HELP me in this introduction please

peace be upon u all
how r u ?
in the last week i asked u to check my essay (media effects) and u helped me well ,,,thank u so much .(dont leave me alone pleeaasse)....but today ,,i post the same essay but with a different introduction ,,,so ,can u check it for me pleaase ,(because i share in a competetion) and my teacher asked me to change the intro ,,,,here it is
thank u all

media effects

It is great to contemplate nature ,where you see the green rug and listen to chirp of birds as a delightful symphony ,you feel it is the symbol of beauty and perfection ,but suddenly, you will be surprised that a bee stings you ,it hurts you ,at the same time you will change your mind and remember another similar virtual nature which swap songs with chirp of birds and the "Hotmail" with carrier pigeon , this nature is called the media.

Good and evil are both in media, the good is evident and the evil is called many different names, so, I would like to write about some of contemporary issues: the media effects on morality and violence.
It is certain that most of us always compare between children nowadays and children in the past .Children nowadays are more aggressive and violent, they have aggressive thoughts, speak more violently and use their energy in attacking and injuring others as an entertainment, since an American study indicated that exposure to media violence stimulates aggressive behavior and affects them as adults years later .Don't forget the computer games which are mostly based on killing people to get more money ! These games and scenarios cause a terrible danger for children who regard the games characters as heroes; accordingly, children try to imitate their heroes!
Moreover, watching TV affects brain growth and decreases ability to create, because it kills imagination, this in turn affects children's studying and thus their production when they grow up and it is an evidence of the far -reaching effects.
Ok .After I have written about violence, I want to write about another important issue that is really grievous, it is media effects on our morals. It is bitter ,but reality, to recognize how our values and morals have been changed gradually without doing anything to regain them, we have become feeling guiltless and irresponsible .
What we watch today of changeable Arabic culture is something occurs everyday ,every hour and every minute by the way in which we use the media means –or rather the way in which they use us-! In fact, the media means are the main influent on people's morality, perceptions and behaviors. First when we turn on TV we will see a perverse song, or a silly series or a pointless program, you rarely find a useful channels. Have you ever counted the video clip channels? They are 73! Well, these pestilential channels cost annually 67 million dollars; just to change our values upside down, make us forget our Arabic identity, deprive us of our responsibility and to dominate our concerns, clues, and the pattern of our lives. All of these changes occur in the name of globalization and openness, and we accept!
Although there are some objectors against this immoral phenomenon who always delete these channels , they are a minority in a sea of supporters .The problem is that the majority of people throw a way their religion ,values and language by watching valueless channels, but what is more that they don’t feel they are at fault and always blame others !
At last, I am not anti- media but I protest the glut of garbage which is shown in TV. Dear sisters and brothers, , I am going to leave you now but my words wont ,we are all responsible , we have to defend our religion, values and culture as much as we can ,by very simple ways, that are ,to delete any valueless channels and to keep our children under control in order to get back the Arabic cultures features.



Written by :
Haya Ziad al- amleh
Tenth grade

thank u again...i apreciate ur concerns