To be happy with a woman is to understand her first (OP)
It has come to my attention that most of the men and boys here have a bit problems when comes to dealing women. Most of the problems that some of you shared are because of a woman :X
I’m not an expert on women but I hope what I share here will InshaAllah make you understand woman more and hopefully make your life happier.
These are mostly from my own observation and being a woman myself.
1. When a woman talks a lot and you had enough of it and you want to make her stop , so how do you do it?
First thing you have to remember that as a woman they ‘need’ to communicate to feel ‘connected’.
So don’t ignore her or watch tv or fall to sleep while she is talking. This will only make her talk more… lol :X
And don’t ask her to shut up after listening to her talk for a few seconds without really understand what she is saying. That can lead to a more serious scenario
The best is to let her talk for a few seconds, answer her a few times then after a few seconds just tell her nicely, darling I need to have my rest, to watch tv or etc.
2. When they complaint
Man always seems to think that when a woman complaints it is as if the world is going to end. “So what I’m going to do??? I can’t fix that!!!!”
The truth is they don’t want you to fix things. The woman wants a someone close to her to listen for all the bad things that has been happening. So be sympathetic and a good listener and InshaAllah she don’t feel she needs to complaint any longer.
3. They just being emotional.
So don’t blame her. Is just her body has more estrogen than you. Let her be emotional, is the way she has been created.
4. When she is being disobedient.
Just be strict and stick to your principle. This is to let her know that you’re the leader of the family and she has to respect and listen to you. But never ever be too harsh on her. If she is sulking let her be, for deep in heart she knows you’re right and InshaAllah she’ll try her best not to do the same thing again.
I think this is an important point since I’ve met a few couples who let his woman have her own way in so many things. At the end of the day the man can’t controlled her. Everytime they argue the woman surely will wins. So control the situation from the beginning and not regretting after that.
5. Shows your emotion.
For example show your affection towards the children, be sympathethic to the ones in need. Showing and sharing emotions will InshaAllah strengthen your relationship with your wife. The woman loves to know you’re the caring person and need a shoulder to cry on too.
6. They need support
Most of the woman they don’t really understand the competitiveness of this world. So be there for her and support her. Most of the time they felt they are struggling in this world alone. With your support the woman will feel more comfortable.
Finally and most importantly, being kind, understanding, show respect and be nice to each other are the keys to have a healthier relationship. InshaAllah with lots of dua and prayers Allah swt will unite you and you’re wife again in Jannah
25:36 And the true servants of the Most Merciful are those who walk the earth with humility and when the ignorant address them, they respond with words of peace.
A famous writer once said: if you want to be happy with a man, love him less and understand him more, but if you want to be happy with a woman, love her more and never try to understand her.
i think he was right....
p.s. great post sis syilla..
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by Ali_008
Is this really true? Ladies, please tell me? I thought if you don't agree to the woman's point of view then you can either forget about the food or you gotta sleep on the couch.
Do all women just wanna blabber without any concern for winning the argument?
is true... the ladies sometimes knew that she is wrong but she'll probably don't want to admit it.
If you can't live without her food...then i guess i can't help with you there.
i think literally you let her bully you.
format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
Women will do anything to win an argument they'll use anything against you for example
Sarah: Ahmad, why don’t you ever clean up after yourself?
Ahmad: (exhausted after making dinner) I was busy making dinner for the kids. You never clean up after yourself either.
Sarah: (Becoming evil) What do you mean I never clean up after myself? I make dinner all the time, and the kitchen doesn’t look like this! All you did was make a little bit of pasta!
Ahmad: (getting upset) I honestly cleaned after myself
Sarah: (increasing in intensity) Bull crap!! . You never do anything else. I have to do everything around here. I don’t know what I got from marrying you you're just a bald head i mean look at you , you bloody look like ET.
Ahmad: (Very hurt) Ok, then maybe you shouldn’t have married me!
Its shocking but im afraid its the truth
you copied from the net!!!! then thats just copy cat...doesn't support anything. If you know how to treat your woman and your woman is happy...she can never make you unhappy. She'll adore you more.
format_quote Originally Posted by aamirsaab
There should be classes in understanding women.
lol... i don't think anyone will finish the class then...
25:36 And the true servants of the Most Merciful are those who walk the earth with humility and when the ignorant address them, they respond with words of peace.
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by Malaak
A famous writer once said: if you want to be happy with a man, love him less and understand him more, but if you want to be happy with a woman, love her more and never try to understand her.
i think he was right....
p.s. great post sis syilla..
aww...you're so right.
to understand a man... is not by his words..but to look at his actions and what he likes. and they actually clueless what they want...so don't ask them what they want...because you'll never be satisfy with the answer. And also man always make mistakes...woman has to accept that especially to those man who is trying their best to make a woman happy.
25:36 And the true servants of the Most Merciful are those who walk the earth with humility and when the ignorant address them, they respond with words of peace.
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by Binyamine
You are the best Husband ever....And thanks for the advice
Btw what has happen to your wife's friend ZAINAB??? No new story on them...??
Thanks, you are as well,..... or will be?
Yeah, i guess they haven't really done anything crazy enough lately
Zainab had to go back to California wih her husaband for a week, a little while ago, to take care of their old home.
Zainab has been comming back over to the house more and now her sister is here (she brought her back for awhile) but she doesn't speak much English So only my wife and Zainab conversate with her....i just smile and wave
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by Ali_008
Is this really true? Ladies, please tell me? I thought if you don't agree to the woman's point of view then you can either forget about the food or you gotta sleep on the couch.
Do all women just wanna blabber without any concern for winning the argument?
it depends on what the view is, on both sides there must be limits, a husband must know the wife has opinions and feelings and the wife must remember the importance of obedience towards her husband.
Our Lord! Verily, we have heard the call of one calling to Faith: 'Believe in your Lord,' and we have believed.
Our Lord! Forgive us our sins and expiate from us our evil deeds, and make us die (in the state of righteousness) along with Al-Abrar
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by syilla
true...everyone need a shoulder to cry on . but i've give up :X i only cry to Allah swt...no one seems can comfort me enough...so i rather cry on the prayer map by myself huhu
That cant be true sis. Dont you have any good friend to talk too??
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by syilla
i don't think for those who talk alot... pausing for breath is an option.
lol you're right sis! I envy sisters who could talk non stop mashaAllah
My convos can put people to sleep. Or give them a good giggle at my ignorance lol
Here's an example of a recent convo with my brothers:
Me: Do mobile fone batteries give off radiation?
Bro 1: *looks slightly gobsmacked*
Bro 2: *looks perplexed*
Bro 1: Not really...
Bro 2: They might..
Me: So which part of the mobile gives off radiation then??? *feeling unsatisfied my mind isn't being given satisfactory input*
Bro 2: radiation is everywhere...
Me: *wonders where exactly is "everywhere"*
Bro 2 continues..: back ground radiation from the sun is always present in the atmosphere
Me: Oh! so there's radiation in space?
Bros: *crack up * no there's no atmosphere in space *DUH*
Me: I thought space was atmosphere
Bros: No
Bro 1: I think she means 'atmosphere' as in 'vibe, feeling' etc
Me: No! I mean atmosphere as in gases and stuff. That is atmosphere too! ffended:
Bro 2: No 'lol'....
Me:
Bro 2: Some devices give off more radiation than others. *gives examples of gamma rays - x-rays, ultraviolet rays, radiation in microwaves etc, electrical devices and so forth..
Me: *listens attentively - hungry for knowledge*
Bro 1: begins to dose off...
Bro 2: *gives few more details which I can't remember and points to Bro 1 saying he knows more about these things than him*
Me: *Looks over at other bro to see his eyes firmly shut and goes off to make food for everyone*
Is this a normal convo for a woman?
I hate talking about clothes, shopping, the weather eurgh! But I learnt something here. I should marry a GEEK who'd be happy to answer all my questions on anything and everything!
*suddenly feels like the most boring person alive : ((*
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
Well, well, I've read your posts with a great interest. I found them pretty caricaturistic and overwhelmingly testosteron-centered. Y'all are too rude to us women.
I married a very wonderful man. We get along very well (mashallah). We happen to argue every now and then but it never lasts long because I'm ALWAYS right! Guys have the tendency to watch a stupid game exactly when they know we're gonna watch our fave tv show. The problem is understanding us. For you, we go to the mall. In fact we go to the maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaall for we need to analyse every merchandise before we purchase the perfect item. You think we are superficial for we allegedly give importance to things you judge as futile. We give you the honor of sharing our daily emotional turmoils and our frequent feuds with our girlfriends just to make you feel important and involved in our lives.
I hope I convinced you that the idea you have on us women is totally wrong,lols.
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by bewildred
Well, well, I've read your posts with a great interest. I found them pretty caricaturistic and overwhelmingly testosteron-centered. Y'all are too rude to us women.
I married a very wonderful man. We get along very well (mashallah). We happen to argue every now and then but it never lasts long because I'm ALWAYS right! Guys have the tendency to watch a stupid game exactly when they know we're gonna watch our fave tv show. The problem is understanding us. For you, we go to the mall. In fact we go to the maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaall for we need to analyse every merchandise before we purchase the perfect item. You think we are superficial for we allegedly give importance to things you judge as futile. We give you the honor of sharing our daily emotional turmoils and our frequent feuds with our girlfriends just to make you feel important and involved in our lives.
I hope I convinced you that the idea you have on us women is totally wrong,lols.
the above post is testimony to what we males believe...if they can't go to the MAAAAAAAAAALL!
they'll nag and call you BAAAAAAALD! all day and make you feel angry for the rest of the week
im afraid its the shocking truth
Last edited by Cabdullahi; 01-15-2010 at 07:49 PM.
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
the above post is testimony to what we males believe...if they can't go to the MAAAAAAAAAALL!
they'll nag and call you BAAAAAAALD! all day and make you feel angry for the rest of the week
im afraid its the shocking truth
I dont agree with sis above, not ALL women love going to the mall. Not me anyway, so theres definetly exceptions for the rule. And why should you be angry because you couldnt go to the mall? Theres more days in the year sis..
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
lols.....
My post was very ironic. Everyone says "You women"...."You guys".....As though we were all alike. The gender battle will always feed debates and convos.
But it pleases men to see us with a condescending eye. Let's not contradict them,lol.
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by Nasiha21
I dont agree with sis above, not ALL women love going to the mall. Not me anyway, so theres definetly exceptions for the rule. And why should you be angry because you couldnt go to the mall? Theres more days in the year sis..
Re: To be happy with a woman is to understand her first
format_quote Originally Posted by zakirs
Thank you for ur post,
Sis how do you feel about hijab or how does one man approach a woman ( say his sister or a relative ) on the issue of hijab.
Men only need three things in their life , Food , TV/PC , bed/sofa . They are SIMPLE
Women are also simple we cannot compare our sisters to western women who like shoes,bags and clothing making them materialists..and our sisters are not like that!
Last edited by Cabdullahi; 01-15-2010 at 10:43 PM.
Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.
When you create an account, we remember exactly what you've read, so you always come right back where you left off. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and share your thoughts. Sign Up
Quote
(Very hurt) Ok, then maybe you shouldn’t have married me!
*wonders where exactly is "everywhere"*
ffended:
with 5 women yaking at me
Hide
Bookmarks