How to Maintain a Beard?

[Jalal~]

This is stressing me out a bit. Every time my beard grows out, it just doesn't come out right. It grows on the jaw/chin area and the cheeks, but in between these areas it doesn't grow as much. And when it does start to come out, it's just all over the place, and no matter how much shampoo/conditioner i put on, it doesn't straighten out. Combing it with a brush doesn't help much either, its just sticking out of my face. And then in the chin area, my beard makes me look like a goat. Both my friends and family say I look like an idiot, and family usually makes me trim it.
What should i do?

 

[tango92]

keep the beard man, put some trust in Allah

it doesnt matter if it doesnt look amazing, thats not why your keeping it anyway; still im sure its not that bad

sorry if im unhelpful

 

[tigerkhan]

bro when u r doing some things for the happiness of Creator, then don't care whether creatures like it or not.

 

[Scimitar]

go to a barber

 

[Muhammad]

Wa Alaykum Assalaam,

go to a barber

But won't the barber trim the beard?

Brother Jalal, try to be patient with your beard because it is normal for it to grow at different speeds and look patchy at the beginning. Let it grow naturally and you can try oiling and combing it. As above, don't worry what people think or say - you are doing this for Allaah (swt) and because you love the Prophet (sallallaahu alayhi wasallam) and wish to follow his commands. Try to explain to your family why you wish to keep a beard. Always ask Allaah (swt) for His help and to give you the strength and tawfeeq to perform your duties.

 

[جوري]

Wa Alaykum Assalaam,

But won't the barber trim the beard?

Brother Jalal, try to be patient with your beard because it is normal for it to grow at different speeds and look patchy at the beginning. Let it grow naturally and you can try oiling and combing it. As above, don't worry what people think or say - you are doing this for Allaah (swt) and because you love the Prophet (sallallaahu alayhi wasallam) and wish to follow his commands. Try to explain to your family why you wish to keep a beard. Always ask Allaah (swt) for His help and to give you the strength and tawfeeq to perform your duties.

I don't want to interfere with sunnah or a guy issue apparently and to voice my personal preference I love beards as it reminds me of my childhood and how my dad used to rub his beard on my cheeks to bug or wake me up, however it is known that the sahaba did trim their beards, they'd grab it with the palm and whatever is below that got chopped off. Some also didn't have a beard for I just translated the piece on Moath ibn Jabal to find out he didn't have one at all which surprised me.. So yes he should have patience in shaa Allah but also not put undue stress on the self.. me thinkus..

 

[Jalal~]

thanks for the advice everyone. its just that every time we go get a haircut, my parents always force the barber to trim the beard. no matter how many times i explain it to them, no one listens, only because they think it looks horrible. This is just pathetic really...one day when i resist too much, i feel like my dad is going to slap me really hard :/ no one really cares i guess...always gotta impress others.

 

[Hulk]

How old are you homes? For some guys their beard maturity level is different. Some will only have their beards grow in fully in their 30s 40s etc. I'd suggest just letting it grow but at the same time trim slightly to even things out if it looks weird. Try to keep it up a few months then at least you'll know just what kinda beard you got. To me it sounds like you got a pretty good one

 

[Jalal~]

almost 18. and i know its definitely not going to grow all the way out at this age, but im not given the chance to let it grow out. Thats why i was asking for suggestions on how to make it look better w/o trimming it.
Someone mentioned oiling: does this help the beard not be all over the place? How often should i oil it? i usually put shampoo & conditioner on ever 2-3 days, but it only helps a little.
More suggestions would be wonderful.

 

[Scimitar]

there are a few things to try, like oil. Keep a small fine toothed comb around also, make it your beard comb.

 

[Endymion]

My brother once told me this story but he don't know the source.

There was a Sahabah who could only grow a single hair on his chin. The people in Medina used to joke with him about it & some used to s****** as he walked past. The sahaba got upset as he desired a full beard, and did not like being teased. One day he walked past the Prophet(saw) who also smiled at seeing his beard. The sahaba got upset pulled out the single hair.

The Prophet(saw) surprised & upset asked why he had done that. He said that he could handle others teasing him about his beard, but couldn't handle it the the Prophet(saw) also found it amusing. The Prophet(Saw) replied that he was not laughing at the beard, but happy to see so many angels playing on the single strand!


Ermm... im embarrass telling you this but it might help you.The sikh's usually have long and brushy beard.They apply egg and yoghurt on their beards.Give it a try,may be it works :hmm:

 

[Insaanah]

^ I was trying to find the narration/hadeeth that had that story in it, but looks like it doesn't exist:

http://www.islamweb.net/emainpage/index.php?page=showfatwa&Option=FatwaId&Id=91809
http://www.islam.tc/cgi-bin/askimam/ask.pl?q=14105&act=print

Edit: First link not working at the moment, here's the text:

Fatwa No : 91809
The Hadith about the man with one strand of hairs as his beard
Fatwa Date : Rabee' Al-Awwal 5, 1427 / 4-4-2006

Question
Is there a Hadeeth which talks about a person who had ONLY one strand of hair as his beard, to which an Angel was hanging, and our Prophet smiled at it? Please advice.

Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.

After having searched the narration you are asking about, we neither found it in the available books of Prophetic narrations nor in the books of known scholars.
Allaah Knows best.

 

[جوري]

They apply egg and yoghurt on their beards

Doesn't sound terribly hygienic :skeleton:

 

[tango92]

i know a brother whose keeping a beard and its very light, it looks like a first beard. anyway its stopped growing and its really short, but Alhumdulillah now he does not have the trial of having to keep a fist length beard which some people say is a minimum requirement

so yh, if you keep it early it will hopefully stay short and light - it can get hard to maintain and tangly when it gets longer and thicker

 

[Salahudeen]

My friend uses hair straightener on his beard and it comes out all soft and silky like Chinese beard, it looses that thick fuzzy curly look and has smooth texture which is nice for stroking ;D

 

[marwen]

They apply egg and yoghurt on their beards

Doesn't sound terribly hygienic

Eggs and yoghurt whould make a nice breakfast.

 

[جوري]

Eggs and yoghurt whould make a nice breakfast.

I am not a fan of eggs.. they're too eggy.. I like to find a substitute and usually apple sauce fills that purpose except in crème brûlée there's no way around it then-- I try then to remove the chalaza.. grosses me to bits .. I am honestly a nightmare to please when it comes to food and I am never happy eating out or drinking out either .. so I can't imagine someone putting an egg on any part of their body let alone their hair... ugh +o(

 

[Muhammad]

I don't want to interfere with sunnah or a guy issue apparently and to voice my personal preference I love beards as it reminds me of my childhood and how my dad used to rub his beard on my cheeks to bug or wake me up, however it is known that the sahaba did trim their beards, they'd grab it with the palm and whatever is below that got chopped off. Some also didn't have a beard for I just translated the piece on Moath ibn Jabal to find out he didn't have one at all which surprised me.. So yes he should have patience in shaa Allah but also not put undue stress on the self.. me thinkus..

:wa:

At the moment, it seems the brother is having trouble with the very beginnings of a beard, so I meant he should be patient until it grows into whatever length he believes is closest to the sunnah. I was also surprised about the website saying Mu'adh bin Jabal (may Allaah be pleased with him) was beardless - I think this needs verifying and in any case, it is known that there are people who are unable to grow facial hair or their beards are naturally small.

On the issue of combing and oiling:

... But it should be noted that Islam is the religion of beauty, as it was narrated in the hadeeth, “[A man said,] ‘What if a man likes his clothes and his shoes to look good?’ The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, ‘Allaah is Beautiful and loves beauty.’” (Narrated by Muslim, al-Eemaan, 131).

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) commanded [one of his companions] to change grey hair, when he said, “Change this grey hair, but avoid black.” (Narrated by Muslim, Kitaab al-Libaas wa’l-Zeenah, 2102).

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) recommended combing hair, and said, “Whoever has hair, let him take care of it.” (Abu Dawood, Kitaab al-Tarajjul, 3632. Al-Albaani said in Saheeh Sunan Abi Dawood: it is hasan saheeh. Hadeeth no. 3509).

Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar said: “Ibn Battaal said: combing means tidying the hair of the head and beard, and oiling it.” This is the Sunnah of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Whoever turns away from my Sunnah has nothing to do with me.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, al-Nikaah, 4675)

It should be noted that the beauty referred to is shar’i or Islamic beauty (beauty as prescribed in Islam), and not the so-called beauty which appeals to sick minds which are enamoured of kaafir fashions and the appearance of corrupt people such as male and female actors and singers, or fashion models...
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http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/9977/

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[جوري]

At the moment, it seems the brother is having trouble with the very beginnings of a beard, so I meant he should be patient until it grows into whatever length he believes is closest to the sunnah. I was also surprised about the website saying Mu'adh bin Jabal (may Allaah be pleased with him) was beardless - I think this needs verifying and in any case, it is known that there are people who are unable to grow facial hair or their beards are naturally small.

:wa:
agreed.

here are the four mazahib's views on growing and caring for a beard:

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة أنصار السنة
الحنفية - قالوا : يحرم حلق لحية الرجل ويسن ألا تزيد في طولها على القبضة فما زاد على القبضة يقص ولا بأس بأخذ أطراف اللحية وحلق الشعر الذي تحت الإبطين ونتف الشيب وتسن المبالغة في قص الشارب حتى يوازي الحرف الأعلى من الشفة العليا .

المالكية - قالوا : يحرم حلق اللحية . ويسن قص الشارب وليس المراد قصه جميعه بل السنة أن يقص منه طرف الشعر المستدير النازل على الشفة العليا فيؤخذ منه حتى يظهر طرف الشفة وما عدا ذلك فهو مكروه

الحنابلة - قالوا : يحرم حلق اللحية . ولا بأس بأخذ ما زاد على القبضة فلا يكره قصه كما لا يكره تركه

الشافعية - أما اللحية فإنه يكره حلقها ( كراهة تحريم ) والمبالغة في قصها فإذا زادت على القبضة فإن الأمر فيه سهل خصوصا إذا ترتب عليه تسوية للخفة أو تعريض به ونحو ذلك .
المصدر الفقه على المذاهب الأربعة - المجلد الثاني - باب حكم إزالة الشعر وقص الأظافر



probably one of my favorite sayings by imam malik ra7imaho Allah (on people who are taken by superficial appearances is this:
روي عن مالك رحمه الله أنه قال: لا تغرنكم اللحى، فإن التيس له لحية

in other words don't be fooled by beards for surely 'at'ys' which is a goat I guess this creature

has a beard and obviously neither bright nor pious.


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[جوري]

and as one wise sheikh from azhar once said : law kan kul zi li7yatin fylasofan la kan at'tyes aflatonan'

If everyone with a beard is a philosopher then surely the tys/goat above is Aflaton.. ;D
sorry I couldn't resist...