Major issue with wife after conversion talk

[markislam]

so finally today i told my wife that i converted to Islam.

I told her so many things.

she is hurt bad and she is still crying. she says muslims worship the moon god , and asked why they have the moon.

She says i am dead to her now, don't know what to do. I told her i want to be in the islamic community she said **** it and burst crying.

She asked me about slaying of animals and about Jesus dying on the cross.

She asked me if slaying of animals is allowed in Islam and i said no mohammed said no hew

i am so confused now. i feel like running away some where so i cant see any one.

can some one guide me

 

[GuestFellow]

Salaam.

Well I think she is just shocked. She will calm down eventually. You need to clear up some misconceptions she has about Islam. I would talk to her more about Islam when she is calmed down...

You'll be fine Inshallah. Ask her about all the misconceptions she has about Islam. Post them all on the forum and one by one we will tackle each misconception she has of Islam.

 

[Aisha20]

Give her time. She is still shocked!

 

[//-Asif-\\]

Wow.

Brother, I'm happy that you converted and all and as it's been said your wife is in shock that needs to be worn off. So from fear of what she'd say and whatnot, all this time you had studied and learned about Islam without her being the least bit aware of your interest, nor did you at least have small chit chats about findings and the like. I'm sure this shock would've been prevented if this wasn't all done in seclusion. I mean it is your wife after all, ya'll should be able to share everything together amicably.

 

[markislam]

She is upset with me and not even talking to me. the biggest trouble is when the family knows about my conversion, they will swarm like bees from all over the place

 

[Cabdullahi]

who told her about the moon god hype

"See you not that to Allah bow down in worship all things in the heavens and on earth, the sun, the moon, the stars.......... " (22:18)

"Allah is He, who created the sun, the moon, and the stars (all) governed by laws under His commandment." (7:54)

 

[kwolney01]

As the others have said she is clearly in shock and I would give her some time to calm down. I would try to give her some information on Islam and let her know why you converted.

I'm sorry, is she Christian brother? If she is, tell her about the similarities between Islam and Christianity and that Muslims believe in One God just as Christians do. It is surprising that she never knew you were learning about Islam and that you never told her about it.

I would do the same to your family. Tell them about Islam and try to relate to them.

I wish you the best brother and may Allah make things easy on you Ameen.

 

[جوري]

Moon God? as absurd as that is, I still find Jesus as a god even more absurd..
nonetheless, you can surely dispel her doubts.. I think you are not firm with her about your convictions, this isn't a matter where she frankly has a say.. in fact this isn't a matter where anyone has a say save for the individual!
what a shame that the church is so ashamed of its own beliefs, it has to makeup for its short comings by spreading false rumors about other religions.. shouldn't that tell her something about Christianity rather than islam?


6:96 He it is that cleaveth the daybreak (from the dark): He makes the night for rest and tranquillity, and the sun and moon for the reckoning (of time): such is the judgment and ordering of (Him), the Exalted in Power, the Omniscient.





7:54
Your Guardian-Lord is Allah, Who created the heavens and the earth in six Days, then He established Himself on the Throne (of authority): He draweth the night as a veil o'er the day, each seeking the other in rapid succession: He created the sun, the moon, and the stars, (all) governed by laws under His Command. Is it not His to create and to govern? Blessed be Allah, the Cherisher and Sustainer of the Worlds!





10:5


It is He Who made the sun to be a shining glory and the moon to be a light (of beauty), and measured out stages for it; that ye might know the number of years and the count (of time). Nowise did Allah create this but in truth and righteousness. (Thus) doth He explain His Signs in detail, for those who understand.










13: 2

Allah is He Who raised the heavens without any pillars that ye can see; then He established Himself on the Throne (of Authority); He has subjected the sun and the moon (to His Law)! Each one runs (its course) for a term appointed. He doth regulate all affairs, explaining the Signs in detail, that ye may believe with certainty in the meeting with your Lord.


21:33

It is He Who created the Night and the Day, and the sun and the moon: all (the celestial bodies) swim along, each in its rounded course.



25:61



Blessed is He Who made constellations in the skies, and placed therein a Lamp and a Moon giving light;





35:13



He merges Night into Day, and He merges Day into Night, and He has subjected the sun and the moon (to His Law): each one runs its course for a term appointed. Such is Allah your Lord: to Him belongs all Dominion. And those whom ye invoke besides Him have not the least power.



41:37


Among His Signs are the Night and the Day, and the Sun and the Moon. Adore not the sun and the moon, but adore Allah, Who created them, if it is Him ye wish to serve.


what is the excuse for ignorance after this?
You'd think their orientalists would browse the Noble Quran before they malign it and render us Idol worshipers the likes of them ..

sob7an Allah..what impressionable malleable patsies buy into this crap!

I feel rather offended that such people still exist!

 

[kawaiigardiner]

She is upset with me and not even talking to me. the biggest trouble is when the family knows about my conversion, they will swarm like bees from all over the place

It sounds like your wife is a Christian fundamentalist who no how much evidence you provide will only change her mind of her own accord. I was going to ask you to quote the pope who made it clear that Muslims, Jews and Christians all worship the same God.

 

[YusufNoor]

Sabr Akhi,

give her a little time to regain her composure. she may ask questions that you don't know the answer to. don't lie, and if you are unsure, just say i don't know.

. she says muslims worship the moon god , and asked why they have the moon.

the moon [cresent] thingy is just there because we still use the lunar calendar and therefore people actually look for the cresent for new months to begin, as for having it all over flags and Masjids, it's bidaah.

She says i am dead to her now, don't know what to do. I told her i want to be in the islamic community she said **** it and burst crying.

She asked me about slaying of animals and about Jesus dying on the cross.

we don't believe that Jesus died on the cross. you MAY have a time explaining that one

She asked me if slaying of animals is allowed in Islam and i said no Mohammed said no

you are not allowed to kill anyone or anything except in the name of Allah. IF she is meaning "halal" slaughter, then your answer was incorrect. the Halal way is the MOST merciful way to kill an animal. it shouldn't be a problem once you've explained it.


here's a link to some shows by Yusuf Estes, former Christian Minister. he explains all about Islam in them:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhz3_CpCQ6w&feature=SeriesPlayList&p=E2F0E4327E0B7A77

most of your questions can be answered here, especially the Jesus question [well, except the crucifixion part].

actually, use this link:

http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=E2F0E4327E0B7A77

here's an EXCELLENT lecture by Abdur Raheem Green, a former Christian, called Islam: The Religion of Truth:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCgj6p3JTLg

he further explains most of the points that he makes from that lecure in this series, The Proof that Islam is True:

http://www.turntoislam.com/forum/showthread.php?t=55684

May Allah make it easy on you and may He guide and assist you!

:wa:

 

[Humbler_359]

Yes, in fact, alot of Christians believe that Muslims are worshipping Moon even my friends used to be asked this same questions because they were mislead by their own churches and websites in false propagandas.

Take your time and relax for a while, I had sort of experiences with "shocked", it will get better later when you both willing to listen, learn, and explain, Insha'Allah!

 

[markislam]

she says i am selfish and i did not think of family but my question is how i am i selfish when it comes of matter of faith it is not selfish.

She said i am so sad we cant even see each other , i asked her cant see each other where, she said in heaven .

I told her God decides who goes to heaven not us.

She is so depressed because of it she vomited two times yesterday night . I feel so guilty i should not have told her this now.

but again i had to tell her one day or the other.

 

[cat eyes]

she says i am selfish and i did not think of family but my question is how i am i selfish when it comes of matter of faith it is not selfish.

She said i am so sad we cant even see each other , i asked her cant see each other where, she said in heaven .

I told her God decides who goes to heaven not us.

She is so depressed because of it she vomited two times yesterday night . I feel so guilty i should not have told her this now.

but again i had to tell her one day or the other.

I wonder what ignorant people told her we worship the moon. You see these people are so use 2 of worshipping idols and humans that they cant see anything past that, weathr its saints or prophet's. They cant imagine a god that dont have human like features and elephant headz and you name it. There god has 2 look like something in this world. They are so deluded from the truth. I would give her time and when she ready you can tell her about islam.

 

[markislam]

I totally agree with you, people want to think of god as a physical person who they can see they dont want to accept the real God who does not have human like features. i was thinking of the same today

 

[peaceandlove]

so finally today i told my wife that i converted to Islam.

I told her so many things.

she is hurt bad and she is still crying. she says muslims worship the moon god , and asked why they have the moon.

She says i am dead to her now, don't know what to do. I told her i want to be in the islamic community she said **** it and burst crying.

She asked me about slaying of animals and about Jesus dying on the cross.

She asked me if slaying of animals is allowed in Islam and i said no mohammed said no hew

i am so confused now. i feel like running away some where so i cant see any one.

can some one guide me

brother

Well , reading your message its seems that your wife has many many mis-conceptions about Islam, try to remove his mis-conceptions by giving him some books or online materials , tell him that what he was thinking was wrong and i think your wife just see whatever on media accept it , prove him that all that he was thinking was wrong.

Ask him the question , for which she was confused , then tell him that she was thinking wrong.

If you need any help from us , we will try our best to help you.

Ask help from Allah to turn his heart/mind.

May Allah help you and guide us all toward the right path.

 

[markislam]

she is upset that i converted and it was a surprise for her.

well today morning she asked me why did i leave God and go to a totally different religion. I said Islam is not a religion , she said then why do you pray 5 times a day and face mecca when you pray if it is not a religion, you have to cleanse your self when you pray , she said God looks at your heart not if you cleansed or not.

I told her Islam is all about following one God, then she says then follow one God why be in Islam which is a religion.

She says she always felt the presence of Evil spirit around muslims

She says she does not trust me any more

 

[UmmSqueakster]

To the muslims on this forum - how would you react if your spouse converted to christianity? You'd probably have a very hard time accepting that fact, wouldn't you?

Mark, as I've offered before, I would be happy to email with your wife, so that she could have the opportunity to speak with an american woman, born and raised, who just so happens to be a muslim. I think part of the shock is that she has some ideas about what islam is that are untrue, and inshaAllah with knowing real muslims, that can be overcome.

http://umms.wordpress.com/contact/

The other is that you've hurt her in changing something that is obviously important to her. That you will have to work on yourself.

 

[convert]

she says i am selfish and i did not think of family but my question is how i am i selfish when it comes of matter of faith it is not selfish.

She said i am so sad we cant even see each other , i asked her cant see each other where, she said in heaven .

I told her God decides who goes to heaven not us.

She is so depressed because of it she vomited two times yesterday night . I feel so guilty i should not have told her this now.

but again i had to tell her one day or the other.

Sounds like she is playing emotional games with you to be honest.

You have NOT acted wrong in any manner. It is tough for converts such as you and I to tell family members of the conversion. It took me nearly a year to tell my mother.

Do not grovel to her akhi. Just be patient and give dawah in the best manner you see fit. Do not let her play games with you though, make sure to be direct and demand her to be direct as well. At all times, have taqwa. I will remember you in my duas. My mother had problems at first but she now defends islam when people attack it.

 

[Hamas]

Give her some time and space to get her head round it and dont be in her face 24/7 in the meantime think about how you can answear questions and maybe expose her somehow to things that will help her to become more convinced the bros and sis here can help you with that too but always make dua first and ask Allah to guide you.

 

[czgibson]

Geetings,

she is upset that i converted and it was a surprise for her.

You could perhaps have softened the blow by letting her know you were getting interested in Islam. If she had known you were thinking about converting for a while before it happened it would have been a lot easier for her.

Maybe you did do this, though - I don't know all the details.

well today morning she asked me why did i leave God and go to a totally different religion. I said Islam is not a religion , she said then why do you pray 5 times a day and face mecca when you pray if it is not a religion, you have to cleanse your self when you pray , she said God looks at your heart not if you cleansed or not.

I don't know what your wife's religion is, but it's very likely that you both worship the same god, no?

I told her Islam is all about following one God, then she says then follow one God why be in Islam which is a religion.

Because Islam is a purely monotheistic religion?

She says she always felt the presence of Evil spirit around muslims

She says she does not trust me any more

It's a difficult situation and I hope things work out for both of you. All the best.

Peace