For six months of have been hearing whispers from the devil and I keep feeling like
I should pray for 3 days non stop and I will get cured or if I keep ignoring this I will eventually
become evil and everytime I ignore it I hear a lod bang in my house and as the days go by the whispers get worse.
I keep trying to tell myself this is only OCD but I think it has pretty much proven me wrong. The only problem is I have done
similar tasks before and right when I'am about to complete them they quickly change to something I know I would not be ablt to complete.
Like say I did it 2 days of it and I say ok only 1 more day and this will be over.. soundly I would feel like I have to do 4, at that point of
could either refuse and the whole thing would seem invalidated or I could agree to it.. and if I agree to it it will quickly change to 5 days
and I people tell me I'am crazy and that going without sleep will make me more crazy.. I sort of believe them but In order to do this I must go without
sleep for 3 days and I fear if this is craziness it would only make it worse. I also believe there is something evil next to my bed because I often get nightmares there and one time my little brother slept there
and he had a nightmare. For months I have been in a constant daze and the more I try to force my self to pay attention the worse it makes me feel. I could not stop praying
all day for a couple of months but I still felt like I was becoming evil and it felt like i was drinking fire
I keep praying for it to stop but nothings working finally I listened to my mom who told me to go outside but I still felt like I should be inside praying
I tried to push it all away and I have been doing so for months but I have felt a terrible burning senation in my chest and have slowly lost my since of right and wrong I have also
lost all my feelings and I feel like I'am dead inside and no how hard I try all I can think about is evil... and no matter what I say this is not insanity clearly.. something is wrong
I feel like god is warning me to keep praying and a solution would come but I feel like he wants me to keep praying non stop and I behind in my homework and I need to catch up but I know this is more important.
Also my parents keeps asking me why I'am not studying and I try to explain to them this but they don't believe me no one will, and they think i'am doing this out of choose and cause I got to much free time on my hand but
I'am not. This is the only thing I have thought about for days. first it was telling me to call god names Now it is telling me join partners with god when I pray so I can't even pray(without breaking my prayers and doing the wudoo).. and I don't know who I'am anymore, rather
I'am good or bad it has made me do so much wrong.. I just wish my parents would understand this is a problem, THEY WON'T LISTEN TO ME, this is real this is real. I don't know if god is testing me or not. but how can I make her understand that
I can't do my homework now this is much more important.
I should pray for 3 days non stop and I will get cured or if I keep ignoring this I will eventually
become evil and everytime I ignore it I hear a lod bang in my house and as the days go by the whispers get worse.
I keep trying to tell myself this is only OCD but I think it has pretty much proven me wrong. The only problem is I have done
similar tasks before and right when I'am about to complete them they quickly change to something I know I would not be ablt to complete.
Like say I did it 2 days of it and I say ok only 1 more day and this will be over.. soundly I would feel like I have to do 4, at that point of
could either refuse and the whole thing would seem invalidated or I could agree to it.. and if I agree to it it will quickly change to 5 days
and I people tell me I'am crazy and that going without sleep will make me more crazy.. I sort of believe them but In order to do this I must go without
sleep for 3 days and I fear if this is craziness it would only make it worse. I also believe there is something evil next to my bed because I often get nightmares there and one time my little brother slept there
and he had a nightmare. For months I have been in a constant daze and the more I try to force my self to pay attention the worse it makes me feel. I could not stop praying
all day for a couple of months but I still felt like I was becoming evil and it felt like i was drinking fire
I keep praying for it to stop but nothings working finally I listened to my mom who told me to go outside but I still felt like I should be inside praying
I tried to push it all away and I have been doing so for months but I have felt a terrible burning senation in my chest and have slowly lost my since of right and wrong I have also
lost all my feelings and I feel like I'am dead inside and no how hard I try all I can think about is evil... and no matter what I say this is not insanity clearly.. something is wrong
I feel like god is warning me to keep praying and a solution would come but I feel like he wants me to keep praying non stop and I behind in my homework and I need to catch up but I know this is more important.
Also my parents keeps asking me why I'am not studying and I try to explain to them this but they don't believe me no one will, and they think i'am doing this out of choose and cause I got to much free time on my hand but
I'am not. This is the only thing I have thought about for days. first it was telling me to call god names Now it is telling me join partners with god when I pray so I can't even pray(without breaking my prayers and doing the wudoo).. and I don't know who I'am anymore, rather
I'am good or bad it has made me do so much wrong.. I just wish my parents would understand this is a problem, THEY WON'T LISTEN TO ME, this is real this is real. I don't know if god is testing me or not. but how can I make her understand that
I can't do my homework now this is much more important.