Calling out to all brothers and sisters for help please...

[IbnAbdulHakim]

:salamext:

True love never vanishes.

yes it does given enough time and distance


only marriage can make it last

 

[------]

if he dosnt care, why do u?

:salamext:

I don't think you've ever been in love. If you had, you wouldn't make this statement because you would not underestimate true love.

 

[AnonymousPoster]

buuut i can tell you that if someone wasnt interested on me, than i don't think i could be interested in them. id get 'put off' right away.

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

buuut i can tell you that if someone wasnt interested on me, than i don't think i could be interested in them. id get 'put off' right away.

agreed

i think its self-esteem issues more then gettin over the geezah.

its the thought of not finding someone better who you can FEEL TEH SAME ABOUT



its all about the feeling, its like a buzz, you felt it with the person and you just aint sure if you can feel it again.

 

[AnonymousPoster]

its the thought of not finding someone better who you can FEEL TEH SAME ABOUT

or maybe u cant get over the memories/good times you had, and ud miss that hmmm

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

or maybe u cant get over the memories/good times you had, and ud miss that hmmm

memories are so over-rated

its all about the present, people wanna b happy for the moment

the past wont affect you much if someone else is giving you those feelings, guaranteed

 

[anonymous]

buuut i can tell you that if someone wasnt interested on me, than i don\'t think i could be interested in them. id get \'put off\' right away.

yes yes, thats the correct mindset. ur only lettin him win by even thinking about him, when he couldn\'t even care less about you!

I don\'t think you\'ve ever been in love. If you had, you wouldn\'t make this statement because you would not underestimate true love..

what true love was it then if the guy no longer cares? that\'s what people call \"true love\"? more like a petty fling!

 

[Re.TiReD]

AssalamuAlaykum Sis Foz

I aint gunna say much cept u know wat it is u gotta do and how to get over the dude.

And I agree with the anon who said that if sum1 wasnt interested in dem, they'd be put off right away. Sis u only live once...Dont live it pining over somebody who couldnt care less. Sorry if thats harsh

 

[------]

buuut i can tell you that if someone wasnt interested on me, than i don't think i could be interested in them. id get 'put off' right away.

You were never in love then.

agreed

i think its self-esteem issues more then gettin over the geezah.

its the thought of not finding someone better who you can FEEL TEH SAME ABOUT



its all about the feeling, its like a buzz, you felt it with the person and you just aint sure if you can feel it again.

Then this wouldn't be classified as love. It would be classified as lust.

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

Then this wouldn't be classified as love. It would be classified as lust.

nope, theres another deception besides lust. dont be fooled

the buzz i was speaking about has absolutely NO intimate feelings involved, its the happiness of being around someone unlawfully

it causes feelings to develop, mostly longing for the person in question

yeah sure you can call it love, but to call something true love and grip it forever like a lion is, im sry, stupid

you keep things in your hand ready to throw away when necessary


whatever you call it, lust/true love or whatever, its a feeling which can diminish and be replaced with much better given the right conditions and circumstances

 

[Muhammad]

sister,

There's been quite a bit of advice regarding your circumstances, but there's one issue which I don't think has been addressed. This is really important:

i couldnt take it so i came home, and i went to see my uncle and his peer, they told me i had something within me, and ive had it for a while. so he gave me a taweez to wear and he prayed over me several times.

These people known as 'peers' have a lot of shirk associated with them - people believe they have the ability to do many things which in reality, only Allaah (swt) can do, such as increasing provision, knowing the unseen etc. Please have a look at these threads/links for further information and discussion regarding this:

http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/48993
http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/11402
http://www.islamicboard.com/tawheed-shirk/44574-saints-islam.html
http://www.islamicboard.com/tawheed-shirk/56406-peers-thrives-shirk.html


Regarding the taweez, then this also is a dangerous issue - please look at these threads for further clarification Insha'Allaah:

http://www.islamicboard.com/tawheed-shirk/27262-taweez.html
http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/20207


Protect yourself against evil by remembering Allaah (dhikr) and reciting Qur’aan, especially Aayat al-Kursi. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever recites it will remain under the protection of Allaah and no shaytaan (devil) will be able to approach him until the morning.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari). And al-Mi’wadhatayn (the last two soorahs of the Qur’aan) may also be recited.

I hope this has helped to clarify Insha'Allaah, and Allaah Alone is whose help is sought.

 

[F0z14]

hey every1 thanks 4 ur replies lol. i like the whole lion theory, sounds like a good idea, i jus need 2 put it into practise! sis jolie thanks again, im just having a weak day!

and im not in love!!

 

[Eric H]

Greetings and peace be with you F0z14;

You need to be truthful with yourself, you do not want to travel along the road of self harm at the start of term.

It may take you two or three years to get over your feelings for this man, you will not forget him; only time can ease the pain. It is a process you struggle with always one day at a time knowing that our God holds us in the palm of his hand.

Each day you fight these feelings you become a little stronger inside, you will have bad days and not so bad days. You may not have good days for a year, but you travel towards this always one day at a time knowing that our God holds us in the palm of his hand.

Somehow I have struggled through to reach the tender age of 59, and life for me is still about going through one more day at a time knowing that our God holds us in the palm of his hand.

In the spirit of praying for the strength, peace and serenity to live one more day,

Eric

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

and im not in love!!

in that case you should be able to get on with life without a worry

 

[------]

yeh it was just lust then was it?

 

[Re.TiReD]

yeh it was just lust then was it?

Nobody can ever put a number on love, on how much you loved/love a person and whether or not it was true, that is up to the person to determine.

Think about it, how would you like it if I came to this conclusion of you... You dont trust in Allah, you forget Him often so that means u dont love Him? Na'uthubillah sis. Dont make random assumptions.

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

yeh it was just lust then was it?

that question itself shows you didnt understand my post at all.


im saying NO MATTER WHAT YOU CALL IT, given enough time/distance/repentance/seeking help from Allaah etc , Allaah can replace the feeling with something much better



people need to understand this seriously !

 

[F0z14]

i dnt knw wat it is to be honest, i dnt knw if it was attachment,love, lust, infatuation, all i know is 5 months down the line im stil thinking and hurting about him

 

[AnonymousPoster]

You were never in love then.



Then this wouldn't be classified as love. It would be classified as lust.

maybe, maybe not. but whats that to do with it. love shoulnt be dictated by only emotions and feelings, it should also be dictated by common sense

if there isnt no mutual feeling, quit wasting your energy already

 

[F0z14]

Do u know what, im no longer bothered. here i am wasting my time over a guy who i shouldnt have even been involved with in the first place. i know this dunya is temporary so i should be spending my time doing what Allah SWT has sent us to do, worship Him and prepare for the Hereafter. Whatever's meant to happen will happen, i just need to remain focused on my Eaman and remember the real purpose of this life. i mean when and IF i do live to get married whats my future hasband going to think when he hears i was pining after another man. astagfirulla. and as for going back to uni, and these so called friends im worried about, Allah SWT has trully given me a blessing. its haram 4 me to be friends with these guys anyway so in actual fact i am really benefiting but sometimes i just fail to see it. and in regards to the EX, i had a lucky escape, if i was still with him i would have been living haraam and not practicising now. who knows if we will live to see tmro, and astagfirulla i would have died commiting a BIG sin. I KNOW that i have come out the better person, Allah SWT has given me a better way, i just need to start appreciating it.

when i go back, im just going to put my head down inshallah, stay away from the IN crowd, and if i see him i will lower my gaze and not give him the time of the day. cuz of him i messed up my exams, and when i go back i am going to work so hard inshallah that i come out with a 1st in my degree!!!

i know Allah SWT has saved me from so much haraam and sin, i was living in such a haram way, alhamdulilah i do feel blessed