Issa
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Re: Starting to have second thoughts.
As-salamu Alaykum,
I don't know a lot about hadith yet. I am new to Islam. I think you made a point here. The Imam has marked all hadith (authentic and unauthentic). I think what Ameen is trying to say is that a person reading the hadith may decide on his own which one to follow and which one to push aside. I mean no disrespect to Ameen but I think he/she(sorry it doesn't say..) is putting blame on the wrong person (the author/Imam). If I don't like a certain hadith I can tell myself it is unauthentic or ignore it ( I shouldn't but I can) and if I like another I can run with it a base my lifestyle off of it. I think the abusive man from the other thread may be doing this or he may just be disturbed....
I never disputed that there are fabricated or unauthentic hadith out there. But our scholars and Muhaditheen have already studied them and classified them, and if someone reads a hadith they should ask the scholars concerning its authenticity and context.
The issue here is your campaign against hadith and the fact that you attribute someone's bad manners to hadith without any basis for this at all!
Yes, let's talk about Imam Adh-Dhahabi's book, Al-Kabâ'ir. First of all, if anyone read the book properly they would see that the chapter right after women is about men! And Imam Adh-Dhahabi begins the chapter by writing:
Lest one should suppose that all the responsibilities are on the wife and all the rights belong to the husband, we mention that the husband is obliged to be gentle, kind, and loving to his wife. He must show forbearance and patience toward her in case she is occasionally abusive or ill-tempered. It is his duty to feed and clothe her and to provide for her needs well, within his means, according to the command of Allah Most High: Live with them on a footing of kindness and equity (4:19) and the advice of the Prophet: Consult with women. Indeed, you have some rights over your women and they have some rights over you. It is their right on you that you provide for their food and clothing generously, and your right on them is that they do not let anyone whom you dislike in the house, walking upon your floor. (Related by Ibn Majah and Tirmidhi who declared it Hasan Saheeh)The last hadith about 'Umar is a beautiful example of the lofty status that Islam has given women. The Khalifa himself used to listen patiently while his wife scolded him and he instructed his followers to likewise be patient and grateful for all the favours their wives gave them. Dr. M. Moinuddin Siddiqui, who has translated Al-Kabâ'ir into english, includes the following footnote in the place I have marked above with an asterisk [*]:
He said: "The best among you is the one who is best to his wife" (Related by Ibn Hibban) in another version it is the one who is most kind to his wife. The Prophet himself was very gentle and kind in dealing with women.
The Prophet saws also said: "If any man shows patience with his wife's bad temper, Allah will give him a reward similar to the reward of Ayyub (Job) for his patience, and if any woman shows patience with her husband's bad temper, Allah will give her a reward similar to the reward of Asiyah daughter of Muzahim, the wife of Pharoah (Cf. Qur'an 66:11)."
It is reported that a man came to 'Umar ibn Al-Khattab raa to complain about his wife's ill-temper. While he was waiting for 'Umar to come out of his house, he heard 'Umar's wife scolding him and 'Umar quietly listening to her, and not answering her back. The man turned around and started walking away, muttering to himself: "If that is the case with 'Umar, the leader of the believers, who is famous for his uprighteness and toughness, then what about poor me?!" At that moment, 'Umar came out of his house and saw the man walking away. He called him and said, "What is it you want of me, O man?" The man replied: "O leader of the believers, I came to complain to you about my wife's bad-temper and how she nags me. Then I heard your wife doing the same to you, so I turned around, muttering to myself, 'If that is the situation of the leader of the believers, then what about me?'" 'Umar replied, "O my brother, I bear with her because of her rights over me. She cooks my food, bakes my bread, washes my clothes, breast-feeds my child...and yet none of these are her duty;* and then she is a comfort to my heart and keeps me away from forbidden deeds. Consequently, I bear with her." The man said, "It is the same with me, O leader of the believers." 'Umar said: "Then, O my brother, be patient with her, indeed this life is short. (Adh-Dhahabi, Al-Kabâ'ir 194)
According to the Shari'ah, a Muslim wife has no obligation to do all this; rather, it is the husband's obligation to take care of it [either himself or] by hiring a servant (or even, in the case of breast-feeding, a wet-nurse). Therefore, if a woman does this, it is out of good-will and compliance on her part, not because it is obligatory on her, and conseuqnelty it is a cause for appreciation and helpfulness on the part of her husband. (Translator)So we can see quite clearly that far from being mysognistic, the book of Imam Dhahabi contains beautiful hadith which shed light on the equity and justice of Islam.
As for the other hadith Imam Dhahab quotes earlier in his chapter on women, yes some of them are unauthentic but he mentions this and gives the source each time. So if anyone reads his work they will not be misguided. Besides, when someone reads these things they can always confirm them with a scholar and find out from our shuyukh the status of these ahadith.
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As-salamu Alaykum,
I don't know a lot about hadith yet. I am new to Islam. I think you made a point here. The Imam has marked all hadith (authentic and unauthentic). I think what Ameen is trying to say is that a person reading the hadith may decide on his own which one to follow and which one to push aside. I mean no disrespect to Ameen but I think he/she(sorry it doesn't say..) is putting blame on the wrong person (the author/Imam). If I don't like a certain hadith I can tell myself it is unauthentic or ignore it ( I shouldn't but I can) and if I like another I can run with it a base my lifestyle off of it. I think the abusive man from the other thread may be doing this or he may just be disturbed....