How do you Cope with Death?

**Dahir** · 07-08-2006

Simple Question!

How do you Cope with Death?

No, not YOUR death, that hasn't happened...yet!

I meant, say, someone you know dies; spouse, sibling, parent, uncle, friend, mentor, etc., how do you cope with the loss?

Personally, I haven't 'lost' anyone, say, in the last decade, and before that, I'm pretty sure my cognitive abilities were as absent as a murderer's heart.

Examples:

"I drank tea when my cat died"

"I visited the shrink when my papa died"

"I asked my Diety (God, or anyone holding Holy Power, like Buddha for Buddhists, Jesus for Christians, etc.)"

"I cried, had some Ice Cream, and watched Shindler's List to help ease my situation"

(((You get the Idea)))

Mods, if you feel this thread is unnecessary or too sensitive, be free to delete or close it.

**Ghazi** · 07-09-2006

To be honest I actually look forward to death can't wait for akhria is this strange and if all muslims had this approach then the greving process would be easier.

**Dahir** · 07-09-2006

To be honest I actually look forward to death can't wait for akhira is this strange

It is not strange at all to feel that way. I also await akhira because the idea of an idyllic paradise is X times better than the demon-possessed world we live in. The only things I like about this world is the save people's souls, the chance to build upon your credits to heaven, this forum, and educating others (something I don't do well ).

**S_87** · 07-10-2006

i get all upset especially if i see the body. anyhow i cry.

and because i dont go to the graveyard i picture these people going to grave, and for like the week think what happened to them.

but yh death is something that you see happening and when people die it reminds us that one day its going to be us.
people react differently, some hide their emotions

**IbnAbdulHakim** · 07-10-2006

Originally Posted by islam-truth

To be honest I actually look forward to death can't wait for akhria is this strange and if all muslims had this approach then the greving process would be easier.

bro i use to think this but death is scary, recently i've been praying for more time so that i can get Allahs mercy for jannatul firdaus...

You know if you get put in the lowest heaven, can you still go to firdaus at some point

**Ghazi** · 07-10-2006

Originally Posted by Abd'Majid

bro i use to think this but death is scary, recently i've been praying for more time so that i can get Allahs mercy for jannatul firdaus...

You know if you get put in the lowest heaven, can you still go to firdaus at some point

I heard in a lecture that there's things in janna that you won't ask for like doing harm to others something evil and that you won't want a higher place cause your so happy with what allah has given you and that you know those above you did more and deserve their place.

**Dahir** · 07-10-2006

I heard in a lecture that there's things in janna that you won't ask for like doing harm to others something evil and that you won't want a higher place cause your so happy with what allah has given you and that you know those above you did more and deserve their place.

That's more than anyone can ever ask for. So long as the person above me as earned their right, I am complete. And there's always a place called Hell.

**Djinn** · 07-10-2006

"I cried, had some Ice Cream, and watched Shindler's List to help ease my situation"

Now that is a bad thing to do, every man's death whether he is Jewish or Christian is followed with sorrow. Hatred is always defeated by death in the rightous mind. Although, Ice Cream is good for the human soul after a terrible loss, tea helps alot. Personnally, I talk regularily in spirit with my loss, for people who die in reality doesn't mean they die spiritually.

Salam alaikum

**Dahir** · 07-11-2006

Now that is a bad thing to do, every man's death whether he is Jewish or Christian is followed with sorrow. Hatred is always defeated by death in the rightous mind

No. You misunderstood. Watching Shindler's list is not because I hate Jews or insist, no, heavens no! I am implying that some people like to ease their pain by watching movies that help them connect, so they don't feel so alone in their situation, that was all.

**Asyur an-Nagi** · 07-11-2006

i lost my dad a year ago from a cancer. i was devastated and i was deep in sorrow.
but each time the dark hours stroke, i remember how he reacted toward his illness. he always encouraged me to be strong, to give up on nothing. he told me many-many times that cancer is how Allah washes his soul from his sins. he refused to be a victim of anything, and he did not want to mix a life with some sense of death. he is a true warrior. and thinking of that is how i cope with death.

**Takumi** · 07-11-2006

In 2005, I lost my grandmother (dad's mom) and my grandfather (mom's dad). Just 3 weeks ago, my uncle (dad's brother) lost his battle with brain tumor.

In all those cases above, I was thousand of miles away. All I got was some emails about their passing and maybe a phone call or two.

How did I deal with it?

I always tell myself, we die because it's time for us to die. Every time a person is born, his death day has also been reckoned with, just doesn't know when or where or how.

It helps me a lot to think about it that way.

**Dahir** · 07-11-2006

Just when the thread moves deep into "it," the death stories pour in .

Insha Allah, you guys have moved on and realized that your loved ones are potentially in a better state.

**IbnAbdulHakim** · 07-11-2006

Originally Posted by Dahir

Just when the thread moves deep into "it," the death stories pour in ..

lol comforting aint you :rant:

Takuma bro, inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi raajiun, i lost one of the closest people in my life aswell, it only makes you realise to Allah is our return and this dunya is nothing

**Sis786** · 07-11-2006

Everyone somewhere has suffered a loss all we can do is pray for thier souls and for Allahs SWT blessing and mercy on them!

**...** · 07-11-2006

I cried my eyes out when my uncle died:'(.... And then all i could do was pray for him from protection from the punishments of the grave and of the fire...

**Sis786** · 07-11-2006

Originally Posted by Asma1

I cried my eyes out when my uncle died:'(.... And then all i could do was pray for him from protection from the punishments of the grave and of the fire...

Aww bless sis may allah swt forgive his sins and grant him Jannat Firdous Aameen

**...** · 07-11-2006

Thumma Aameen!!

**IbnAbdulHakim** · 07-11-2006

Ameen thumma Ameen!

**Sis786** · 07-11-2006

Once my cousin bro died in a car accident but it was on the night of power in Ramadhan we were all distraught has he had been married for only 20 days But when we were all reading and when his coffin arrived at the house a calm fell over everyone and we never felt upset was a werid expereince,

**Djinn** · 07-12-2006

Originally Posted by Dahir

No. You misunderstood. Watching Shindler's list is not because I hate Jews or insist, no, heavens no! I am implying that some people like to ease their pain by watching movies that help them connect, so they don't feel so alone in their situation, that was all.

Salam brother,

If I misunderstood your statement then I apologize. It is essential for the rightous and the faithful to be freed from the shackles of anger and hatred for these actions do not serve Heaven but the opposite.

Death will be defeated inshAllah, but only when we are judge worthy as a whole. For the rightous, the virtuous and the believer will know eternal happiness, while the violent, the merciless, the betrayer will know eternal suffering. Allah (stw) is great in everything as well in punishment. So if someone who was close to you died and led a rightous and nobel life, cry but also rejoice for them, for he now knows eternal peace.

Salam alaikum