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Concerned about place of loved one after death

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    WarriorforMarie's Avatar Full Member
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    Question Concerned about place of loved one after death

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    The one woman I love was an atheist. I could not bear to exist somewhere pleasant if she is in a place of suffering. If I understand correctly from these posts, I would either not remember her or not care if I was in the place where Muslims go when they die.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-16-2013 at 12:07 PM. Reason: edited out last two sentences which some found offensive
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by WarriorforMarie View Post
    The one woman I love was an atheist. I could not bear to exist somewhere pleasant if she is in a place of suffering. If I understand correctly from these posts, I would either not remember her or not care if I was in the place where Muslims go when they die.


    Thanks for replying. :smile:

    May Allah guide us all.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 04:59 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by Plz Answer Me View Post
    Thanks for replying.

    May Allah guide us all.
    You have really read what he stated???

    format_quote Originally Posted by WarriorforMarie View Post
    I will add Islam to the list of religions I will not embrace.
    Peace be with you WarriorForMarie

    I didn't taken any offense with what you said but like any follower of a religion,Muslims believe that they are rightly guided(we are not debating here who is right and who is wrong,so lets not take it that way Insha Allah). One of the core concept in Islam is believe in unseen and Its started when you start worshiping Allah only.This enhances our vision beyond the material sheet we found around ourselves so is our perspective of lifespan.Since you never joined claiming you wants to embrace Islam or researching Islam but only for a woman you loved(as a protector of weak)so I respect your opinion.But as a brother of humanity,I would like you to look in to various other teachings of Islam,maybe if you want this one intriguing,you will like another
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:00 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    Salaam / Peace Be Upon You.

    format_quote Originally Posted by WarriorforMarie View Post
    The one woman I love was an atheist. I could not bear to exist somewhere pleasant if she is in a place of suffering.
    Athiests don't believe in the afterlife am I correct? So this world is probably the pleasant place for you then? If that's the case, would you commit suicide if she died? Please don't We're all here for you Inshallah. Seek help if you please, and suicide is a sin in most religions. Inshallah you will overcome this burden in the future.


    format_quote Originally Posted by WarriorforMarie View Post
    If I understand correctly from these posts, I would either not remember her or not care if I was in the place where Muslims go when they die. That is too horrific to contemplate. This has made up my mind, I will add Islam to the list of religions I will not embrace.
    You can't escape


    format_quote Originally Posted by Plz Answer Me View Post
    Thanks for replying.

    May Allah guide us all.
    Ameen.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:00 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    Over five years ago the woman who was the love of my life. In the time immediately after her death there were two separate thoughts that were always on my mind. One was the depressing the thought that she had simply ceased to exist and that I would never be able to see her again. The other, partially conflicting thought was a worry that if there was an afterlife that she was in hell because she was an atheist. For a long time I struggled with these two thoughts, alternatively wanting one to be false and then the other and concerned about the implications of one of them being false because it made the other true.

    For some time I searched for an answer about what awaits us after death. So far no representative of any religion has been able to provide an answer. In one way it was immensely disappointing because my despair about never being able to see her again was only reinforced. On the other hand, it is a relief. The inability of any religion to provide evidence is comforting.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:01 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by Signor View Post
    Peace be with you WarriorForMarie

    I didn't taken any offense with what you said but like any follower of a religion,Muslims believe that they are rightly guided(we are not debating here who is right and who is wrong,so lets not take it that way Insha Allah). One of the core concept in Islam is believe in unseen and Its started when you start worshiping Allah only.This enhances our vision beyond the material sheet we found around ourselves so is our perspective of lifespan.Since you never joined claiming you wants to embrace Islam or researching Islam but only for a woman you loved(as a protector of weak)so I respect your opinion.But as a brother of humanity,I would like you to look in to various other teachings of Islam,maybe if you want this one intriguing,you will like another

    Signor,

    Thank you for your thoughtful comments. I appreciate your position. I certainly have nothing against Muslims and their relationship with the deity they worship is their own. I also understand you mentioned the idea of looking into different teachings of Islam that might suggest something different.

    However, the situation I face is that I do not want to risk ending up in a place different from where she went to. Maybe there are interpretations of Islam that would permit her to enter paradise. But what if they are mistaken and she is not but I became a Muslim anyway and ended up in paradise while she was someplace else? I can not take that chance.

    Have a good day.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:03 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by Iceee View Post
    Salaam / Peace Be Upon You.


    Athiests don't believe in the afterlife am I correct? So this world is probably the pleasant place for you then? If that's the case, would you commit suicide if she died? Please don't We're all here for you Inshallah. Seek help if you please, and suicide is a sin in most religions. Inshallah you will overcome this burden in the future.



    You can't escape




    Ameen.

    Hello Iceee,

    Thank you for your kind comments. Do not worry. In the first year after she died I was very sad but I never seriously contemplated suicide. First, I didn't want to make the people who cared about me become sad. Second, I decided I would use the time I have left in the world to help others until I die myself.

    Have a good day.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:04 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by Hulk View Post
    Remember that the kafir is one who rejects Islam. So you must ask yourself whether your family members are actually knowledgable about Islam, I'm quite certain that the answer is no. Knowledge is when meaning arrives into the soul, I'm sure you've experienced it when you were learning about Islam. A lot of people's understanding of Islam nowadays is simply what the media feeds them, that is what they reject.
    Nice approach! It is important to separate between whether they deny Islam as it is or the false Islam they know from the media.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:04 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by WarriorforMarie View Post
    The one woman I love was an atheist. I could not bear to exist somewhere pleasant if she is in a place of suffering. If I understand correctly from these posts, I would either not remember her or not care if I was in the place where Muslims go when they die. That is too horrific to contemplate. This has made up my mind, I will add Islam to the list of religions I will not embrace.
    You would find that muslims are not the type of people who would willy-nilly say "so-and-so is definitely going to hell". Even if we might believe that someone might be an atheist all their life, it is still not in our place to say "that person's going to hell". We do not take such statements lightly and we also recognise that God knows best, not us.

    It could be that an atheist dies not having heard of Islam all his/her life and the atheist's only understanding of religion is that which is of the Christian perspective which may be why he abandoned belief in a Creator. It could be that an atheist embraces Islam at the very last breath before they die, we don't know.

    You are alive right now, and you are saying that you've decided that you will never embrace Islam based on a few posts you've just read without even bothering to learn more or clarifying anything. Is the truth not more important then any worldly/emotional attachments?

    The fate of a non-muslim who is no longer alive rests with God, you are currently in a situation where you can learn to see if Islam is the truth. Don't dismiss it so easily, you might regret it. It might be that she is pardoned for not being introduced to Islam and granted Paradise and you on the other hand intentionally rejected Islam because of your lack of understanding.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:05 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
    Concerned about place of loved one after death

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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    First of all there is no need to talk as if Muslims have never had any suffering, had family/friends suffer from illnesses, had deaths, members of their family even rejecting Allah.

    Allah created everyone, you would never have the inclining to imagine the person you loved unless Allah had already created them-you liked what God had created.

    Everyone belongs to Allah! Not to you, even children are entrusted by Allah to parents. What atheists do is use up an excuse of not to be bothered about anything by saying Allah doesn't exist, its like saying I've made a mess in the garden-but just brush it off, as you want to continue to enjoy the life of this world.

    Anyone who dies as an atheists go to Hell, they send themselves to Hell, it does not diminish God's Mercy as they send themselves there by their rejection, neither does it effect the Muslims, angels devotion to Allah.

    On the Day Of Judgement all will be looking towards Allah, no one will care of each other, not a Mother for her child, as its about your personal relationship with God and not to anyone else (which of course people hold little value to). The person that you loved did not create you, God did, by saying that individual means more then all that God gave you including other people is completely wrong. We are very clear in Islam, a person that does not repent, goes to Hell, when they die they do not care, or think of you, only that they that should have accepted God as the angels have done.

    Even people belittle everything their parents gave them to say they are going to toss it all away because of someone else, and they do such an enormity with God, when they say they don't accept him because of someone else- who did not give you life, who cannot help you, who does not give you food.

    See you on the Day of Judgement with whatever path you choose.
    Concerned about place of loved one after death

    "Allah! There is no god but He - the Living, The Self-subsisting, Eternal. No slumber can seize Him Nor Sleep. His are all things In the heavens and on earth." Quran , Surah Baqarah 2:255
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    However, the situation I face is that I do not want to risk ending up in a place different from where she went to. Maybe there are interpretations of Islam that would permit her to enter paradise. But what if they are mistaken and she is not but I became a Muslim anyway and ended up in paradise while she was someplace else? I can not take that chance.
    Hell is an atrocious place. You only say now that you would want to be with her but if you knew how horrible it was after tasting a minute of it you would never in a million years wish to willingly go there. This is why on the day of judgement, it is mentioned that mothers will refuse to recognise their own offspring due to the concern they have for their own selves. On that day, it is every man for himself. Literally. Everyone who has ever died will be resurrected and made to answer for their creed and deeds.

    At this moment, in this life, our spiritual eyes are tightly shut. We see things differently. On that day, our understanding of the true reality would be corrected. What we yearn for so much in this world will be insignificant, including our loved ones, as we await our fate.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:05 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    I am sorry about your loss, WarriorforMarie. I pray and trust that Marie is in a good place.

    I am married to an atheist too and I know him to be a wonderful and caring and generous and supportive man, but simply one who cannot find it in him to believe in God.
    Like you and many others I struggle with the concept of hell and non-believers.

    But I am Christian, so it probably wouldn't be helpful for me to give you my own perspective - certainly not in the Clarifications about Islam section.

    I hope that your pain of loss eases, but that your memories of Marie remain. And that you will find peace.
    Last edited by glo; 08-16-2013 at 09:18 AM. Reason: typos ...
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    May God help me.
    Amen.

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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by WarriorforMarie View Post
    The one woman I love was an atheist. I could not bear to exist somewhere pleasant if she is in a place of suffering. If I understand correctly from these posts, I would either not remember her or not care if I was in the place where Muslims go when they die. That is too horrific to contemplate. This has made up my mind, I will add Islam to the list of religions I will not embrace.
    One heck of a love you have, prepared to go to hell just for her. Lets hope that love will remain when you actually see hell, I'd rather not remember her than go to hell.
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by Hulk View Post


    You would find that muslims are not the type of people who would willy-nilly say "so-and-so is definitely going to hell". Even if we might believe that someone might be an atheist all their life, it is still not in our place to say "that person's going to hell". We do not take such statements lightly and we also recognise that God knows best, not us.

    It could be that an atheist dies not having heard of Islam all his/her life and the atheist's only understanding of religion is that which is of the Christian perspective which may be why he abandoned belief in a Creator. It could be that an atheist embraces Islam at the very last breath before they die, we don't know.

    You are alive right now, and you are saying that you've decided that you will never embrace Islam based on a few posts you've just read without even bothering to learn more or clarifying anything. Is the truth not more important then any worldly/emotional attachments?

    The fate of a non-muslim who is no longer alive rests with God, you are currently in a situation where you can learn to see if Islam is the truth. Don't dismiss it so easily, you might regret it. It might be that she is pardoned for not being introduced to Islam and granted Paradise and you on the other hand intentionally rejected Islam because of your lack of understanding.

    Hulk(!!!!)

    You are right about the comments comment. What I should have said was if the comments were representative of the reality.

    Thank you for your thoughtful comments. You make a good point about what if she were permitted into paradise because of not being exposed to Islam. This is an interesting idea. How much exposure to Islam would one need to have in order to be considered to have been exposed to it?
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:06 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by Paprika View Post
    One heck of a love you have, prepared to go to hell just for her. Lets hope that love will remain when you actually see hell, I'd rather not remember her than go to hell.
    Believe me Paprika, I am not looking forward to such a prospect. But I can not leave her alone there.
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by glo View Post
    I am sorry about you loss, WarriorforMarie. I pray and trust that Marie is in a good place.

    I am married to an atheist too and I know him to be a wonderful and caring and generous and supportive man, but simply one who cannot find it in him to believe in God.
    Like you and many others I struggle with the concept of hell and non-believers.

    But I am Christian, so it probably wouldn't be helpful for me to give you my own perspective - certainly not in the Clarifications about Islam section.

    I hope that your pain of loss eases, but that you memories of Marie remain. And that you will find peace.
    Hello Glo,

    Thank you for your kind comments! It is a pleasure to meet you.

    I hope that everything works out well for you and your spouse, both in this life and in the future.
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by h-n View Post
    First of all there is no need to talk as if Muslims have never had any suffering, had family/friends suffer from illnesses, had deaths, members of their family even rejecting Allah.

    Allah created everyone, you would never have the inclining to imagine the person you loved unless Allah had already created them-you liked what God had created.

    Everyone belongs to Allah! Not to you, even children are entrusted by Allah to parents. What atheists do is use up an excuse of not to be bothered about anything by saying Allah doesn't exist, its like saying I've made a mess in the garden-but just brush it off, as you want to continue to enjoy the life of this world.

    Anyone who dies as an atheists go to Hell, they send themselves to Hell, it does not diminish God's Mercy as they send themselves there by their rejection, neither does it effect the Muslims, angels devotion to Allah.

    On the Day Of Judgement all will be looking towards Allah, no one will care of each other, not a Mother for her child, as its about your personal relationship with God and not to anyone else (which of course people hold little value to). The person that you loved did not create you, God did, by saying that individual means more then all that God gave you including other people is completely wrong. We are very clear in Islam, a person that does not repent, goes to Hell, when they die they do not care, or think of you, only that they that should have accepted God as the angels have done.

    Even people belittle everything their parents gave them to say they are going to toss it all away because of someone else, and they do such an enormity with God, when they say they don't accept him because of someone else- who did not give you life, who cannot help you, who does not give you food.

    See you on the Day of Judgement with whatever path you choose.
    Yes, I guess I will say you on the Day of Judgement. Hopefully you have chosen the right religion and the right version of that religion.
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by WarriorforMarie View Post
    Yes, I guess I will say you on the Day of Judgement. Hopefully you have chosen the right religion and the right version of that religion.
    I believe that on the Day of Judgement we will all be in the same boat - meeting our creator and having to give account for our lives.
    I also believe that God understands our troubles and struggles and that he is merciful and forgiving. So there is hope for us all!

    One thing I like about Islam, is that it doesn't give any guarantees. We are all dependent on God's mercy, even if we are following 'the right religion'.
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    Peace
    glocandle ani 1 - Concerned about place of loved one after death

    Here I stand.
    I can do no other.
    May God help me.
    Amen.

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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude View Post
    Hell is an atrocious place. You only say now that you would want to be with her but if you knew how horrible it was after tasting a minute of it you would never in a million years wish to willingly go there. This is why on the day of judgement, it is mentioned that mothers will refuse to recognise their own offspring due to the concern they have for their own selves. On that day, it is every man for himself. Literally. Everyone who has ever died will be resurrected and made to answer for their creed and deeds.

    At this moment, in this life, our spiritual eyes are tightly shut. We see things differently. On that day, our understanding of the true reality would be corrected. What we yearn for so much in this world will be insignificant, including our loved ones, as we await our fate.
    You are right Alpha Dude. Hell is a truly terrible place. I can't leave her in that place alone. Of course, even if I didn't want to I am likely to end up there regardless of what I do. No matter which religion I choose I am likely to be choosing the wrong one, just from a statistical perspective. Even if I sought to avoid hell I could end up there.
    Last edited by Insaanah; 08-17-2013 at 05:07 PM. Reason: changed post title to that of thread
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    sister herb's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Concerned about place of loved one after death

    Actually, no living soul right now can´t to be sure, if your Marie will enter to hell or not... Only Allah knows, as we say.
    | Likes glo, WarriorforMarie liked this post
    Concerned about place of loved one after death

    From Occupied Palestine:

    We have suffered too much for too long. We will not accept apartheid masked as peace. We will settle for no less than our freedom.



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