment in the correct manner? Did I make myself clear etc.
It has taken a toll on me. Raising kids ranging from 23 to 13 years old. How does any sane person get through a normal day?
Screaming nonstop ‘’don’t do that’’ ‘’leave him alone he doesn’t like it’’ why are you teasing her’’. These daily occurances can be very rewarding, but it can also drain the life out of you.
Often I was asked ‘’how do you manage with five kids?’’ Usually my answer was simply “with patience’’.
Growing up with my kids was insanely awesome. I got to teach young beings the principles of life. The reason they were born etc. I have stumbled along the way, I have erred many times. I often felt guilty when they were much younger when I reprimanded them.
I sit and reminisce about my childhood and all the things I might have done to my parents, what type of child was i to them, did I cause my parents untold stress? The old adage “you will only know what its like to be a parent once you have a kid’’ is that an actual old adage? All I know is that I sometimes feel as if I can pack my bags and just ‘’run away’’ for a few days. Alone on some tropical island away from parenting or lack thereof. Then I find myself thinking ‘’how will you manage alone without them?’’ this is why you became a parent. This is why you were honored with motherhood’’. You can never just switch off from being a parent. It’s not like selling a company and all responsibility falls on someone else. You can’t divorce yourself from your kids. Although I’m sure many of us feel that we want too.
Sitting in a car whilst they were younger became such a challenge, a simple afternoon drive became laborious. ‘’mommy he is touching me’’, ‘’mommy her hair is touching mine’’, ‘’mommy its my turn to sit at the window’’, mommy she is sitting with her legs open, there is no space for me’’. I fixed that, I bought a bigger car and still they found a reason to complain. Challenging? I dare say it did seem to me at the time quite challenging.
My non-existant patience was running out. I was like a constant ‘hitler mom’. Go to your room. Time out. Don’t talk.
Today I sit and I can say with much more confidence and conviction that I have totally started embracing motherhood with all its trials and quirks. Its more a reward, not just a challenge. Its more an honor that I fully embrace, God chose me to be a mother to these people.
Their childhood was a breeze. They embraced me with warmth, they trusted me with an untold trust. They heard me. They would come to me randomly and speak of their love for me. Mother’s day cards was made with a pure love. Drawings of the family was made with pure love. Keeping them safe from harm was easy. Don’t chat to strangers, wasn’t something they questioned. Don’t put your hand on the fire, you will burn wasn’t something that was challenged. And then they grew up!!! They transitioned from little persons to teenage monsters (I use the term monster generously, not as an insult to monsters lol) TEENSTERS!!!! Every minute thing became a challenge.
The Challenges
Cell phones, media, social networks was my nightmare. A new demon. One that I would have a constant battle with. How could I have put my parents through this kind of stress? How? We never had these vices when I was growing up. Our parents worry was, strangers chatting to us. Going to a car and giving directions to someone. They worried about us playing outside in the hot sun, hopscotch, 5 stones, on on, Today we as parents are confronted by virtual strangers, psychos, paedophiles. People that prowl the net for innocent young people and lure them into untold crazy things. Those who promises them love. Telling them their families don’t love them, so they go out in search of ‘love’. This demon has entered my home. When does parents draw a line? How do we propose to protect our loved ones when we welcome demons into our homes?
How do I protect my 20 odd year old from facebook, Instagram, twitter etc. The vile garbage that one is confronted with has become a clear path between good and evil. How do I protect them from whatsapp bbm etc? The quick click of a button produces a quick link to pornographic garbage, naked women, clothed women, yet naked, naked men, both sexes exposing themselves with little or no shame. How does my constant lectures combat this evil. Yes I know some would say there is some good having a cellphone and that the good far outweighs the bad, I would agree, certainly. A quick call to find out where your child is at any given time is a good thing, right? But how do we control what they see, how do we control what they are exposed to, this has become my nightmare, constant war with the devil. How can kids seeing open lewdness be a good thing? How can kids reading about parents managing daughters in the porn industry be a good thing? When society by enlarge has lost all self-respect and morals. Kids are funny beings. They start imitating what they see. No! It doesn’t always depend entirely on their upbringing, no it doesn’t mean that as mothers they will end up imitating us. Peer pressure and the garbage they have been fed has most certainly played a role. Tell me mothers, I would like to see the logic in this. We are faced with a clothed yet naked woman and society will deem her ‘sexy, gorgeous, hot etc’. We would sit and admire her hair, her body, her ass and then we would further go to an extent of imitating her. Cleavage exposed, tight clothing etc. Now I ask, when we see a mother breast-feeding her child in a mall or at any social gathering we gasp in total shock, some of us even commenting ‘how dare she, does she have no shame’. This mother, completely covered, nothing immoral about her act, being a GOD given right to ween her young, we find a problem with? Has our morals become so twisted? Have we completely lost the plot for our young women to walk around exposing themselves. What happened to the morals of only our husbands will lay eyes on our beauty? Why have we sold our souls? Why have we taken to ‘trend’ Are we really sheep? Do we really follow blindly? What kind of mothers are we producing? Have we really become people obsessed with outward beauty? What happened to inward beauty? What happened to character? How can any mother dare say ‘he/she carries their own sin.’ Why do we as parents allow our daughters to expose themselves. Why do we as mothers just become complacent and use the age old adage ‘remember when we were young, we use to do that aswell’ Why cant it be after we have learnt the truth, we now need to teach our future proper morals, so as not to break down society further.
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