Wedding traditions in the world

[latiffa]

I want so much to know more about the wedding traditions from any places of the world. I think that not everywhere the peoples have the same steps for getting marry. :smile:

 

[Rafeeq]

Sure wedding cermonies are comprises of two events, one is religious & the other part is traditional. So, specially 2nd part is different in different parts of the world. Even it could be different in one country but different regions.

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

i think it depends on whether the family's are traditional/cultural or religious. i think with cultural, you'll have more of a headache, then with religious.

i wasn't bought up all that culturally, so i cant really say what the wedding traditions are like in my culture though im sure we've had some cultural influence in our weddings/marriages in one way or another. the only thing that i can think of for now is that cultural people want it mixed or at the least have the groom sit next to the bride in the hall full of the lady guests (so its meant to be an all ladies affair, but its okay for the husband to sit there cos apparently he's only looking at his wife :hmm...some people may find that odd if the groom isnt there. also cultural people like to play haraam music as well <---that ones really hard to get away from...

unfortunately in my culture you may get the odd idiot who nicks off with his wife's wealth/mahr, makes it sound like he doesn't have any money to pay her her mahr(but alhamdulillah that tends to be rare)...

 

[latiffa]

Sure wedding cermonies are comprises of two events, one is religious & the other part is traditional. So, specially 2nd part is different in different parts of the world. Even it could be different in one country but different regions.

U have exactly right...but I want to know more, for example, witch are these traditions in ur country, city,...if u don.t mind. :smile:

 

[latiffa]

i think it depends on whether the family's are traditional/cultural or religious. i think with cultural, you'll have more of a headache, then with religious.

i wasn't bought up all that culturally, so i cant really say what the wedding traditions are like in my culture though im sure we've had some cultural influence in our weddings/marriages in one way or another. the only thing that i can think of for now is that cultural people want it mixed or at the least have the groom sit next to the bride in the hall full of the lady guests (so its meant to be an all ladies affair, but its okay for the husband to sit there cos apparently he's only looking at his wife :hmm...some people may find that odd if the groom isnt there. also cultural people like to play haraam music as well <---that ones really hard to get away from...

unfortunately in my culture you may get the odd idiot who nicks off with his wife's wealth/mahr, makes it sound like he doesn't have any money to pay her her mahr(but alhamdulillah that tends to be rare)...

Thanxx my sis! Are so interesting ur words ... exactly what I wanted, to know more from any country :smile:

 

[Woodrow]

Thanxx my sis! Are so interesting ur words ... exactly what I wanted, to know more from any country :smile:

Here in the USA there is no such thing as an American Cultural wedding except for the traditional wedding ceremonies of the different Native Americans. Most people will follow the traditions of their ancestral culture. If you are in the Iranian section of Los Angeles, the wedding will be traditional Iranian, if you are in the German community of Fredricksburg Texas, it will be a Traditional German wedding. if you are in the Arabic Section of Dearborn Michigan, it will be a traditional Arabic wedding. etc.

The Traditional wedding of the Lakotah Sioux is simple:

In the old days, marriages were usually arranged by the parents in both Sioux and Cherokee society, and the formal request for a bride was made by presenting gifts (the bride price - usually food, blankets, and fine clothing, and later horses) to the bride's parents, who made the decision to accept or reject the marriage proposal for the girl.

Most marriages were arranged this way, although there were a few romantic marriages instigated by the young people.

Sioux Courtship and Wedding Customs


In Sioux culture it was usually the fathers who negotiated the marriage, looking for like minded political alliances, or a social tie that would strengthen the stature of the bride's family in the community, or an acomplished hunter or warrior who would be an asset in providing for and protecting the whole extended family.

While Sioux fathers took the lead and had the final say in such matters, mothers did the steering, and heavily influenced the stance taken by the fathers. Often the father would consider the wishes of a favored daughter, but this wasn't always the case.

If gifts were accepted and the father approved, the girl would have no say in the matter, even if she was opposed to the marriage.

Sioux girls were taught that chastity before marriage was such a virtue, that even an implied loss of it would prevent them from being worthy of praying to the Great Spirit. This was so ingrained into their culture and belief system that they would not even look directly at a member of the opposite sex that was not a family member, and they were given few opportunities to be alone with potential suitors. A good Sioux daughter would never let herself get into such a predicament.

Sioux girls usually married shortly after having their pueberty rites, which were held when they reached mensus, but males were expected to participate in at least one or more successful war parties or horse raids to prove their valor and courage before they were considered worthy of a wife, so the average Sioux groom was usually quite a bit older, sometimes by as much as 20 years or more.

Older women might also be aquired as wives when a spouse was killed. The brother of the deceased was expected to marry his brother's widow. Occasionally, a divorced person would remarry, but this was rare because it wasn't socially acceptable. Divorce was accepted, but divorced people were expected to remain single for the rest of their lives. Those who did remarry were often ostracized from their band.

Because there were more women than men due to casualties of war and hunting accidents, most Sioux men had two or more wives. Often a man married sisters. This family tie helped to keep bickering and jealousy among the wives to a minimum. A man could have as many wives as he could afford to care for, and more wives meant less work for the women.

Today, a Sioux Wedding Prayer would probably be included in the ceremony, but in the old days, a Sioux wedding was very informal. Once a son announced his intention to seek a bride, his mother would begin making a new elk skin lodge and gathering materials for the interior furnishings needed for daily living. The new lodge wouldn't be set up right away, but would probably be erected the next time the village moved their camp.

When a new lodge went up, the whole village knew a marriage proposal would soon be coming and watched to see at whose lodge the bride gifts would be left. The typical price for a bride was 1-4 horses and various goods, but if the gifts weren't immediately accepted, the hopeful suitor might add more horses and other gifts as the day progressed.

On very rare occasions up to forty horses were offered, and there have been a handful of recorded bride prices of over 100 horses. If the bride gifts weren't accepted by the end of the day, the suitor would come to collect them, losing much face in the process.

If the proposal was accepted, the bride and her father would come out to inspect the gifts, then lead the horses off to join their herds and distribute the other gifts among relatives and tribal members in need.

Sioux Marriage Ceremony


The next morning arrangements were made for the usual marriage festival which consisted of feasting and the performance of a dance in which only the women took part. In this dance the women and children form a large circle in the center of which four or five drummers are beating the drum while others are cooking and dishing out soup and meat to the persons composing the circle. These, as soon as they had partaken of food, joined the dancers within the circle and danced until they were weary and then fell back to the circle and in a sitting posture rested and ate again.

This dance continued during the entire day. As late afternoon approached, the betrothed couple, accompanied by a number of their friends, visited their new abode and made an inspection of the premises and visited until the master of ceremonies appeared on the scene and announced that the hour of proclaiming their marriage had arrived.

Next, four warriors spread a large blanket, with each one taking hold of a corner and holding it high in the air. The wedding couple stepped under it while the remainder of the party formed a line in the rear. The medicine man took the lead then gave the order to march.

The four warriors, each holding a corner of the blanket with one hand and a spear in the other, marched through the village, while the master of ceremony, arrayed in paint and feathers and holding a green ash wand that he used as a baton, loudly proclaimed the nuptial knot and sounded the praises of the happy pair.

The ceremony was not concluded until near sundown, the progress of the march being continually interrupted by the proffered congratulations of friends.

After the pageant had ended, the couple separated, but, when night began to spread over the village, the groom went to his new home and kindled a fire. Shortly afterwards his closest friends began to assemble, and, as darkness fell, a small procession composed entirely of women approached the lodge singing and bearing torches. These were the personal friends and relatives of the bride and they were carrying her in a blanket supported by six women.

When they came to the lodge, the flap of the door having been thrown back for the occasion, they entered and deposited their burden at the feet of her husband, who, in playful imitation of "counting coup" [pronounced "coo"] on an enemy, struck her with the ramrod of his rifle exclaiming "You are mine."

This ended the ceremony, and the wife at once began her household duties by preparing supper for their mutual friends, who remained and spent the evening with them.

SOURCE:http://www.aaanativearts.com/article1522.html

 

[latiffa]

Bro Woodrow ur nice post made me to remember all the books where I read about sioux. I was fan at the ancient life of the indiens and still I like to see with pleasure any new things about them. Thanxx for ur informations who made me to see with the eyes of my mind all traditional weding at that peoples! :smile:

 

[north_malaysian]

In Malaysia:

1) Merisik Ceremony

"Merisik" is a ceremony when the parents of the guy going to the girl's parents' house to "investigate" her whether she's engaged/married/widowed/divorce, to see her characters, and the mother of the guy will have a personal session with the girl asking her questions and look at her hair, skin, face etc.

2) Engagement Ceremony

The guy's family will bring the ring and loads of gifts to the bride's family. If the girl agreed to the engagement the mother of her fiancee will put the engagement ring on her finger. During this time both families would decide on the date of the marriage ceremony and on the mahr to be paid by the groom.

3) Marriage Course and HIV test

Both future to be bride and groom must completed marriage course and did HIV test before the marriage.

4) Nikah Ceremony

Usually held in the mosque of the bride's neighbourhood. The father of the bride will act as the agent and will make the marriage contract with the groom.. they have to utter the Ijab (Offer) and Qabul (Acceptance) of the marriage clearly (usually the whole neighbourhood can hear it)... in the northern region usually the Imam will test the groom with loads of religious questions and the groom would have to recite the Koran so the whole neighbourhood could listen to him.

The groom also have to proclaim and sign "Ta'liq Divorce Statement" after the ceremony which gives right to the wife to seek a divorce automatically if the husband abused her or neglected her.

5) Walimatul Urus Ceremonies

A grand feast at the bride's house where thousands of people would be invited. The bride and groom will be introduced to the public. And there are so many detailed (some unIslamic, like "menepung tawar" which is Hindu tradition) traditions involved during this time.. but many couples opted for Islamic wedding ceremony nowadays.

Then the next day, another grand feast at the groom's house...

Costs for a wedding in Malaysia is somewhere between RM 50,000.00 - RM 100,000.00

 

[latiffa]

Thank u my brother north_malaysian !

Really I think it is so interesting to know more about the traditions of every country. Never know how u can arrived in another country than ur and want to get married and u,ll need to know all of these informations.

It was something new for me to know that in Malaysia before marriage the peoples need test HIV! Soo strange but usefull I think!

 

[CosmicPathos]

i think it depends on whether the family's are traditional/cultural or religious. i think with cultural, you'll have more of a headache, then with religious.

i wasn't bought up all that culturally, so i cant really say what the wedding traditions are like in my culture though im sure we've had some cultural influence in our weddings/marriages in one way or another. the only thing that i can think of for now is that cultural people want it mixed or at the least have the groom sit next to the bride in the hall full of the lady guests (so its meant to be an all ladies affair, but its okay for the husband to sit there cos apparently he's only looking at his wife :hmm...some people may find that odd if the groom isnt there. also cultural people like to play haraam music as well <---that ones really hard to get away from...

unfortunately in my culture you may get the odd idiot who nicks off with his wife's wealth/mahr, makes it sound like he doesn't have any money to pay her her mahr(but alhamdulillah that tends to be rare)...

What do you mean by religious wedding? You mean Islamic marriage? Islamic marriage, from religious point of view, has also some cultural elements of the Arabs of Prophet's time. So no wedding ceremony is purely "religious." For example playing Duff. Duff was a musical instrument of local Arabs. Prophet pbuh allowed it. But does it become "religious?" Its a cultural artifact. Same with mosque. Wedding in mosque is Sunnah. What about the design of that mosque? Each cultural region has different mosque designs. Same with wedding organization. You cannot escape culture. Why? Culture is the physical manifestation of the diversity of ideas that are born into the diverse minds of men (and women).

 

[north_malaysian]

It was something new for me to know that in Malaysia before marriage the peoples need test HIV! Soo strange but usefull I think!

Currently, only Muslim couples are obliged to do this test. They are also encouraged to do Thalassemia test... I heard that Thalassemia test might be a must in the future.

 

[CosmicPathos]

Currently, only Muslim couples are obliged to do this test. They are also encouraged to do Thalassemia test... I heard that Thalassemia test might be a must in the future.

I understand HIV testing because it is transmittable to the spouse but what about thalassemia. Do you think grooms or brides who gave positive tests for this were rejected from marrying afterwards? This might have severe ramifications for such people. May Allah (swt) give them better spouses in the Jannah.

 

[latiffa]

Currently, only Muslim couples are obliged to do this test. They are also encouraged to do Thalassemia test... I heard that Thalassemia test might be a must in the future.

Sorry I ask my brother, but what is "Thalassemia test" ?

 

[Woodrow]

Sorry I ask my brother, but what is "Thalassemia test" ?

Thalassemia is a hereditary blood disorder. It cause incurable anmia as the person can not properly produce hemoglobin. If you inherit the gene for it from one parent, you will be a carrier of the disorder, but have no symptoms. If you inherit it from both parents you will have the symptoms and suffer from anemia.

If a couple that are planning to marry and both test positive for the gene, they may want to think carefully about having children as the children will be born with incurable anemia.

If both of the parents are free from the gene, there is no risk. If either has the gene there is a chance any children will be carriers, but not have the condition themselves.

 

[north_malaysian]

Thalassemia is a hereditary blood disorder. It cause incurable anmia as the person can not properly produce hemoglobin. If you inherit the gene for it from one parent, you will be a carrier of the disorder, but have no symptoms. If you inherit it from both parents you will have the symptoms and suffer from anemia.

If a couple that are planning to marry and both test positive for the gene, they may want to think carefully about having children as the children will be born with incurable anemia.

If both of the parents are free from the gene, there is no risk. If either has the gene there is a chance any children will be carriers, but not have the condition themselves.

good explanation Uncle Woodrow, thanks.... in Malaysia, especially among Muslims in the northern region there are many Thalassemia carriers..

 

[north_malaysian]

Do you think grooms or brides who gave positive tests for this were rejected from marrying afterwards? This might have severe ramifications for such people. May Allah (swt) give them better spouses in the Jannah.

It's not being made obligatory for the time being... but I dont think even when it's made obligatory the positive couple are not allowed to marry each other... because currently even the HIV positive people are allowed to get married... but they have to produce the test report first before marrying.

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

Thalassemia is a hereditary blood disorder. It cause incurable anmia as the person can not properly produce hemoglobin. If you inherit the gene for it from one parent, you will be a carrier of the disorder, but have no symptoms. If you inherit it from both parents you will have the symptoms and suffer from anemia.

If a couple that are planning to marry and both test positive for the gene, they may want to think carefully about having children as the children will be born with incurable anemia.

If both of the parents are free from the gene, there is no risk. If either has the gene there is a chance any children will be carriers, but not have the condition themselves.

maybe im missing something, but i don't understand not marrying someone because they have a disease. whose to say that they wont get something 2ice as bad later on or already have another disease :? you're going to inherit one "strange" thing or another...so what difference does it make :?

 

[CosmicPathos]

It's not being made obligatory for the time being... but I dont think even when it's made obligatory the positive couple are not allowed to marry each other... because currently even the HIV positive people are allowed to get married... but they have to produce the test report first before marrying.

Bro, I understand that. But do you think if a certain person has a disease and it is unveiled, its better to be unveiled before marriage though, do you think the other party decides to not marry this carrier? If every party starts doing this, how will this person get married in this world? Is there a way for them to escape out of it? I think the solution is to just wait for a spouse in Jannah?

Thank you for your answers.

 

[syilla]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3bGAdOs3iI&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wbQdWF3aKL0


It is true... sometimes this need should put in the closet. But one should consider this as a preparation once they got married. Just imagine those children that would get infected. Are they really prepared of taking care of those children. What will happened to the children once the parent died.

I just think is selfish for someone to make his/her disease as a secret...when one will be married for as long as he/she lived.

 

[CosmicPathos]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3bGAdOs3iI&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wbQdWF3aKL0


It is true... sometimes this need should put in the closet. But one should consider this as a preparation once they got married. Just imagine those children that would get infected. Are they really prepared of taking care of those children. What will happened to the children once the parent died.

I just think is selfish for someone to make his/her disease as a secret...when one will be married for as long as he/she lived.

I agree. What if he decides to marry a barren woman? They will have no children. But what if he unveils the disease the family of the woman reject him just cuz from the fear of the disease ...