I was thinking of having another addition to the forum where we could have a specific Marriage Section where all marriage related stuff can be posted in.
Right now they are all over the place and it would be a great idea if this could be implemented.
Please if mods could think about adding it that would be great.
Looking at the sample pic, is that how IB used to look before?
If the forum wants to implement a matrimony section then it will have to be regulated thoroughly. There is a need for this, lots of people looking out there into marriage and as 'online' has become part of daily life it shouldnt be totally dismissed.
I don't wanna see threads like 'would you marry someone that is [insert silly words/controversial issue]
the would you threads give me chills.
i think I like the family and society section because all the relevant threads about marriage are pinned above and if anyone has problems in their marriage they can just post it under that section.
Actually I met my wife on the internet on one of those Muslim marriage websites. I about gave up on that site due to the scamming going on but she reached out to me and to find out that we lived only 3 miles from each other. Al-Hamdulilah. Well, the rest is our continuing history.....
I think what can be done is to create a sticky post or something, with a form of questionnaire. The people who are interested will have to send the filled form to the moderator in PM or something. I know it will increase a lot of work for the moderator, but is it possible that a trust worthy old member is selected to filter out the spams in PMs only specifically. I saw a very good questionnaire in the book blissful marriage. The moderator can remove the name of the actual person and then the details to the other person. I know its a lot of work. But just giving an idea.
I don't think a matrimony section is a good idea tbh, I can see that going haywire or leading to unnecessary free-mixing - we should leave that to websites specifically for that purpose. I like the idea of it just being a 'Marriage in Islam' section.
The call is ultimately the staff's of course but from what I have seen they deal with threads which are too nonsensical or pointless quickly - what if we made a subsection for marriage in the family and society section?
Ok, you know what I'm going to say, what if we do a quick trial . As in with the comparative religion section, which was a little more controversial, it was re-opened but so far it hasn't been *that* bad, at least I think so.
I think what can be done is to create a sticky post or something, with a form of questionnaire. The people who are interested will have to send the filled form to the moderator in PM or something. I know it will increase a lot of work for the moderator, but is it possible that a trust worthy old member is selected to filter out the spams in PMs only specifically. I saw a very good questionnaire in the book blissful marriage. The moderator can remove the name of the actual person and then the details to the other person. I know its a lot of work. But just giving an idea.
Can be modded the same as any other thread,
Nikah is 50% of imaan. Its like dropping an atom bomb on shaytaan, lol I never meant to, but it rhymes.
I don't wanna see threads like 'would you marry someone that is [insert silly words/controversial issue]
Yep like all sections, it would be moderated. So of course you won't see threads like "Would you marry someone with longer toenail?" .
format_quote Originally Posted by noraina
I like the idea of it just being a 'Marriage in Islam' section.
format_quote Originally Posted by noraina
I don't think a matrimony section is a good idea tbh, I can see that going haywire or leading to unnecessary free-mixing
Agreed. Would be better for them to go on online marriage sites as IB wasn't made for that purpose.
format_quote Originally Posted by noraina
Ok, you know what I'm going to say, what if we do a quick trial . As in with the comparative religion section, which was a little more controversial, it was re-opened but so far it hasn't been *that* bad, at least I think so.
Good idea!
format_quote Originally Posted by Umm Abed
If the forum wants to implement a matrimony section then it will have to be regulated thoroughly. There is a need for this, lots of people looking out there into marriage and as 'online' has become part of daily life it shouldnt be totally dismissed.
I'm open minded about anything. So even though I disagree with it, please do share more thoughts and ideas about it. Especially the original idea suggester
@Bhabha.
Show no concern for the praise of one whose praise cannot adorn you in any way, nor for the blame of those whose blame cannot dishonor you. And seek the praise of the One whose Praise is all honor and whose blame is all disgrace. Ibn Qayyim
since when is islamic forum a place to hook up? or "find a spouse". Those kinda threads should be closed down and maybe banned for week or so...
As for marriage advise maybe u could have one in each sister section and brother section cos might be sentive....dunno just throwing ideas in the air lol
Thought of that idea from the start. Current one can be changed to "Marriage" name, and all society threads etc will be moved to appropriate sections . Problem solved .
Yep so important I agree. Completing half your deen, how to spend time with one of the most important person in our lives and someone who will be 50+ years with you in this dunya and forever in Jannah .
That's also something you can decide on, its a good idea. Or else, just have one section for marriage related discussions and called it IB Marriage.
Id like to know why cant a matrimonial site be promoted here if it is reliable, as ibn-Adam posted; say if mods know that the site is on line with everything then why restrict it? Just my thoughts.
We already have too many overexcited kids (with big ideas about marriage) running around on the forum. Why open something which will lead to even more free-chatting? If you want to learn about marriage in a serious way, there are scholars who will be happy to help.
We need to revive our connection with the scholars, go to your local Ulama and learn from them.
There are also many books and courses available on the subject.
I'm pretty sure a discussion board is usually the wrong place to seek advice on marital issues, from what I've seen. Especially if it's a serious issue.
If the matrimonial websites on the internet are controlled by Islamic guidelines, then there is nothing wrong with going to them and making use of them. These guidelines include the following:
1 – They should not show pictures of the women, because looking at the woman to whom one is proposing is only allowed for the suitor once he has resolved to marry her, and it is not permissible for anyone else to look at her, and it is not permissible to enable anyone to do that.
2 – The website should not give detailed descriptions of the woman so that it is as if one can see her, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No woman should describe another woman to her husband so that it is as if he is looking at her.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5240).
3 – It should not allow any correspondence between the two sexes, because of the evils that result from that, including the participation of mischief-makers both male and female whose intention is to do evil or have fun. Rather the administrators of the site should first check on the identity of the suitor, then put him in touch with the guardian (wali) of the woman.
Secondly:
You should seek the help of your family and friends, and those who are in charge of Islamic centres, in looking for a righteous wife, in your homeland or in the place where you are staying. This is easy, praise be to Allaah, and it is safer and better than doing that via the internet.
Thirdly:
In order for the marriage to be valid, it is essential to have the consent of the woman’s guardian (wali), because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no marriage except with a wali.” Narrated by Abu Dawood (2085), al-Tirmidhi (1101) and Ibn Maajah (1881) from the hadeeth of Abu Moosa al-Ash’ari; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi.
And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no marriage except with a wali and two witnesses of good character.” Narrated by al-Bayhaqi from ‘Imraan and ‘Aa’ishah; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 7557.
And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Any woman who gets married without the permission of her guardian, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid. If he has consummated the marriage with her then she is entitled to the mahr because of the intimacy that he has had with her, and if there is a dispute, then the ruler is the guardian of the one who has no guardian.” Narrated by Ahmad (24417), Abu Dawood (2083) and al-Tirmidhi (1102); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’ no. 2709.
We have drawn attention to this because it may be thought that if a young man gets to know a young woman over the internet and she accepts him, this is regarded as a marriage.
Id like to know why cant a matrimonial site be promoted here if it is reliable, as ibn-Adam posted; say if mods know that the site is on line with everything then why restrict it? Just my thoughts.
The reason why we did not allow promotion of matrimonial sites is because most of them do not adhere to the guidelines mentioned in the above Fatwa.
We did not want to take part in promotion of links that might lead to something contrary to Islamic guidelines of searching for a spouse.
We already have too many overexcited kids (with big ideas about marriage) running around on the forum. Why open something which will lead to even more free-chatting? If you want to learn about marriage in a serious way, there are scholars who will be happy to help.
We need to revive our connection with the scholars, go to your local Ulama and learn from them.
There are also many books and courses available on the subject.
I'm pretty sure a discussion board is usually the wrong place to seek advice on marital issues, from what I've seen. Especially if it's a serious issue.
Just to add to that... Been noticing a lot of posts where individual opinions r being given or "what I think is correct" instead of members responding with sound knowledge from the Quran and Sunnah.
Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.
When you create an account, we remember exactly what you've read, so you always come right back where you left off. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and share your thoughts. Sign Up
Array
noraina liked this post
Subhanallah
. As in with the comparative religion section, which was a little more controversial, it was re-opened but so far it hasn't been *that* bad, at least I think so.
.
.
.
Hide
Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.
Posting Permissions
Quote
Bookmarks