can someone help me?

[amna ayyub]

i am so pessimistic about things. years ago i had a dream. i used to be a good kid. but then we moved to another city and bad things happened to me and i started complaining. i used to do good to her but she just kept deceiving me. yea she was my first friend. at the end i was distanced from islam and my beliefs. i want to go back. i am not at peace. what do i do? these doubts won't go away. i think Allah hates me that's why He let bad things happen to me.

[greenhill]

Welcome to the forum.

It is all in the state of mind. If that is how you feel then our beloved nabi pbuh,(from reading about him) should rank as the person most hated by Allah and Fir'aun as being amongst His favourites! Think about it....

What goes on in life is all a test. The good and the bad. Your choices determines who you are. Your perseverance and patience is what you are judged on. Making the right choices and being satisfied with what Allah has ordained for you.

Everyone has a choice. That is something Allah won't DO for you. He won't make the choices for you. He will give you options. In the extreme, we can either be constructive or destructive with our choices.

Doubts are caused by Syaitan by his whispers. If I wait for myself to be 100% ready before I pray, for example, I will most probably will never end up praying. So, although, I may have doubts about aspects of my prayers, it should not stop me from performing it.

When bad things happen, try to get closer to Allah. Remember Him, seek His forgiveness.

What will be, will be. It's how you deal with it (I repeat myself)...

Wishing you a great stay.