Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to marry her knowing that she quite happily works as a teacher?
Answered by Sheikh `Abd Allah b. Bayyah, professor at `Abd al-`Azîz University in Jeddah
The general rule in marriage is that the husband is the one who has the duty of providing for and maintaining his wife. However, there is a condition for the husband having the authority associated with this that he is indeed providing for her properly and taking care of her needs. This is why the jurists Mâlik and al-Shâfi`î were of the opinion that when the husband fails to fulfill these conditions, his status as protector and maintainer is compromised and consequently the woman has a right to seek divorce.
Abû Hanîfah, on the other hand, was of the opinion that the expenditure becomes a debt that he owes to his wife.
If a husband prevents his wife from working, he could only conceivably do so if he is able to sufficiently fulfill her needs. Nevertheless, there is more to it than just that. The issue really must take custom into consideration as well as the specific circumstances of the individuals involved.
In some regions of the world, if a woman were prevented from working, it could lead to serious disturbances at home. It could be that her staying at home is what would instigate those problems. This could lead to a whole host of undesirable consequences. For this reason, the issue must be considered in light of weighing the pros and cons.
Women from among the Companions used to engage in work. Asmâ’ bint Abî Bakr – the wife of al-Zubayr – used to work. She used to feed al-Zubayr’s livestock. [Sahîh al-Bukhârî (5224) and Sahîh Muslim (2182)]
Then we have the woman who was told by some people to cease working on her date palms on account of her being in her period of mourning from her husband’s death, so the Prophet (peace be upon him) said to her: “Go to your date palms” He said: “prune your date palms.” [Musannaf `Abd al-Razzâq (7/25) with an authentic line of transmission]
From this we can see that women engaged in work is not something new that has just developed in recent times. It is something well known in Islam. For this reason, people have to be flexible about this issue. Indeed, it is true that the husband is responsible for the maintenance of his wife. He is the head of the household.
Islamic Law likes to have all matters clearly defined. The Prophet said: “Three people should not go fourth without appointing one of them to be their leader.” [Sunan al-Bayhaqî (9/359) and Musannaf `Abd al-Razzâq (4/58)] This means that there should be some delineation of responsibility.
The family has a leader appointed for it, and this leader is the husband. This does not mean, however, that he can just do as he pleases, say what he pleases, and bark orders left and right. Quite the contrary, the husband and wife have to manage the household by way of mutual consultation. Allah commands them to engage in consultation in matters of weaning: “If they both decide on weaning, by mutual consent, and after due consultation, there is no blame on them.” [Sûrah al-Baqarah: 233]
This is a matter that most acutely affects them both. How then should it be for a matter that has its greatest effect upon the woman?
In brief, if the husband commands his wife to do something that is not contrary to Islamic Law, then she should obey him. However, it is not permissible for him to order her to do something that will be detrimental to her or cause her to lose out on something good. If, on the other hand, her work causes problems like excessive mixing with men or has other negative consequences, then he is within his rights to tell her not to wok and she should comply with what he says. This is in accordance with the view of the majority of scholars.
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
if a woman works then she is indirectly saying to the husband 'im independant of u'!
a man needs to feel as if he is 'needed' in the relationship and needs to feel as if she is counting on him and dependant upon him... this motivates the man to work harder and earn for her.
a woman working could have serious damaging effects on a relationship
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
It's funny how women cry for equal rights yet when it comes to something like this they're more than happy to accept this. Women should be out there working just as men do. Women are more than capable of bringing cash into the house to feed the family and should do just that rather than sitting at home cleaning a few plates and then whining to their husbands when they arrive home that they've got it hard...!
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
^women (at least in islam) have equal rights i guess its just in different ways. In Islam it is assigned to the husband to provide for his wife not vise versa. we didn't say women arent capable of bringing the bread home (we know they are), but she shouldn't be made to do something that isnt her job to begin with.
its the mans job to provide, and (to me) he is a coward if he expects his wife to do do his job and expects/asks her for her wealth. its wrong to take a woman's wealth imo...really wrong.
no offense if thats the way you people do things
It's funny how women cry for equal rights yet when it comes to something like this they're more than happy to accept this.
i dont see why they shouldn't. crying for equal rights usually means means trying to out smart and out-do men anyway so i think by making him work she already has. i think its flawed to think that this is a channel where men women are equal.
besides what happens to their kids? who looks after them?
A muslim woman shouldn't be crying for equal rights, she's already got it
Last edited by Ummu Sufyaan; 12-30-2009 at 01:42 AM.
...desperate for husnul-khitaam...
please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
format_quote Originally Posted by Umm ul-Shaheed
^women (at least in islam) have equal rights i guess its just in different ways. In Islam it is assigned to the husband to provide for his wife not vise versa. we didn't say women arent capable of bringing the bread home (we know they are), but she shouldn't be made to do something that isnt her job to begin with.
its the mans job to provide, and (to me) he is a coward if he expects his wife to do do his job and expects/asks her for her wealth. its wrong to take a woman's wealth imo...really wrong.
no offense if thats the way you people do things
i dont see why they shouldn't. crying for equal rights usually means means trying to out smart and out-do men anyway so i think by making him work she already has. i think its flawed to think that this is a channel where men women are equal.
besides what happens to their kids? who looks after them?
A muslim woman shouldn't be crying for equal rights, she's already got it
Woah woah woah! That isn't what I was saying nor is it what we do. Here, the man AND the woman go to work and come home with the money, put it together to feed the family, provide for each other and to be able to take their children abroad to experience different countries and cultures, to pay for better education for their children...
After work and after a shower, everyone mucks in to tidy the house up, including the children. That is how we do it and in my opinion that's how it should be.
As for the kids, they should be at school or nursery...
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
format_quote Originally Posted by Blackpool
Woah woah woah! That isn't what I was saying nor is it what we do. Here, the man AND the woman go to work and come home with the money, put it together to feed the family, provide for each other and to be able to take their children abroad to experience different countries and cultures, to pay for better education for their children...
After work and after a shower, everyone mucks in to tidy the house up, including the children. That is how we do it and in my opinion that's how it should be.
Educational system is rubbish nowadays...whether you go public or state school, critical thinking is pathetic...common sense is dying out. :/
Nothing wrong with what you said but the work a women does at home is not appreciated in todays society. They see it as a weak boring job when it requires a lot of energy.
I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
@blackpool i get it, really. im just saying the man should be the who does all you mention he should have that pride over his family and even if his wife does work, he should be the one to provide for the kids. i dont know, its not right to take a lady's wealth. its just weird.
As for the kids, they should be at school or nursery...
why, when the mother is capable of looking after and raising her own kids (minus the school), should someone else take responsibility. who is going to cook for them a nice healthy meal. i feel sorry for the kids, really they are the ones who loose out the most in this.
besides, the kids will become attached to the one who raises them and hence i doubt they will know how to treat their parents in their old age (and that does not include putting them in a nursing home )
Last edited by Ummu Sufyaan; 12-30-2009 at 09:51 AM.
...desperate for husnul-khitaam...
please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
format_quote Originally Posted by Umm ul-Shaheed
why, when the mother is capable of looking after and raising her own kids (minus the school), should someone else take responsibility. who is going to cook for them a nice healthy meal. i feel sorry for the kids, really they are the ones who loose out the most in this.
besides, the kids will become attached to the one who raises them and hence i doubt they will know how to treat their parents in their old age (and that does not include putting them in a nursing home )
Kids don't spend enough time with their parents. They are at school for like 8 hours and sleep for 8-10 hours... The government has full control over them during those 8 hours...sounds scary.
For some reason I wouldn't want to send my child to school. :/
EDIT: stupid typo. <_<
I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
format_quote Originally Posted by Blackpool
It's funny how women cry for equal rights yet when it comes to something like this they're more than happy to accept this. Women should be out there working just as men do. Women are more than capable of bringing cash into the house to feed the family and should do just that rather than sitting at home cleaning a few plates and then whining to their husbands when they arrive home that they've got it hard...!
and who looks after the family/kids in the mean time?
i am not against working but personally i cant see myself having a 'real' job for long unless i needed to. tbh why would i? at the moment i have everything i want and more/i dont take money from the govt for that and women who dont work do more than clean a few plates. because they dont work doesnt mean they dont do anything
as i said, im not against women working at all, but if women also want to be full time mums then they should have that option.
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Our Lord! Forgive us our sins and expiate from us our evil deeds, and make us die (in the state of righteousness) along with Al-Abrar
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
Women should be allowed to stay at home to mother their children until they become a certain age and old enough to go to nursery or school. I know many that have taken/take their children to nursery/school and then go to work (part-time) during the day. They finish work, pick their children up and return home. Extra cash for the household of which can be used, as in my case, for private tuition after school.
Re: Question: Can a husband forbid his wife from working, even though he agreed to ma
assalaam o alaykum,
women dropping their kids off at school and then going work and then picking them up when coming hoime is very bad for 2 reasons:
1) because studies show that mothers who are working are in greater chances of stress. i had an article about this, but cant seem to find it. women working causes them stress as when they come home (usually tired) they want to 'relax' but kids/husband/i.e, family still need their demands, this causes stress on the woman. im totaly against it (my opinion)
2) a child needs the love and attention of his/her OWN MOTHER!!! dont let others do the job of raising ur kids for u.... thier YOUR kids, dont let other teach them things which u will later on regret. If you 'dump' ur kids in some playday nursery, then wait until u grow old and they 'dump' u in an old age home! dont like being dunped in an old age home? then dont dump ur kids in some nursery or to some nanny thing.
children need the love of their MOTHER, not some other woman... Why is it, kids cry on their frst day in school (or nursery etc), because they want the love of their MOTHER!!!
plz dnt drop off (i.e, dump!) ur kids to some nursery/play day centre... kids needs the love of their MOTHER (and im saying this again and again so as to stress it).
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^women (at least in islam) have equal rights i guess its just in different ways. In Islam it is assigned to the husband to provide for his wife not vise versa. we didn't say women arent capable of bringing the bread home (we know they are), but she shouldn't be made to do something that isnt her job to begin with.
he should have that pride over his family and even if his wife does work, he should be the one to provide for the kids. i dont know, its not right to take a lady's wealth. its just weird.
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