What is the ideal Muslim husband?

sabr* · 07-22-2010

سم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Bismillā hir Rahmā nir Rahīm
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Is the ideal Muslim husband a medical doctor, an engineer, multi-millionaire.

Is the ideal Muslim husband humble, gentle, kind, considerate, caring, loving, open to good advice, willing to cooperate with others in the family rather than dictate rules, helpful in the house, involved in raising the children, and never abusive either physically or mentally.

Use the Quran and Sunnah to show what you think is the ideal Muslim Husband. Insha Allah

This thread was created with the best intentions. Any positive feedback would be appreciated and encouraged.

Jazakumullahu Khair

sabr* · 07-29-2010

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

I am posting this with the best intention and hope that those reading put the best construction on it.

It appears some forum members (based on my review of their posts and threads) seem to feed on anything that can either ruin a thread, find an excuse to get off topic, or engage in quarrels. I ask anyone with the best intentions to delete any posts that contributed to senseless and unedifying communication. There is no need to defend a position. Just take positive action. Anyone with the best intentions can be duped into the quarrel trap.

Erase it and just replace it with Alhamdulillah!

Please carefully read the following Sahih hadith. Sukranallah!
__________________________________________________
Sahih Bukhari Volume 3, Book 43, Number 637:

Narrated 'Aisha:

The Prophet said, "The most hated person in the sight of Allah is the most quarrelsome person."
__________________________________________________

Sahih Bukhari Volume 8, Book 73, Number 42:

Narrated Jarir bin 'Abdullah:

The Prophet said, "He who is not merciful to others, will not be treated mercifully.
__________________________________________________

The Manners and Purification of the Soul section requires a revisit! Insha Allah

Jazakumullahu Khair

**Ummu Sufyaan** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by MysticRiver

The ideal Muslim husband is the one in the middle of an argument, when wrong, he admits and says "sorry" and when right, he just keeps silent.

agreed with that-well almost.

**Muslimeen** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by MysticRiver

The ideal Muslim husband is the one in the middle of an argument, when wrong, he admits and says "sorry" and when right, he just keeps silent.

Very true, cos when he is right it is the beginning of the next argument.

**Muslimeen** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by sweet106

Back to topic

Husband that assist with children and household...

He appreciate the work done by his wife...

So lets see,

He must go to work for atleast 8 hrs a day,
Stomach an arrogant and rude boss,
Come home to a nagging wife,
Kids who don't listen,
Help with their homework,
Assist with the housework,
Clean, wash, cook then,
he must appreciate his wife. Nice!!
I like that.

Reminds me of an old joke,

On the day of Qiyamah, the malaikah are busy sorting out who goes to jannah and who goes to jahannam.
Malaika: How many wives you have?
1st Person: One wife
Malaika: Throw him into hell
Malaika: How many wives you have?
2nd Person: One wife
Malaika: Throw him into hell
Malaika: How many wives you have?
3rd person: Two wives
Malaika: Put him into Jannah
Malaika: How many wives you have?
4th Person: Before I answer, I have noticed something strange, the first two guys who had only one wife you ordered them to be thrown into Jahannam, but the third man who had two wives you put him into Jannah, why is that?
Malaika: Please brother, please, try to understand, the man just came from Jahannam, how can I put him back there!!.

**glo** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by Muslimeen

So lets see,

He must go to work for atleast 8 hrs a day,
Stomach an arrogant and rude boss,
Come home to a nagging wife,
Kids who don't listen,
Help with their homework,
Assist with the housework,
Clean, wash, cook then,
he must appreciate his wife. Nice!!
I like that.

Are you speaking from own experience there?

**Vigno** · 07-29-2010

Asalamu Alekum

The ideal muslim husband is one who fears Allah, that is the key that opens many good doors like faith and love. A muslim who fears Allah would never do something that Allah forbids or dislikes. So congratulations to muslim women who marry those who fear Allah, and that fear means real fear and not something said by the tongue, but fear felt deeply by the heart. That fear will make that husband treat the wife fairly and seek her happiness. May Allah grant us all this fear, ameen

Allah knows best

Asalamu Alekum

**Muslimeen** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by glo

Are you speaking from own experience there?

No, from other peoples experience, I have a decent boss, no kids, could'nt cook to save my life and a wife who loves me to bits, why? I really don't know.

**glo** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by Muslimeen

No, from other peoples experience, I have a decent boss, no kids, could'nt cook to save my life and a wife who loves me to bits, why? I really don't know.

That's beautiful!

Isn't that the true miracle of love - being loved, even when we don't feel we have done anything to deserve it?
I am sure you feel the same way about your wife.

Praise God for his blessings.

**Muslimeen** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by glo

That's beautiful!

Isn't that the true miracle of love - being loved, even when we don't feel we have done anything to deserve it?
I am sure you feel the same way about your wife.

Praise God for his blessings.

But I fear that I will never be able to give her the love she deserves. May allah not take me to task on the day of qiyamah, spare me for my weaknesses and raise my wife's position in Jannah to nothing less than Firdaus. Ameen.

This is the dua I make for my wife whenever I can. Many a man needs to wait until he is sick or on his dying bed to know how much he is loved or how loyal his wife is to him, allah has given me this privelege while I am still strong and healthy. If I was caught infront of a runaway train and my wife had the opportunity to save my life and sacrifice hers then without a shadow of doubt I can say there will absolutely no hesitation on her behalf. May allah give her the best of both worlds. Ameen.

**Salahudeen** · 07-29-2010

I've seen quite a few posts saying a good husband is the one who shows his appreciation to his wife, how do women like to be shown appreciation? lol is it simply telling them "I appreciate what you do" or does it involve buying them something to show your appreciation?

I've noticed this in women some of the time, they say men don't appreciate them, so how should a man show his appreciation to them?

buy them some chocolates?

**Soulja Girl** · 07-29-2010

^He shouldn't complain, jus be happy & appreciate wah she does.. Well if she does the right things that is..

**Ummu Sufyaan** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by Muslimeen

So lets see,

He must go to work for atleast 8 hrs a day,
Stomach an arrogant and rude boss,
Come home to a nagging wife,
Kids who don't listen,
Help with their homework,
Assist with the housework,
Clean, wash, cook then,

she didnt say he has to help her out when he comes home from work...he can help her on weekends for eg

if he did so willingly, then he probably wouldn't have to hear her "nagging." problem solved.

he must appreciate his wife. Nice!!
I like that.

dont we all.

Reminds me of an old joke,

On the day of Qiyamah, the malaikah are busy sorting out who goes to jannah and who goes to jahannam.
Malaika: How many wives you have?
1st Person: One wife
Malaika: Throw him into hell
Malaika: How many wives you have?
2nd Person: One wife
Malaika: Throw him into hell
Malaika: How many wives you have?
3rd person: Two wives
Malaika: Put him into Jannah
Malaika: How many wives you have?
4th Person: Before I answer, I have noticed something strange, the first two guys who had only one wife you ordered them to be thrown into Jahannam, but the third man who had two wives you put him into Jannah, why is that?
Malaika: Please brother, please, try to understand, the man just came from Jahannam, how can I put him back there!!.

i forgot to laugh. common sense dictates that you you have such a big problem with something, then you remove yourself away from it. so if you think women are such a pain and are nags, etc then you shouldn't marry them. the jokes on you.

Originally Posted by squiggle

I've seen quite a few posts saying a good husband is the one who shows his appreciation to his wife, how do women like to be shown appreciation? lol is it simply telling them "I appreciate what you do" or does it involve buying them something to show your appreciation?

I've noticed this in women some of the time, they say men don't appreciate them, so how should a man show his appreciation to them?

buy them some chocolates?

you don't have to say it directly, you could show your appreciation to someone in other ways, like you sad buying her chocolates and other nice gifts. also writing a poem to her, telling her how nice her food is, how well she cleans the house, what a funny person she is... how much you are thankful for how she supports you...how good looking and cute your kids and have taken her genes. make nice comment about her good characteristics.

appreciation can be in words or actions. it can be preventing her from doing something harmful to herself doing. in short, appreciation is saying and doing things she likes to her and see from you. if she likes you to pray tahjjud, for example then you should do that because that's what she likes.

**Muslimeen** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by Ummu Sufyaan

i forgot to laugh. common sense dictates that you you have such a big problem with something, then you remove yourself away from it. so if you think women are such a pain and are nags, etc then you shouldn't marry them. the jokes on you.

Do we have to be so serious about everything in life? what happened to good ol sense of humour?? :grumbling

**Ummu Sufyaan** · 07-29-2010

^between that poem and your comments above it, it didn't seem like a joke.

**aadil77** · 07-29-2010

Can Bro Alpha Dude and Sister Unknown speak to each other and give any naseeha in private rather than in the open infront of everyone?

That would be a start

**Muslimeen** · 07-29-2010

Originally Posted by Ummu Sufyaan

^between that poem and your comments above it, it didn't seem like a joke.

I have strange sense of humour, my wife really knows about that, but can't expect everyone else to know that. Sometimes you get poked with a joke. I have been all too familiar with that situation so your replies are not at all alarming.

**Ummu Sufyaan** · 07-29-2010

^so? thats not what was being addressed.

**marwen** · 07-29-2010

ok guys I'm waiting for good characteristics of the Ideal Husband, so may be I try to apply them in the future :b. But I see that the thread become a "fight club" :^0
and I don't think this will help answer the question of the OP.