Probably a lame thread title but by that I mean intercultural marriages...
What do you think...Do you think the intolerance we see today....(When it comes to parents) will disappear over time?
Do you think that when it comes to us being parents, them prejudices will have vanished or do you think there is wisdom in sticking to your own culture/background etc and never experiencing the richness of another
Why do you think these prejudices exist...There is no nationalism or tribalism or racism in Islam...so why?? :enough!:
Have you personally married out of the culture and if yes did you face any difficulties/hardships/barriers?
What do you think...Do you think the intolerance we see today....(When it comes to parents) will disappear over time?
i think it will, if we compare now to say 10 years ago we'll notice a massive change...sure there are people who are still the same but i think this problem is gradually starting to disapear
Why do you think these prejudices exist...There is no nationalism or tribalism or racism in Islam...so why??
different people have different reasons but either way it shouldn't be there
Have you personally married out of the culture and if yes did you face any difficulties/hardships/barriers?
my parents arent against it in anyway, thats probably why they dnt appose my marriage to an American convert, i don't see why there would be any hardships or barriers though
sure we'd hav dif customs and cultures but we hav the same religion right? and it won't hurt anyone to learn more bout the others culture
Wassalamu Alaykum
WassalamuAlaykum
Learn silence as you have learned speech.
Speech will guide you, and silence will protect you.
I think we will move away from this restricting mindset one day insha'Allah. But as they say, be the changes you wanna see in the world
lol... but i think the one of the reasons why parents are "anti cultural" when it comes to marriage is maybe they dont trust other cultures. maaaybe ...i mean that in the sense that they grew up around people of only their own culture..i mean like they didn't travel much (well at least not that i think so) so they didnt really see other people expect their own town/village, etc...so maybe they dont trust people of other nationalities simply becsue they dont really know who they are properly...
or maybe i just over think
...desperate for husnul-khitaam...
please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.
What do you think...Do you think the intolerance we see today....(When it comes to parents) will disappear over time?
Do you think that when it comes to us being parents, them prejudices will have vanished or do you think there is wisdom in sticking to your own culture/background etc and never experiencing the richness of another
Why do you think these prejudices exist...There is no nationalism or tribalism or racism in Islam...so why?? :enough!:
Have you personally married out of the culture and if yes did you face any difficulties/hardships/barriers?
Will it disappear over time? I don't think it will ever fully disappear, there will always be some tension, but I do believe it will lessen, especially for those living outside of their original countries. I think it will be just like the US, how before, it was insane for a black/white couple to be even thought of, and it met a lot of resistance at first, but gradually, things got better. Even now there are still people who think each should stick to their own, but alhamdullilah they're somewhat less than they were before.
I personally believe that as long as the two people get along with each other and know how to communicate, culture won't be a barrier. I don't deny that sometimes it's easier to simply marry someone who has the same background as you, and if you find someone like that who has the characteristics you want in a spouse, then great. But if it has to be a choice between marrying someone with the same cultural background as you, or the kind of person you want to be with, then the latter wins, always.
Why do these prejudices exist, while in islam they don't? That's the pretty simple answer of "because for a LOT of people nowadays, culture and the practice of their forefathers >>>>>> islam".
And no, I haven't married out of my culture, but I'd love to, if the opportunity ever arises and it works out.
format_quote Originally Posted by islamirama
But i think even then these arabs and desi will die over a white person (even black these days) before they marry among each other.
I don't think that's necessarily true. I personally know of a few couples in which one person is Arab and the other is either Pakistani, or Indian.
In my extended family there's a Syrian man who is married to a lovely Indian woman, and they've got 3 kids and get along beautifully mashallah. They've intertwined their cultures, and it works for them.
I don't think that's necessarily true. I personally know of a few couples in which one person is Arab and the other is either Pakistani, or Indian.
In my extended family there's a Syrian man who is married to a lovely Indian woman, and they've got 3 kids and get along beautifully mashallah. They've intertwined their cultures, and it works for them.
You know a few people, vast majority want to stick to their own kind. Many arabs despise paki/indians and i don't blame them for it. Many uneducated low class paki/indians go to arab world and do menial jobs and thus giving all desi bad name. Many desi despise arabs because they are squanderer of money and think they are better than others. And lastly, both sides are proud of their culture don't want you to marry "them" and abandon your kind.
whats up akhee? anything bugging you? let us know.
mixed marriages...............say for e.g, someone of a different race proposed to you........and the parents ofcourse have a heart attack from the idea,....what should you do, if this were to happen?
My heart, so precious,
I won't trade for a hundred thousand souls.
Your one smile takes it for free.Rumi
whats up akhee? anything bugging you? let us know.
mixed marriages...............say for e.g, someone of a different race proposed to you........and the parents ofcourse have a heart attack from the idea,....what should you do, if this were to happen?
Explain to them why you'd like to consider the proposal and that there's nothing wrong with it at all and that there aint no place for racism in Islam
No there's no place for it in Islam. But I can understand how parents can be shocked momentarily. For those who are not married... do your parents expect you to marry some one of the same race as you?
‘Say: If the ocean were ink wherewith to write out the words of my Lord, sooner would the ocean be exhausted, even if We added another ocean like it.’~Al Qu'raan (18:109)
Explain to them why you'd like to consider the proposal and that there's nothing wrong with it at all and that there aint no place for racism in Islam
lol like that will fly with them
I know many whose family says: Only our race, culture, nation, village, tribe, cast, and even only cousins!
And if a parent brings a proposal that you dislike or won't let them pick someone out for you that they want you to marry and you say no, they'll say: Is this what i raised you for? you have no respect for your parents, what does islam teach you? i see i'm not wanted now that your grown up, fine go live your life and do what you want, i'll go back home and live rest of my lif there!
Last edited by islamirama; 12-03-2008 at 05:49 PM.
yes they do ^ .....this is all hypothetical people
anyway,...im not getting married to a mangy, ill fight it with every last breath in my body.We have rights in Islam! and it is one of our fundemental rights to choose the people we will love and live with for life....buts its tough...the parents just dont get it...
My heart, so precious,
I won't trade for a hundred thousand souls.
Your one smile takes it for free.Rumi
I know many whose family says: Only our race, culture, nation, village, tribe, cast, and even only cousins!
lol, exactly. It's not the easiest thing to explain to them. Especially in the asian (indo-pak) communities.
‘Say: If the ocean were ink wherewith to write out the words of my Lord, sooner would the ocean be exhausted, even if We added another ocean like it.’~Al Qu'raan (18:109)
yes they do ^ .....this is all hypothetical people
anyway,...im not getting married to a mangy, ill fight it with every last breath in my body.We have rights in Islam! and it is one of our fundemental rights to choose the people we will love and live with for life....buts its tough...the parents just dont get it...
mangoes or whatever they are?? need love too and they are human beings
you fight it out? you are a "baatmeez girl" who has no haya, blah blah....
read my 2nd part on my last post
I'll explain to Abu that this person, although not Baki could just be the best thing for me insha'Allah. And which father doesnt want his daughter to be happy?
Yeh I've read it, and yeh you're right. No harm in trying though huh ;p
yeh, well they can go find love somewhere in the mangoe tree, cuz they aint getn none from me!
format_quote Originally Posted by J.U.N.I.O.R
Thats harsh! i guess ur not into guys infested with amla oil
To be honest...I have an opinion too sis Sahabiyaat (obviously ) and its somewhat like urs but, thats not to say you couldnt be happy in such a marriage.
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when it comes to marriage is maybe they dont trust other cultures. maaaybe ...i mean that in the sense that they grew up around people of only their own culture..i mean like they didn't travel much (well at least not that i think so) so they didnt really see other people expect their own town/village, etc...so maybe they dont trust people of other nationalities simply becsue they dont really know who they are properly...
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