Secular, Church, Muslim or Home School?

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Which is best education for the UK Muslim kids?


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:sl:

Are we just discussing secular subjects here? Or would we prefer to home school our children for all secular and Islamic subjects?

I'd love to homeschool my children, but I'd also like to hear from parents who are already doing it. How do they manage with all the other things they have to do? Work, chores etc?

akhi, you are in a simular situation to me with children of simular ages and the best person i think you should have to speak to about home schooling would be sharif, you teach his kids in your madrassa!

i have a spare home education pack if you want to borrow it and read it though.
 
:sl:

I know a load of boys that went to an islamic school, now their school finished at year 11 so they had to join up a sixth form college as there isn't any islamic ones yet, now they had developed their own little muslim ghetto way of talking and doing stuff, and it felt as they were living in another world, I don't think they could normally interact with other people.

Also they hadn't been exposed to the crap that goes on in normal colleges and school, so it was a big shock for them, which I think is dangerous as the shaytaan can lure you away as soon as you leave your nice fitnah free environment, as theres lots more temptations to handle at once. Some of them also felt as if they were finally free, lol. In the islamic school, they were made to pray their salaah during school, now in my college when I'd offer them to come and pray only one would manage to come, the rest would just want to 'chill'. So it just shows, that keepin people in an islamic environment isn't neccesarily going to keep them on the right path when they have to leave it.

Anyway, I think there are disadvantages to islamic schools as well as advantages
 
:salamext:

For me it would be home schooling, most likely. There is nothing more important than protecting my childrens' eemaan. I started going to a secular school since nursery, so I know what its like.

I think its quite strange that some of us seem to prize social skills above the danger of fitnah. 'Ajeeb. It reminds me of something I read regarding the biography of ash-Shaykh al-'Allaamah Ahmad an-Najmee (rahimahullaah):

The Shaykh, may Allaah preserve him, was born in the village of Najaamiyyah on the 22nd of Shawaal of 1346H and was raised in the house of his two righteous parents - which have no equal in comparison.

Due to this, his parents both made a pledge to Allaah by him that they would not burden him with any type of worldly jobs, and Allaah made what they wished come true.

They would both constantly keep guard of their son to the point that they would not even let him play amongst the children. When he reached the age of puberty, they entered him into the schools of the village, where he learned to read and write. He learned to recite the Qur'aan in the national school before the coming of the Shaykh 'Abdullaah al-Qar'aawee, rahimahullaah, three times, the last of which occurred in 1358H when he remained there.

Some people might be startled and even look down upon the level of protectiveness that his parents had over him, but look who he turned out to be. I'd much rather my son turned out to be righteous like him (and Allaah knows best), than be the most social person to leave the Western Educational Institutes. Nothing is more important than the aakhirah, wAllaahu A'lam. And as a parent, I'd try and make sure my chidl was developing at a healthy rate, and mixing with the right kind of children. I wouldn't isolate them and keep them in a closet. There is more to socialising than school. And personally, when I started practicing, I felt very much out of place in the Secular school system. And as for Muslim schools, I am not at all confident with the authenticity of what is being taught there, in terms of the Islaamic studies.
 
Obviously you'll have some school children that will have some good habits. But, will they have Islamic adab, ikhlaq, knowledge and understanding that I'd want to rub off on my children?

I'd not want my children watching any television, nor wasting much time on other forms of entetainment that has even the slightest bit of haraam. Would I be able to ensure that the other kids at school don't 'tempt' my kid into wanting something that he should know is bad for him?

Just because they are good human beings, does not mean they will be good influences. A kid could be the most well behaved and tolerant person in the world, but the fact that he learns to play the clarinet as a hobby, takes up dancing, believes there is no harm in having girlfriends, believes that all religions are equally valid and generally has a hippy, tree-hugging attitude to life, one that is in contrast to what Islam tells us, then undoubtedly, that is a very big danger and bad influence.

In this secular world that we live in, attitudes like that will no doubt affect people. Why would I want to put my child into an environment where I know that there is the chance that such unislamic ideas will creep into his head and given time, give shaytan the ammo that he can use to exploit and make my child's iman weak?

In fact, it is this subtle kind of negative influence that is the most important to safe guard against. The atheistic secular 'kufr' attitudes that they can potentially get into their heads is very dangerous to the iman. Like I said in another thread, we are living in the times of Dajjal and it is imperative that we take the most protective of stances toward the upbringinging of our children. If there is a chance that we can minimise haram influences, then we must take them, if we want them to be strong muslims.

As parents, we have a lot of responsibility for our children, Islamically speaking. We should want to make sure that they have only the best role-models, than to let them learn their own way being surrounded by people with little regard of what Islam says.

With homeschooling, parents have more control over their childrens' values. I don't want my kids having to learn Islam at home and then go to school to learn secularism. That would put my child in two minds and promote double standards and force the child to behave one way at home and another at school. I'd want my child to be firmly grounded in Islam. Islam should be the first and foremost standard. We don't live in a caliphate, where Islam is dominant. We live in a world where a lot of anti-Islamic ideas and practices are thought of as being the norm. We, as muslims, shouldn't want to be part of this 'norm'. We have our standard and that is Islam. Just because the full Islamic standard isn't available in school environments, does not mean that we have to live with and accept it. We can give our children a kick start to their imans by giving them a more dominant Islamic standard early on in their lives, one that is seperated from kufr, not one that lives side by side with it.

A good muslim mother/father would leave no stone unturned in ensuring that their children learn the best of morals and would even pay a lot of attention on their education. Compare that with a tired teacher who has a class full of 30 kids and can't possibly make time to give the attention that each individual child requires. Which is better for the overall well being of the child?

As muslims, our goal is to make our kids more Allah conscious. I honestly do not see that happening in secular schooling environments. Nor do I see that happening in Islamic scools. The best place I see that happening is at home, under the watchful eyes of people who really care for their childrens' akirah, afterall, that is the single most important thing.

We have the opportunity to reinforce their identity as muslims, we can safeguard them from an environment of peer pressure, gangs, experimentation, bullying etc. They'd have a healthy, safe, secure, Allah centred environment, if taught at home.

Homeschooled muslim children would get to practice their deen without having to compromise as they'd have to in traditional (non muslim) school environments. They'd be able to pray on time, they'd be able to go for hajj/umrah without interrupting their learning, they could take Fridays off, they could have lightened burdens during the Ramadan period to allow them to concentrate on their deen, same goes for Eid and other days of Islamic significance.

Just because children would be homeschooled, it doesn't mean that they'd be socially inept either. There are loads of other ways in which social interaction can be achieved - sports, hobbies, clubs, learning groups, family, other home schoolers, networks etc and of course, as muslims, they'd have interaction with other muslims at mosques when they go to pray.

Regardless of any perceived benefits in putting children in schools, the better option is one that helps promote a child's deen. I see homeschooling as the best candidate that does this from the list given by brother Dawud.

Right, very interesting and detailed post, an enjoyable read.

I understand your point now, it has become much clearer, but it seems what you think is right to do is the 'cage' children into Islam, give them no other opinion or view, no 'choice' to do what is right or wrong, they will do what they were taught from birth, and if brought up as you have described, a practising Muslim - which is not a bad thing at all. But: if the child was brought up in a public environment, sure, they have a chance of imitating peers, but children also ask.. a great deal, in my opinion. They are young and curious. They will go to their parents, guardians, older brothers, sisters, and ask them whether x is right or wrong, what their opinion is, what they think. It is pretty doubtful, though, that they'd imitate without asking a respected elder of the opinion - and this is where you can bring Islam in, what Islam says, and over time, the child may have both sides of the conflict in their mind, and make a decision for themselves, insha'Allah if the correct explanation is given (and this can be found literally anywhere if you look/ask in the proper locations with the help of Allah :arabic2:), they will pick Islaam insha'Allah, by the will of Allah :arabic2:.

Let's go back to fitnah.. even if the child is home-schooled, I will go back to my point about fitnah being everywhere. Even if the child stays well away from public schools and secularism, it can be found elsewhere and very easily: internet, books, media, and if you were to keep the child away from these, too? That'd be imprisonment.. and understand what I mean by imprisonment. Religion is not practise, but understanding also. The child must later on in life make his/her own conscious decision about religion, keeping in mind the atheists and their practises, the reasons they gave, the Christians and their practises, the reasons they gave, and ofcourse, us Muslims and our practises, the reasons we follow our religion.

I suspect you went to a secular school (correct me if I'm wrong) and masha'Allah, you seem to have turned out OK!

People are raised in terrible environments and masha'Allah, some revert to Islam later on.

It's about understanding all sides, developing that tolerance, understanding, and making a conscious decision based on unbiased resources which can be attained if searched for hard enough.

I'll take your point about days off for fridays, and ramadan - an advantage there. But a child can still attend mosque on fridays and fast in school during ramadan.. ofcourse, mind probably more focused on else than ramadan at those times.. so I'll take your point for that.

Going back to the socialising thing..

aadil77 said:
I know a load of boys that went to an islamic school, now their school finished at year 11 so they had to join up a sixth form college as there isn't any islamic ones yet, now they had developed their own little muslim ghetto way of talking and doing stuff, and it felt as they were living in another world, I don't think they could normally interact with other people.

Just want to say that I know of some who were home-schooled. They were cut of from their peers, felt isolated and didnt have as good a chance as others to socialise and develop the required social skills to get by in life.


Also they hadn't been exposed to the crap that goes on in normal colleges and school, so it was a big shock for them, which I think is dangerous as the shaytaan can lure you away as soon as you leave your nice fitnah free environment, as theres lots more temptations to handle at once. Some of them also felt as if they were finally free, lol. In the islamic school, they were made to pray their salaah during school, now in my college when I'd offer them to come and pray only one would manage to come, the rest would just want to 'chill'. So it just shows, that keepin people in an islamic environment isn't neccesarily going to keep them on the right path when they have to leave it.

Anyway, I think there are disadvantages to islamic schools as well as advantages

Agreed.



But then again, dawud_uk has had different experiences.. maybe a lot depends on the person him/herself?

I feel as if I have not explained myself clearly here at all.. I don't usually 'debate', so please try and understand my points!

And bro, this isn't a debate or anything. Just stating my opinions on the matter. :)

Yes, yes, ofcourse :).





I think its quite strange that some of us seem to prize social skills above the danger of fitnah. 'Ajeeb.

If this is directed at me, I strongly advise you go over my posts and retry to understand the point I'm trying to make instead of calling me, if it was aimed at me, weird.



And Allah :arabic2: knows best.


Now, in all this I haven't really directly responded to the thread.

Probably single gender (not mixed), Islamic or secular school.
 
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Islamic (Muslim) School.The kids can mix with each other.

:sl:

if they had islamic schools that fulfilled the requirements of an islamic education i would love to send me children there but often this is not the case.

like the rest of the british education system it is a broken system, on top of this too many 'muslim' parents who are totally non practicing get a wake up call when their little ones start misbehaving and think they can cure this by sending them to islamic school so some schools actually have more badly behaving, bad influence kids than secular schools.

this isnt always the case but everyone needs to check out the islamic schools in their area, i know muslim parents who home schooled due to the lack of good islamic schools, then moved to leicester before taking their children out of the 'islamic' schools due to problems.

this is before we even get into differences with the teachers over aqeedah and manhaj and the fact that many schools try to teach things a certain way and promote certain ideas.

example... an alim told us of one muslim school in leicester, on a flat screen in the reception is a message flashing up saying 'Allah exists without a face, Allah exists without hands...'

so straight away the first thing in reception they are promoting is going against the aqeedah of ahlus sunnah as i understand it (not trying to start a seperate debate, i'm just saying)

maybe if you had a strong well learned little one this wouldnt be a problem and they could argue back to their teachers when they promote something which goes against the teachings of islam but before you say you will send your kids to a muslim school each and everyone of us needs to check out the quality of those schools around us and look at how our kids will cope there.

:sl:
 
akhi, you are in a simular situation to me with children of simular ages and the best person i think you should have to speak to about home schooling would be sharif, you teach his kids in your madrassa!

i have a spare home education pack if you want to borrow it and read it though.

I've breifly spoken to him about it, insha'Allah I'll speak to him and a few other brothers again.

Has anyone home schooled their children or been home schooled on this forum? It'd be interesting to hear your experiences, please do share.
 
I've breifly spoken to him about it, insha'Allah I'll speak to him and a few other brothers again.

Has anyone home schooled their children or been home schooled on this forum? It'd be interesting to hear your experiences, please do share.

:sl:

but akhi you home school yourself dont you?

i mean i home school my kids, the oldest being 2 and a half. it isnt so different to progress from teaching my son his arabic and english letters and numbers, reading him childrens islamic books, teaching him Quran and nasheeds, this is home schooling.

it is so simple to go from here to teaching him little bits of knowledge, now i know more about home schooling it seems strange to me that people who have kids dont think they know anything about home schooling.

but inshallah people on here can give you some help as well. i know there is one brother who has already posted on this thread who home schools.

:sl:
 
whats with the veiw that homeschool kids can't socialize and can't accept different veiws blah blah blah?

I was homeschooled from the beginning till I finished. My mother homeschooled me. Yes at times it was a bit lonely, but my mother made effort for me to go to extra classes and meet people. Not all of my friends are muslim, and I get along with all of them.

And as a daughter I appreciate my mother soooo much because homeschooling is not an easy thing to do at all. It takes time, effort, planning, and of course you have to be extra smart. Not anyone can homeschool their kids. People are always amazed when I tell them how my mom homeschooled me.
 
:salamext:

Sis, please share some of your experiences. I'm really interested, as this is something I might plan on doing with my kids inshaa'Allaah.
 
:sl: Personally I would opt for homeschooling inshaa'Allaah as I myself plan on becoming a teacher, I could actually teach my child (or even children inshaa'Allaah) and instill that Islaamic lifestyle into them. If I could teach at a Muslim school then I would, and I'd teach my kid there too inshaa'Allaah, but I see home schooling as the better option.

When your children are young and innocent they can be easily swayed by those who surround them, so I would home school them as to teach them about the deen, the manners in which you are supposed to act, and that Islaam is a religion for all living beings. So that pretty much teaches my children about tolerance towards people of different backgrounds cause we're all one Ummah, of course. :)

Growing up in Canada and going to elementary, middle, high school, I find it to be a pretty bad place for a child to grow up in. Often times people equate home schooling with trying to ''shelter'' your kid from the outside world, but I see it as protecting my child's eeman (as Faizah already stated).

I felt so corrupted when I went to school, subhanAllaah the things I saw and how easily swayed I could get. I mean it is my parent's responsibility to raise me and to teach me about Islam, but sadly Quraan classes on the weekend never helped. imsad

Home schooling means in addition to teaching your child the basics, Math, Science, English etc. you can teach them about the purpose of life so they will automatically understand it and more and more as they grow up they'll already have it instilled.
 
So how long would you home school your child? till uni?

Personally I think home schooling misses out on alot of things. But also is beneficial in many ways.

I think for boys in a non-muslim country, it is important that they attend a secular school. Western society isn't a nice lovey dovey place, if you're isolated at home you're not gonna learn to deal with people, you're not gonna learn to talk. You need to have these skills to survive

Home schooling up to about high school, till year 5 might be ok, but after that I think it would be depressing for a kid to be taught at home
 
So how long would you home school your child? till uni?

Personally I think home schooling misses out on alot of things. But also is beneficial in many ways.

I think for boys in a non-muslim country, it is important that they attend a secular school. Western society isn't a nice lovey dovey place, if you're isolated at home you're not gonna learn to deal with people, you're not gonna learn to talk. You need to have these skills to survive

Home schooling up to about high school, till year 5 might be ok, but after that I think it would be depressing for a kid to be taught at home

:sl:

but can you see how it would be easy to bring many of the good things of secular school to home schooling without the bad stuff?

for example, i know there is a good muslim karate teacher in leicester, my son can go there for fun and exercise and socialisation that he can also get at madrassa or through friends.

the other stuff is mostly haram, why put your kids through it?

:sl:
 
Dawud, when you homeschool, do you have to demonstrate that you are teaching your children according to the British school curriculum?
Do you get visited by Ofsted or some similar organisation?
 
Dawud, when you homeschool, do you have to demonstrate that you are teaching your children according to the British school curriculum?
Do you get visited by Ofsted or some similar organisation?

peace be upon those who follow righteous guidance glo,

answer to your first question is no, but you have to demonstrate you are educating them in accordance with their needs and different local authorities interprete that differently.

2ndly, yes and no. it is not a legal requirement to register your child with the local authority so if they do not have your child on the register they are not bothered and if they do send someone around anyway you dont have to let them in.

however if your child did previously attend school he/she will be on the register and often (but not always) an inspector will within a few months of withdrawing a child from school come to visit and expect to some evidence of education.
 
Thanks for your reply, Dawud.

I am asking because I checked some homeschooling sites and there didn't seem to be any mention of Ofsted.

So theoretically you could teach your child things which are contrary to school teaching?
That seems very strange.
 
Thanks for your reply, Dawud.

I am asking because I checked some homeschooling sites and there didn't seem to be any mention of Ofsted.

So theoretically you could teach your child things which are contrary to school teaching?
That seems very strange.

yes, if you wanted to teach science without darwinism that would be allowable.

or if you wanted to teach that homosexuality is a sin and condemned by God that is allowable as well.
 

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